# Sing along with our pets! **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 10, 2007, 7:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248 "2007-07-10T19:23:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![lisacurl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/41988e/32.png) [@lisacurl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lisacurl)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 1:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/41 "2007-07-13T13:22:03Z")
[QUOTE=Purplkid\_Caterer] To the tune of Davy Crockett… Bubba! Bubba Schnoodle! King of the wild Schnoodliers. [/QUOTE] I like this one… the Davy Crockett tune has many possibilities, although it’s going to be difficult to top “king of the wild Schnoodliers”. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 1:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/42 "2007-07-13T13:25:09Z")
Agreed. If anyone can top “schnoodliers”, well, you’re a god amongst men (and furballs). ---
**Author:** ![Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sticks_and_scones/32/16951_2.png) [@Sticks\_and\_Scones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sticks_and_Scones)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/43 "2007-07-13T17:04:12Z")
😃 I’m almost a god amongst men and furballs!!! ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/44 "2007-07-13T17:29:10Z")
[QUOTE=anyrose] “why do cats follow me around every time i sit down” does that jog your memory at all? 🙂 [/QUOTE] Yeah…there was something like… When I peeeee, They want to beeee, Close to me… 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/45 "2007-07-13T18:11:13Z")
Close To Me fragment (start at the “on the day that you were born” part) Every time I go in there the cats all get together And decide to go along to watch the show So I try to shut the door But then they meow And I can’t seem to tell them no! Tell me why All the cats round here Want to see My bare rear? When I pee They want to be Close to me **Boscibo** , I’m having no luck at all with Copacabana! ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/46 "2007-07-13T21:03:51Z")
Wheee! (wee?) ---
**Author:** ![Kairos](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ecc23a/32.png) [@Kairos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kairos)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 9:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/47 "2007-07-13T21:13:43Z")
I don’t really sing to my cats, but when one of them starts acting particularly strange (like right now, Isadora is [licking the futon frame](http://www.siliconashes.net/%7Eimbrium/wp-images/Isadora%20and%20the%20Futon.jpg)) I’ll call him or her “psycho kitten,” which is inevitably followed up by “qu’est-ce que c’est?” I never get much further than finishing out the chorus, though. ---
**Author:** ![anyrose](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/54ee81/32.png) [@anyrose](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/anyrose)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/48 "2007-07-13T21:23:44Z")
> [@](#): > > “qu’est-ce que c’est?” for those who don’t know, it sounds like kes-ka-say 😉 😃 ---
**Author:** ![psychobunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/54ee81/32.png) [@psychobunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/psychobunny)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/49 "2007-07-13T22:18:02Z")
_F to the E to the L-I-N-E yes, you’re feline, F to the E to the L-I-N-E yes, you’re feline, You’re delicious, your furrilicious. Furrilicious definition you’re a furry kitty…_ To the tune of **He is an Englishman** _For he is very furry and his voice it is quite purry. Yes he is a kitty cat, Yes he is a kitty cat. For he might have been a puppy, Or sheep, or goat or guppy, Or perhaps an elephant, Or perhaps an elephant. But in spite of any wishes, To belong to other species, He remains a kitty cat, He remains a ki-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-i-ty cat._ ---
