# So-called beautiful celebrities you find UGLY **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [April 12, 2002, 8:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313 "2002-04-12T20:41:54Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Nacho4Sara](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/3d9bf3/32.png) [@Nacho4Sara](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nacho4Sara)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 2:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/61 "2002-04-15T02:25:38Z")
**Josh Hartnett** and **Chris Klein** : what’s that I hear? The sound of a million 13 year old girls shrieking in horror? I find both of them horrifyingly plain. I’ve dated boys better looking than them, and believe me, that ain’t saying much. Josh emotes to the same degree as the Cheezit I am about to put in my mouth. Chris acts as though he has had a full-frontal lobotomy. It also appears as if his head never resumed its normal size after he was removed from the womb with forceps. I’ve found homeless people begging for money to buy heroin to be more appealing than **James Van Der Beek**. The men of **'NSYNC**. One needs serious dental work and a hair cut, another seems to be the spawn of albino parents, a third look like every Italian average guy I went to high school with, and the last one looks like a little itty bitty midget. With poorly styled hair and a thoroughly unattractive face. The woman of 'NSYNC, **Miss Justin Timberlake** , needs to sue the doctor who botched her sex change operation. **Freddie Prinze Jr.** and **Heath Ledger** , those gods of the teen movie genre. Freddie is just not attractive - his features are downright goofy, and Heath should seriously consider taking a bath at some point in his life. **Gwyneth Paltrow** is _terrifying_. I understand that she’s tall, skinny, and gets free designer clothes, but I don’t understand how this equates beauty. **Britney Spears** and **Christina Aguilera** are certainly attractive in that over-groomed, under-dressed, highly-processed manner best represented by **Pamela Anderson** , which some people find attractive. I do not. And I question my existence in a world wherein wearing jeans or skirts low enough to show off your thong strap constitutes style worth emulating. On the other hand, I think **Ashley Judd** and **Hugh Jackman** are ungodly sexy in every concievable way and would gladly worship at the alter of either one. ---
**Author:** ![japatlgt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/df705f/32.png) [@japatlgt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/japatlgt)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/62 "2002-04-15T05:48:51Z")
Mr. BS your comment about Lucy Liu had me hanging on my chair to keep from ROTF. HOMCTKFROTF While at the risk of seeming cruel (oh what the hell) I’ve never “gotten” Julia either. Never. Pretty much the same for Angelina Jolie and Uma. Neither do I find Christina Aquilerra (sic) appealing. I have always liked Sandra Bullock and Nicole Kidman. Maybe because I’m older… ---
**Author:** ![rmbnxs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/b9e5f3/32.png) [@rmbnxs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rmbnxs)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/63 "2002-04-15T05:57:11Z")
Julia Roberts. Her mouth looks like an exit-wound. ---
**Author:** ![Koxinga](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/4af34b/32.png) [@Koxinga](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Koxinga)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 1:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/64 "2002-04-15T13:02:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lolagranola \* > Denise Richardson, who always has a vacant look on her face . . . Anyway, I swear I have no idea what is so appealing about her. Tear your attention away from her face and look about eighteen inches further down. Although my girlfriend would probably be highly critical of that aspect of Denise’s anatomy as well. She puts a premium on perkiness, and is quite disdainful of what she calls “papaya-shaped” breasts. ---
**Author:** ![vanilla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/f19dbf/32.png) [@vanilla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/vanilla)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 1:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/65 "2002-04-15T13:59:32Z")
I thought I was the only one who found Parker unattractive. Also: Julia Roberts Pamela Lee Brad Pitt Jimmy Fallon Bo Derek ---
**Author:** ![auntie\_em](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/5e9695/32.png) [@auntie\_em](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/auntie_em)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/66 "2002-04-15T14:08:07Z")
OMG! I am kuh-RACKING up ovah heah! Minnie Driver = Snoopy? And that crack about Drew Barrymore’s jaw… priceless. ::wiping tears of laughter:: What a way to start a Monday! and BTW, I can’t believe I forgot Jennifer Love Hewitt!!! ---
