# Skald the Rhymer is annoying **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 8, 2012, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631 "2012-07-08T21:22:52Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 5
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 3:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/81 "2012-07-09T15:10:41Z")
> [@FoieGrasIsEvil](#): > > The most annoying thing about **Skald** is that he rarely rhymes, which makes him an outright liar. How many times do I have to explain about my connection to [Thomas the Rhymer](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_the_Rhymer)? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/82 "2012-07-09T15:32:30Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > How many times do I have to explain about my connection to [Thomas the Rhymer](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_the_Rhymer)? Huh. I would have guessed Thomas the Tank Engine, but okay. ---
**Author:** ![VinylTurnip](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b2d939/32.png) [@VinylTurnip](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/VinylTurnip)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/83 "2012-07-09T16:09:39Z")
“But you make _one rhyme_…” ---
**Author:** ![Loach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/loach/32/350_2.png) [@Loach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Loach)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/84 "2012-07-09T16:10:04Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > How many times do I have to explain about my connection to [Thomas the Rhymer](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_the_Rhymer)? Never would be best. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/85 "2012-07-09T17:21:55Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > I cannot tell you how often I am expected to be carrying around bundles of grain. > > Downright annoying, it is. OTOH, I’m expected to be drunk and bald and ribald. I have embraced this burden and carry it stoically. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/86 "2012-07-09T17:24:24Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > OTOH, I’m expected to be drunk and bald and ribald. > > I have embraced this burden and carry it stoically. 😛 Feeling your pain, I have directed Operations to administer the Intoxication Prevention Serum to you post haste. ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 5:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/87 "2012-07-09T17:31:32Z")
Won’t work. Aphrodite has gifted me with a wife that keeps me besotted with love. I do believe her gift would over-power even Hera’s machinations. Besides, it’s over 100º F here and I’m drinking light beer by the gallon. That stuff is an Intoxication Prevention Serum all its own. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 5:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/88 "2012-07-09T17:39:09Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > Won’t work. Aphrodite has gifted me with a wife that keeps me besotted with love. I do believe her gift would over-power even Hera’s machinations. > > Besides, it’s over 100º F here and I’m drinking light beer by the gallon. That stuff is an Intoxication Prevention Serum all its own. 😛 Do not mention the former queen of Heaven to me, sir. She was cast out of Olympus with her odious brother/husband when God assumed Her rightful place on the throne. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Second\_Stone](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/bbe5ce/32.png) [@The\_Second\_Stone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Second_Stone)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/89 "2012-07-09T17:46:16Z")
Skald is witty, sophisticated and urbane. No more schnitzengruben for Even Sven. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/90 "2012-07-09T18:00:03Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > How many times do I have to explain about my connection to [Thomas the Rhymer](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Thomas_the_Rhymer)? A scotsman also called True Thomas. Makes me eyes twitch. Was he also a True Scotsman? ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/91 "2012-07-09T18:01:56Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > A scotsman also called True Thomas. > > Makes me eyes twitch. > > Was he also a True Scotsman? I am not in charge of the Scots. Heathen bastards, the lot of them. They’re a half-step away from being Welsh, which means only one and a half steps away from being Etruscans. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/92 "2012-07-09T18:10:15Z")
Well that’s the thing, isn’t it? The Etruscans were not exterminated, they were just conquered by the Romans. Their culture vanished, which means that they were only too happy to stop being Etruscans. Either that or we could go the Kosmik route and assume they’re just hiding amongst us, ready to come out and be all Etruscany someday. ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/93 "2012-07-09T18:20:39Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > Skald is a board fixture. I have fixtures in my house. It never occurred to me to become annoyed with any of them unless they were malfunctioning. As nearly as I can figure, Skald is not malfunctioning. Though his function may be neither obvious nor practical, or even entertaining much of the time, he is operating within his design parameters. If you don’t know what function he serves, how do you know if he is working as advertised? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/94 "2012-07-09T18:26:23Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > I am not in charge of the Scots. Heathen bastards, the lot of them. They’re a half-step away from being Welsh, which means only one and a half steps away from being Etruscans. One of my grandmothers was a full-blooded Etruscan. I’m going to require you to clarify exactly what you mean by those words. Don’t think hiding behind your diety’s skirts will shield you, fool of a Graeco-Roman. I serve powers far older and darker to whom your whole pantheon is small children playing at having a tea party. ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/95 "2012-07-09T18:41:17Z")
> [@mlees](#): > > If you don’t know what function he serves, how do you know if he is working as advertised? I didn’t say his function was unknown. Only that it wasn’t obvious. He’s like a bidet to somebody from Oklahoma. ---
**Author:** ![mlees](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ba8739/32.png) [@mlees](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mlees)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/96 "2012-07-09T18:45:32Z")
> [@Scumpup](#): > > I didn’t say his function was unknown. Only that it wasn’t obvious. He’s like a bidet to somebody from Oklahoma. Skald the ass washer?? ---
**Author:** ![Scumpup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ce73a5/32.png) [@Scumpup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scumpup)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/97 "2012-07-09T18:52:01Z")
> [@mlees](#): > > Skald the ass washer?? Possibly, but that wasn’t specifically what I meant. I was using the bidet as an analogy. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/98 "2012-07-09T19:04:26Z")
Ah, he’s a _metaphorical_ asswasher. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 7:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/99 "2012-07-09T19:08:16Z")
The main thing is, even though some people probably agree that Skald is a bit annoying, the OP is far worse. That said, there’s something weird about being on this message board and finding hypotheticals that make you think to be annoying. And it’s amazing how many people seem to think a post can’t be made in fun unless it’s also funny. ---
**Author:** ![Tangent](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tangent/32/3098_2.png) [@Tangent](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tangent)\ **Post date:** [July 9, 2012, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631/100 "2012-07-09T19:19:04Z")
At least he doesn’t actually rhyme. Now _that_ would be annoying. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631.md?page=4) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/skald-the-rhymer-is-annoying/627631.md?page=6)