**Author:** ![Beaucarnea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c0e974/32.png) [@Beaucarnea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beaucarnea)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/50 "2007-07-13T22:33:16Z")
Sung to the tune of Queen’s Bohemian Rapsody: Tom has the good life He has the easy job Naps in the bathtub Nada responsibility In your sandwich And in your milk whiskers be- I’m just a shorthair, don’t you try brushing me Because I’m spreading hair high and low In your eyes, up your nose Everywhere the fur blows, you aren’t the boss of me of me of me Mama, just killed a mouse Slapped a paw upside his head Bit his neck and now he’s dead Mama, mouse was just alive But now its guts are strewn in the hallway Mama, ooo ooo Didn’t mean to make you sick If I don’t eat some grass this time tomorrow In the hall you will find a revolting gall bladder… Uh oh, my hairball’s out In hidden corners you will find Kitty’s hacking all the time Let me out, please mama, I’ve got to go Gotta eat some grass outside and barf again Mama Ooo-ooo Fur don’t want to fly You must wish I’d been born a hairless Sphinx I see a little silhouetto of a rat Siamese Siamese will you steal a baby’s breath, O? Carpet sweeper vaccum cleaner very very frightening me Catarina Catarina Catarina Catarina Catarina howls outside picture window I’m just a fixed Tom nobody breeds me He’s just a fixed Tom from a rescue family Spared him his life from the upright vacuum Here she comes, she’s in heat will you let me go Pet door locked! No- we will not let you go Pet door locked! We will not let you go-let him go Pet door locked! We will not let you go-let me go Will not let you go-let me go No,no,no,no,no,no,no- Mama mia,mama mia,mama mia let me go- Overheated stray cat wailing in the moonlight for me, for me, for me!!! So you think you can alter me and I’ll sit in your lap So you think you can neuter me I’ll stay inside Oh, mommy- can’t baby me, Mommy Just gotta go out, just gotta go right out and breed her Your curtains are in tatters Visitors can see You aren’t the boss of me, you cater to and cleanup after me… Everywhere the fur blows…. ---
**Author:** ![TroubleAgain](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e480ec/32.png) [@TroubleAgain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TroubleAgain)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 11:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/51 "2007-07-13T23:26:27Z")
Wins! ---
**Author:** ![Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9d8465/32.png) [@Swallowed\_My\_Cellphone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Swallowed_My_Cellphone)\ **Post date:** [July 13, 2007, 11:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/52 "2007-07-13T23:44:53Z")
I stand humbled in the shadows of such brilliance. ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 3:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/53 "2007-07-14T03:41:31Z")
_holds my lighter aloft_ ---
**Author:** ![Wile\_E](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/c37758/32.png) [@Wile\_E](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wile_E)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 3:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/54 "2007-07-14T03:50:29Z")
[QUOTE=Beaucarnea] Sung to the tune of Queen’s Bohemian Rapsody: Tom has the good life He has the easy job Naps in the bathtub Nada responsibility In your sandwich And in your milk whiskers be- I’m just a shorthair, don’t you try brushing me Because I’m spreading hair high and low In your eyes, up your nose Everywhere the fur blows, you aren’t the boss of me of me of me Mama, just killed a mouse Slapped a paw upside his head Bit his neck and now he’s dead Mama, mouse was just alive But now its guts are strewn in the hallway Mama, ooo ooo Didn’t mean to make you sick If I don’t eat some grass this time tomorrow In the hall you will find a revolting gall bladder… Uh oh, my hairball’s out In hidden corners you will find Kitty’s hacking all the time Let me out, please mama, I’ve got to go Gotta eat some grass outside and barf again Mama Ooo-ooo Fur don’t want to fly You must wish I’d been born a hairless Sphinx I see a little silhouetto of a rat Siamese Siamese will you steal a baby’s breath, O? Carpet sweeper vaccum cleaner very very frightening me Catarina Catarina Catarina Catarina Catarina howls outside picture window I’m just a fixed Tom nobody breeds me He’s just a fixed Tom from a rescue family Spared him his life from the upright vacuum Here she comes, she’s in heat will you let me go Pet door locked! No- we will not let you go Pet door locked! We will not let you go-let him go Pet door locked! We will not let you go-let me go Will not let you go-let me go No,no,no,no,no,no,no- Mama mia,mama mia,mama mia let me go- Overheated stray cat wailing in the moonlight for me, for me, for me!!! So you think you can alter me and I’ll sit in your lap So you think you can neuter me I’ll stay inside Oh, mommy- can’t baby me, Mommy Just gotta go out, just gotta go right out and breed her Your curtains are in tatters Visitors can see You aren’t the boss of me, you cater to and cleanup after me… Everywhere the fur blows…. [/QUOTE] I was going to mention the song I sing to my dog, Maggie, SuperCaliFragilisticExpiMaggiDocious, but now it just seems silly. By the way, excellent use of “gall bladder” in a song. ---
