# Smaug survives Bilbo's quest. What does Gandalf do about it? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [January 25, 2010, 10:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432 "2010-01-25T22:32:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2010, 7:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/61 "2010-01-28T19:45:04Z")
I thought somewhere in his notes Tolkien implied Smaug and the other dragons were also Maia at the far, far beginning. Not that I’ve read any of the extended material, I just go by what I hear y’all talking about. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2010, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/62 "2010-01-28T20:55:47Z")
> [@DSYoungEsq](#): > > You can’t breed intelligent animals who talk from unintelligent animals who can’t talk. > > Ergo, the wyrms were once intelligent talking beings, turned into dragon shape. How’s THAT for a genetic engineering project!!! And, thus, they have souls for the same reason trolls do. 😉 > > My source material? My ass, of course, where else?? 😃 Hey, it worked for Balaam! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 28, 2010, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/63 "2010-01-28T23:13:35Z")
> [@DSYoungEsq](#): > > You can’t breed intelligent animals who talk from unintelligent animals who can’t talk. Sure you can. Humans and australopithecines. ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [January 29, 2010, 12:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/64 "2010-01-29T12:06:58Z")
I said _intelligent_ animals. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [January 31, 2010, 7:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/65 "2010-01-31T19:33:10Z")
> [@DSYoungEsq](#): > > I said _intelligent_ animals. 😉 Entering “+natalie +portman +hot” into a Google image search returns 1,840,000 results. Clearly we are a wise and perceptive species. ---
**Author:** ![MeDrewNotYou](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/838e76/32.png) [@MeDrewNotYou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MeDrewNotYou)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 2:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/66 "2010-02-01T02:19:13Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Entering “+natalie +portman +hot” into a Google image search returns 1,840,000 results. Clearly we are a wise and perceptive species. _Only_ 1.8M?! I think there’s something wrong with the Internet. ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 2:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/67 "2010-02-01T02:45:51Z")
> [@MeDrewNotYou](#): > > _Only_ 1.8M?! I think there’s something wrong with the Internet. Were it anyone other than Skald, I would suggest that it is because he was typing with one hand. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 4:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/68 "2010-02-01T04:17:35Z")
No response…He is obviously lulling me into a False Sense of Security while he plans some evil, nefarious revenge… Memo: Do not answer the door if Flaming Monkeys knock. ---
**Author:** ![Chronos](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chronos/32/134_2.png) [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 4:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/69 "2010-02-01T04:25:56Z")
Candygram. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 4:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/70 "2010-02-01T16:32:55Z")
> [@MeDrewNotYou](#): > > _Only_ 1.8M?! I think there’s something wrong with the Internet. I did say image search. You get more hits without such specificity. > [@carnivorousplant](#): > > No response…He is obviously lulling me into a False Sense of Security while he plans some evil, nefarious revenge… > Memo: Do not answer the door if Flaming Monkeys knock. Your abduction, sacrifice to the Dark Gods, and revival as a revenant dedicated to my service and used in a ploy to destroy New South Wales is already scheduled for 4 February. I see no reason to change my plans because of a single wisecrack. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 5:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/71 "2010-02-01T17:19:00Z")
What if he got a note from his mom? ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 6:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/72 "2010-02-01T18:15:43Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Your abduction, sacrifice to the Dark Gods, and revival as a revenant dedicated to my service and used in a ploy to destroy New South Wales is already scheduled for 4 February. Dang, I’ve scheduled a root canal on that date. Can I get back to you on this? ---
**Author:** ![Anne\_Neville](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/b9e5f3/32.png) [@Anne\_Neville](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anne_Neville)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 6:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/73 "2010-02-01T18:23:13Z")
> [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](#): > > Your abduction, sacrifice to the Dark Gods, and revival as a revenant dedicated to my service and used in a ploy to destroy New South Wales is already scheduled for 4 February. I see no reason to change my plans because of a single wisecrack. Thank you for finding somebody other than Pittsburgh to pick on. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/74 "2010-02-01T18:32:09Z")
> [@Anne\_Neville](#): > > Thank you for finding somebody other than Pittsburgh to pick on. Er…yes. Yes, that’s right. I had nothing at all to do with the Steelers’ not makiing the playoffs. Certainly I did not take any payment of gold buillion, uncut sapphires, and virgin ostriches in exchange for giving any necromantic assistance to Baltimore at Oakland that day. Yes, that is the official story and I am sticking too it. :: sips ostrich soup out of sapphire-studded bowl using impractical, solid gold spoon :: ---
**Author:** ![Satchmo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/satchmo/32/4223_2.png) [@Satchmo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satchmo)\ **Post date:** [February 1, 2010, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432/75 "2010-02-01T18:59:36Z")
Speaking about Unicorn droppings. > [@carnivorousplant](#): > > They cure wounds, and fair maidens seek them for some reason. > I can’t find any cites at the moment. Cool. I did not know that. This is why I never throw anything away. You never know what will come in handy someday. Er … not that I have any Unicorn droppings. Really. Move along, nothing to see here … [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/smaug-survives-bilbos-quest-what-does-gandalf-do-about-it/526432.md?page=3)