# Simpsosns characters that should be killed off **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 16, 2003, 6:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026 "2003-01-16T18:37:23Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/21 "2003-01-17T02:11:35Z")
I’ve never seen the Simpso **s** ns. Is it a cheap knock-off of _The Simpsons_? If so, then all the characters should be killed! ---
**Author:** ![av8rmike](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/edb3f5/32.png) [@av8rmike](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/av8rmike)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/22 "2003-01-17T02:18:18Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dooku \* > \*\*Hans’ hook is that he’s a gajillion years old. They use him to mock the elderly that still drive and have no business doing so. Or that he looks like he’s been dead for years already and yet is still alive. Or that he’s in constant pain all the time. > \*\* “My name is Hans. Drinking has ruined my life. I’m 31 years old!” ---
**Author:** ![kasuo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/8c91f0/32.png) [@kasuo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kasuo)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/23 "2003-01-17T02:35:46Z")
Lisa: damn commie Gil: boring That one businesswoman who uses buzz words: she just plain ticks me off ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/24 "2003-01-17T02:37:59Z")
Bleedin’ Gums Murphy and Dr. Marvin Monroe What? ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/25 "2003-01-17T03:07:42Z")
Hans Moleman _has_ been killed off, [many many times](http://lowb.org/alan/hans/). He’s like Kenny, only funny. ---
**Author:** ![SenorBeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/senorbeef/32/2220_2.png) [@SenorBeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SenorBeef)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 5:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/26 "2003-01-17T05:02:22Z")
Who is Gil? ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 5:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/27 "2003-01-17T05:22:17Z")
Gil is the desperate salesman, apparently a takeoff on Jack Lemmon in **Glengarry Glen Ross**. I think his first appearance was as one of Marge’s cow-orkers when she was selling real estate. When Marge and Homer were caught naked at the mini-golf course (you just have to have seen the episode), they jacked the hot-air balloon from a car dealership, thereby breaking Gil’s heart because he’d been living in it. He also sold, or tried to sell, computers to Springfield Elementary. I don’t know what else he’s done, but I’m sure others can fill you in. ---
**Author:** ![Alphagene](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8e7dd6/32.png) [@Alphagene](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alphagene)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/28 "2003-01-17T06:11:38Z")
Aw, ya can’t kill Gil! And Lisa’s gotta stay too. IMO, she’s pretty much Matt Groening’s voice. Most of y’all are familiar with _Life In Hell_. She’s basically Bongo. Youthful optimism combined with the misery of being intelligent enough to see things as they are. Plus she’s the classic Middle Child. She’s representin’. Bah, I’ve defended her vociferously in a previous thread. I’ll spare you my full wrath, ya cretins. It seems like Lindsey Nagle was created simply because the writers realized that without her, Springfield’s intellectual elite would be entirely male. ---
**Author:** ![Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/raymond_luxury_yacht/32/4099_2.png) [@Raymond\_Luxury\_Yacht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Raymond_Luxury_Yacht)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/29 "2003-01-17T06:13:40Z")
I thought Gil first appeared in the pretzel episode, no? ---
**Author:** ![Cazzle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cazzle/32/75_2.png) [@Cazzle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cazzle)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/30 "2003-01-17T06:19:49Z")
Sorry, Gil has got to go. ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 6:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/31 "2003-01-17T06:24:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jehovah68 \* > \*\*I thought Gil first appeared in the pretzel episode, no? \*\* Archives say no. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 1:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/32 "2003-01-17T13:35:09Z")
I’m gonna get flamed for this, but I wish they would give a decent ending to Lionel Hutz and especially Troy McClure. I hated the way they just dropped them. ---
**Author:** ![Tuckerfan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 1:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/33 "2003-01-17T13:58:26Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Annie-Xmas \* > \*\*I’m gonna get flamed for this, but I wish they would give a decent ending to Lionel Hutz and especially Troy McClure. I hated the way they just dropped them. \*\* Well, that’s kind of hard since they were both voiced by Phil Hartman and I’d rather that they just dropped them, than to have someone else try and do the voices for even one episode. BTW, Frye on _Futurama_ was given the first name “Phil” in memorial of Hartman. ---
**Author:** ![elf6c](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c57346/32.png) [@elf6c](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elf6c)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/34 "2003-01-17T14:08:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Annie-Xmas \* > \*\*I’m gonna get flamed for this, but I wish they would give a decent ending to Lionel Hutz and especially Troy McClure. I hated the way they just dropped them. \*\* It would be tough, based on what happened to Phil. Here is the “official” explanation: > [@](#): > > With the passing of Phil Hartman, will Troy McClure and Lionel Hutz have new voices? > > No. Matt Groening has retired the characters out of respect for Phil, and another voice actor will not be supplying their voices in place of Mr Hartman. > > Likewise, Lunchlady Doris has also been retired out of respect for Doris Grau, who died in 1995. [http://www.snpp.com/guides/lisa-4.html#4.1.6](http://www.snpp.com/guides/lisa-4.html#4.1.6) * * * Gil The complete guide to Gil from SNNP: [http://www.snpp.com/guides/gil.file.html](http://www.snpp.com/guides/gil.file.html) Appearances 5F06 Working at Red Blazer Realty 5F10 Working as a salesman at Goody New Shoes 5F14 Awaiting an audit at the I.R.S. building 5F18 Working at a used car lot AABF03 Installing computers at Springfield Elementary AABF05 At the Leavelle’s Bodyguard Academy AABF06 Gambling his company payroll in Las Vegas AABF10 Selling cars at the O.K. Car-Ral AABF13 Salesman for Señor Ding-Dong’s Doorbell Fiesta AABF19 Homer slaps him with a glove in the Kwik-E-Mart AABF21 Telemarketing for the Springfield Shopper sales department BABF03 In charge of “cleanup” at the Kwik-E-Mart BABF14 Tries to sell Amway during an AA meeting CABF10 Lives in the storage locker next to Sideshow Bob ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 7:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/35 "2003-01-17T19:42:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jehovah68 \* > \*\*I thought Gil first appeared in the pretzel episode, no? \*\* Actually, Jack Lemmon (whose leads-needing salesman in _Glengarry Glen Ross_ was the inspiration for Gil) was in the pretzel episode. It wouldn’t surprise me if his guest-shot told the _Simpsons_ writers that a meek, desperate salesman character would be good for a few laughs. [The Gil File](http://www.snpp.com/guides/gil.file.html) Gil’s first appearance was in “Realty Bites” a few months after Lemmon’s appearance: Lionel [manager of “Red Blazer Realty”]: Welcome to the big league, Marge. There’s over fifty years of experience right in this room! And forty-two of those years are Gil’s! Gil: Marge, it’s a real pleasure! You got any leads? I need some leads… please… help me! Lionel: That’s enough, Gil… don’t drag her down with you. Since then, Gil’s moved on to other jobs, but never loses the stink of failure. ---
**Author:** ![Bryan\_Ekers](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bryan_ekers/32/183_2.png) [@Bryan\_Ekers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bryan_Ekers)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 7:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/36 "2003-01-17T19:44:49Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tuckerfan \* > BTW, Frye on _Futurama_ was given the first name “Phil” in memorial of Hartman. Hmmm, you’re probably right, but I can’t remember anyone ever calling Fry “Phil”. It’s always “Philip”. It’s just a damn shame Hartman never got to voice Zap Branigan, since the character was obviously written for him. ---
**Author:** ![MissTake](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/misstake/32/3189_2.png) [@MissTake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MissTake)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/37 "2003-01-17T19:47:18Z")
Grampa. Get rid of him. PLEASE. Maybe he and Skinner’s Mom could die in some kind of Viagra rage incident. That would be cool. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rilchiam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/2bfe46/32.png) [@Rilchiam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rilchiam)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/38 "2003-01-17T21:28:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bryan Ekers \* > \*\*Actually, Jack Lemmon (whose leads-needing salesman in _Glengarry Glen Ross_ was the inspiration for Gil) was in the pretzel episode. It wouldn’t surprise me if his guest-shot told the _Simpsons_ writers that a meek, desperate salesman character would be good for a few laughs. > > \*\* Aha! I’d forgotten! So neither of us was wrong. I like when that happens! ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2003, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/39 "2003-01-17T22:48:25Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Dooku \* > \*\*Hans’ hook is that he’s a gajillion years old. They use him to mock the elderly that still drive and have no business doing so. Or that he looks like he’s been dead for years already and yet is still alive. Or that he’s in constant pain all the time. > > Gimme Hans over Gil any day… \*\* \ He’s only 31. ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2003, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026/40 "2003-01-18T15:36:33Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bryan Ekers \* > \*\*It’s just a damn shame Hartman never got to voice Zap Branigan, since the character was obviously written for him. \*\* He was. Billy West does a good job at a Hartmanesque voice, but he’s no Phil. I think Hans Moleman is funny, myself. “Welcome to _Moleman in the Morning_. Good Moleman to you. Today, part three in the continuing series which is my miserable life.” “Chicken, yellow, mailman…” “Sir, that’s the wine list.” “Very well.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/simpsosns-characters-that-should-be-killed-off/149026.md?page=3)