**Author:** ![Beaucarnea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c0e974/32.png) [@Beaucarnea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beaucarnea)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/55 "2007-07-14T05:10:46Z")
Awww… you guys. Truth is, I’m utterly tone deaf, so epic tomcat rock operas are rarely sung around here out of respect for other members of the household. Rap, however, requires no pitch, tone, or melody, so I can nail this one: (Please sing along to the tune of Sir Mix Alot’s Baby Got Back) Well I sniff butts and I’ll smell your fly Registered pups can’t deny When a bitch walks in or delivery men or company dares to knock I can’t stop, but don’t call a cop Cause ya know I’m from the pound No pedigree to refine me I’m rude and I’m just so nosy Oh, puppies, I wanna dig petunias And uproot prized roses The neighborhood hounds all join me Cause that lawn you got makes me so rowdy Ooh, full time workers I’m gonna pee on your rug Well hose me and scold me cuz you know you can’t control me You been watchin’ Caesar To learn Good Dog trainin’ He’s smug, tough Grabbin’ mutts around the ruff But I’m sick of Cesar Sayin’ bad dogs need more structure Take the average mutt and pinch his neck And he’ll chase your cat So mixed breeds (yeah) Mongrels (yeah) Has your mistress got new shoes? Heck ya So chew um up and spit em out Then hide behind the couch Doggies sniff butts ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/56 "2007-07-14T05:16:07Z")
I love you, **Beaucarnea**. Please bear my children. I’m packed with male jelly. Call me. Seriously, though, that was great. You need to come up with more! ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/57 "2007-07-14T05:19:04Z")
[QUOTE=Kairos] I don’t really sing to my cats, but when one of them starts acting particularly strange (like right now, Isadora is [licking the futon frame](http://www.siliconashes.net/%7Eimbrium/wp-images/Isadora%20and%20the%20Futon.jpg)) I’ll call him or her “psycho kitten,” which is inevitably followed up by “qu’est-ce que c’est?” I never get much further than finishing out the chorus, though. [/QUOTE] I call my kitties psycho kitties, qu’est-ce que c’est? all the time too. It’s not too hard to find a cat doing something weird. Little varmints. ---
**Author:** ![Cat\_Whisperer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cat_whisperer/32/4839_2.png) [@Cat\_Whisperer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cat_Whisperer)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/58 "2007-07-14T05:20:05Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] I love you, **Beaucarnea**. Please bear my children. I’m packed with male jelly. \ [/QUOTE] Who could turn down an offer like that? ---
**Author:** ![Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/e480ec/32.png) [@Least\_Original\_User\_Name\_Ever](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Least_Original_User_Name_Ever)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 5:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/59 "2007-07-14T05:21:59Z")
[QUOTE=featherlou] Who could turn down an offer like that? [/QUOTE] I have no clue. Only a crazy gal. That’s why I worded it like that, to make it as irresistible as possible. ---
**Author:** ![Beaucarnea](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/c0e974/32.png) [@Beaucarnea](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Beaucarnea)\ **Post date:** [July 14, 2007, 6:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248/60 "2007-07-14T18:27:25Z")
[QUOTE=Least Original User Name Ever] I love you, **Beaucarnea**. Please bear my children. I’m packed with male jelly. Call me. [/QUOTE] \*\* LOUNE\*\*, I accept, and with my boyfriend’s blessing. I asked him (with a very sincere tone) to sing both songs to check for continuity errors, and he did so in an earnest manner. But by the end I nearly split my pants laughing, and he stormed out of the room. He hands me off to you with no regrets. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sing-along-with-our-pets/411248.md?page=4)