# Sniper Safety Tips
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [October 15, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352 "2002-10-15T16:55:36Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/1 "2002-10-15T16:55:36Z")
This was on the local news the other night. It was surreal.
[http://fff.fathom.org/pages/opalcat/sniper-safety-tips.jpg](http://fff.fathom.org/pages/opalcat/sniper-safety-tips.jpg)
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 5:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/2 "2002-10-15T17:00:02Z")
Sounds like Beirut.
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### Author:  [@Gorgon\_Heap](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gorgon_Heap)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/3 "2002-10-15T17:08:42Z")
“Keep covered while gassing up”?
Finally, the media comes clean about the drug culture.
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### Author:  [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/4 "2002-10-15T17:11:26Z")
I like the walk irregularly bit. Now I’m picturing thousands of people acting like the Minister of Silly Walks…
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/5 "2002-10-15T17:16:19Z")
“Keep covered while gassing up”?
That’s trading one kind of death for another.
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### Author:  [@lost4life](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lost4life)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/6 "2002-10-15T17:21:33Z")
So wouldn’t covered up people walking irregularly in the shadows attract suspicion? You won’t get shot but you’ll get arrested.
Maybe “Keep covered while gassing up” will be this generation’s “duck and cover.”
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### Author:  [@jackelope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jackelope)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/7 "2002-10-15T20:26:56Z")
Wow. That’s really shockingly asinine. I’d think something like “Keep covered while gassing up _and report that weird neighbor who subscribes to ‘Soldier of Fortune,’ brags about his gun collection, wears camouflage to church, calls mowing the lawn ‘securing the perimeter,’ and is often seen shirtless in his backyard shooting human-shaped targets with a bow and arrow_” would be more appropriate.
C’mon, _somebody_ has got to know who this guy is.
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### Author:  [@Eve](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eve)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/8 "2002-10-15T20:54:42Z")
I thought this was going to be one of those _Onion_ info-graphics . . . Only a matter of time . . .
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### Author:  [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/9 "2002-10-15T21:32:14Z")
I would suggest wearing some sort of walkman type device that was playing ‘Play that Funky Music’ and dancing appropriatly. If you’ve got your groove on you would be much harder to hit.
Of course for me, the sniper would be laughing too hard to get off a good shot.
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### Author:  [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 9:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/10 "2002-10-15T21:58:35Z")
Maybe this will lead to a resurgence of full-service gas stations, as people just refuse to get out of their cars. The pump jockies will have to be armored, though.
I’m surprised “Never, ever get out of your car. Drive to the Eastern Shore for a fill up”, isn’t on the list.
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### Author:  [@lieu](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lieu)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/11 "2002-10-15T23:16:55Z")
And yet another reason emerges to have a fuel-efficient vehicle.
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### Author:  [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 11:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/12 "2002-10-15T23:40:39Z")
Nobody’s seen _The In-Laws_?
“SERPENTINE!!!”
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### Author:  [@FairyChatMom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FairyChatMom)
#### Post date: [October 15, 2002, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/13 "2002-10-15T23:43:32Z")
So, anybody got a good line on body armor? How does the fashion-conscious consumer pick the right bullet-proof accessories? Does this vest clash with my chapeau??
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### Author:  [@clayton\_e](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/clayton_e)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 12:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/14 "2002-10-16T00:04:45Z")
I’d go with “Don’t go outside.” Seems like a safe bet to me.
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### Author:  [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 1:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/15 "2002-10-16T01:04:30Z")
Duck and cover.
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### Author:  [@BiblioCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BiblioCat)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/16 "2002-10-16T01:47:26Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by yojimboguy \*
> \*\*Maybe this will lead to a resurgence of full-service gas stations, as people just refuse to get out of their cars. The pump jockies will have to be armored, though.
>
> I’m surprised “Never, ever get out of your car. Drive to the Eastern Shore for a fill up”, isn’t on the list. \*\*
They’ve showed bits on the news about the Guardian Angels gassing up people’s cars for them if they’re too scared to get out and do it themselves. I don’t know if that’s funny or sad.
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### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 1:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/17 "2002-10-16T01:50:44Z")
“Walk quickly, irregularly” – like that guy in the Levi’s commercial with the spastic lower half?
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### Author:  [@John\_Harrison](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Harrison)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/18 "2002-10-16T02:05:25Z")
> [@](#):
>
> Nobody’s seen The In-Laws?
Wow, I haven’t thought about that movie in a long time.
SERPENTINE!!! That was great!
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### Author:  [@Darwins\_Finch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Darwins_Finch)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/19 "2002-10-16T02:15:27Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \*
> \*\*So, anybody got a good line on body armor? How does the fashion-conscious consumer pick the right bullet-proof accessories? Does this vest clash with my chapeau?? \*\*
Methinks your chapeau ought to be bulletproof, as well. So, no, it doesn’t clash at all!
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### Author:  [@Asylum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Asylum)
#### Post date: [October 16, 2002, 2:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sniper-safety-tips/132352/20 "2002-10-16T02:30:21Z")
> [@](#):
>
> \*Originally posted by FairyChatMom \*
> \*\*So, anybody got a good line on body armor? How does the fashion-conscious consumer pick the right bullet-proof accessories? Does this vest clash with my chapeau?? \*\*
Yeah I had the same line of thought when I saw the thread title, only I pictured Martha Stewart (sans prison jumpsuit) going “And ladies, be aware that bulletproof vests can make you look bloated, so it’s a good idea to wear baggy clothing overtop of it.”
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