**Author:** ![RickJay](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/bb73d2/32.png) [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 2:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/67 "2002-04-15T14:19:16Z")
There’s a lot of celebrities listed here I admit I don’t find as beautiful as their reputations. But Sandra Bullock isn’t UGLY. She’s plain, maybe. Cameron Diaz isn’t UGLY. On the other hand: **Barbra Striesand.** - How does a woman that ugly get to kiss Robert Redford? Well, I guess that’s payback for Woody Allen getting to kiss pretty actresses. **Sarah Jessica Parker** is probably the ugliest actress working today. Holy Moses, she’s ugly. She looks like the survivor of a car accident that sent her through the windshield face first, and her body is all angles and edges. Her legs look like pantyhose stuffed with walnuts. **Gwyneth Paltrow** - The Oscar dresses are bad enough, but here’s an ugly woman with a terrible body. The fact that she’s phonier than a six-dollar bill doesn’t help, in my eyes; at least Parker seems like an honest person. **Josh Hartnett** - I’m sorry, but the guy looks _stupid._ He’s not ugly per se, he just looks like a Neanderthal with the sloping forehead and the heavy brow. I keep expecting him to scream “JOSH SMASH!” **Tea Leoni** - Worst legs in show business. **Celine Dion** - So, so frightening. She looks like a velociraptor. I would not leave my loved ones alone in her presence. **Viggo Mortenson** - Some say he’s a hottie. I say he looks just like the greasy, fithly homeless guy who’s always begging for chance in traffic on lower Spadina Ave. ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 3:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/68 "2002-04-15T15:25:59Z")
**Celine Dion.** There is a drag queen called Michel Dorion who performs at Café Entrepeau doing a Celine Dion impression. The frightening thing was, _she_ was more attractive than Celine Dion _herself._ This is not usually the case. (Does Céline still have an accent-aigu in her name? Or did she have that surgically removed with her butt fat and personality?) **Leonardo DiCaprio**. He has a fairly OK body (although I slept with two guys on Saturday night with better ones than his), but his head looks like it’s a normal head that’s been compressed to the topography of a lemon drop. Hamish suggests **Any man who’s ever made one of those Sexiest Men Alive lists.** Mel Gibson, Patrick Swayze, George Clooney. Ideally, “sexiest man alive” should not suggest someone who’s less attractive than some of the men I’ve gone out with by _mistake._ ---
**Author:** ![matt\_mcl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7ab992/32.png) [@matt\_mcl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/matt_mcl)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 3:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/69 "2002-04-15T15:28:12Z")
I forgot to mention the time when andygirl, LaurAnge and I went out for dinner and ended up at Nickel’s, a café theoretically owned by Celine. There’s a cake called “The Celine Dion,” which is a _seven-layer chocolate cake._ As LaurAnge exclaimed, “If she ate that, she’d die!” ---
**Author:** ![Mooch](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/7bcc69/32.png) [@Mooch](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mooch)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/70 "2002-04-15T15:47:07Z")
I think I stand alone, but **Madonna** looks like she came in third place in a shovel fight. ---
**Author:** ![Eats\_Crayons](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/278dde/32.png) [@Eats\_Crayons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eats_Crayons)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/71 "2002-04-15T16:10:48Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by PunditLisa \* > \*\* > I’ll second the following nominations: > > **Tom Cruise**. I liked him back when he had a crooked nose and an overbite. I’ll bet he gets pedicures, the froot loop. > > **Kevin Costner** : My doormat is more charismatic. > \*\* **Tom Cruise** grosses me out. What really put the nail in the coffin: He was recenlty on the cover of Vanity Fair (I think it was VF, not 100% sure) shirtless, standing with his hands on his hips. His chest was freshly waxed, and looked like android skin, but his armpit hairs were peaking out from under his arm. Yu-uck! **Kevin Costner** looks like a ferret (my apologies to ferrets everywhere.) ---
**Author:** ![Hail\_Ants](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/dc4da7/32.png) [@Hail\_Ants](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hail_Ants)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 10:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/72 "2002-04-15T22:25:21Z")
**Barbra Striesand!** That’s a celeb who (I guess) is considered beautiful that I think is a dog. As well as being annoying, pretentious and incredibly overrated… ---
**Author:** ![Coldfire](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@Coldfire](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Coldfire)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 10:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/73 "2002-04-15T22:44:40Z")
Without having read the OP, I’d like to add my own. Julia Roberts Demi Moore Mariah Carey Tori Spelling Courteney Cox (although she looked OK back when she used to date Alex Keaton ;)) I’m sure they were mentioned already. ---
**Author:** ![Shayna](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/shayna/32/17976_2.png) [@Shayna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shayna)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/74 "2002-04-15T23:04:48Z")
I can’t believe no one’s mentioned **Cindy Crawford**. Blech! ---
**Author:** ![PRNYouth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/9dc877/32.png) [@PRNYouth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PRNYouth)\ **Post date:** [April 15, 2002, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/75 "2002-04-15T23:32:52Z")
It gives me great pleasure to note that no one has mentioned **Christina Ricci**. It gives me pleasure not because _ **I** _ think she’s beautiful, but because perhaps it is true that **no one** finds her beautiful. It worries me that there might be someone out there who considers her attractive. For goodness’ sake, she could host the premiere of her next movie on her own gigantic forehead (and I speak as someone who appreciates a high forehead – just not _that_ high). ---
**Author:** ![missbunny](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/76d3ee/32.png) [@missbunny](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/missbunny)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/76 "2002-04-16T00:16:55Z")
I don’t feel it’s my place to say who is ugly or not, especially because I’d die if my name ever got on an UGLY list (and it did when I was a kid so I guess I am very sensitive about it) but I will say that: Penelope Cruz’s voice sounds like Mrs. Donald Duck. Angelina Jolie’s stylist should be SHOT with hollowpoints for putting her in that hideous bleached-blonde fright wig that she wears in her latest forgettable movie. I thought it was supposed to be a joke - that her character was some crazed Jayne Mansfield wannabe - but no, it appears that’s supposed to be the look of, I think, a _newscaster_? Please, someone tell me the trailers are completely misleading and she’s really a Fifties “bombshell.” She would have looked SO much better with brunette hair. I think Nicole Kidman is absolutely striking. How anyone can think she is ugly is beyond me. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 1:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/77 "2002-04-16T01:32:49Z")
MY GOD! How has no one yet mentioned Denise Richards? There’s something deeply disturbing about the way her eyes fit her face. I don’t think she’s from this planet. ---
**Author:** ![iamthewalrus\_3](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/258eb7/32.png) [@iamthewalrus\_3](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iamthewalrus_3)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 1:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/78 "2002-04-16T01:36:05Z")
MY GOD! Finally someone mentioned Denise Richards There’s something deeply disturbing about the way her eyes fail to fit her face. I don’t think she’s from this planet. Oh, and all y’all are crazy one one point; Drew Barrymore IS beautiful. ---
**Author:** ![JThunder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e95f7d/32.png) [@JThunder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JThunder)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 6:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/79 "2002-04-16T06:03:36Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Coldfire \* > \*\*Courteney Cox \*\* Blasphemer! Vile blasphemer! ---
**Author:** ![Calliope](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Calliope](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Calliope)\ **Post date:** [April 16, 2002, 6:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313/80 "2002-04-16T06:46:28Z")
Add me to the Mel Gibson list. And I also do NOT get the appeal of Harrison Ford. As for women, I find Helen Hunt and Gwyneth Paltrow to be 2 of the most over rated. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-called-beautiful-celebrities-you-find-ugly/103313.md?page=5)