# So... Darth Vader will return in Ep. VII. How d'ya think they'll do it? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [November 12, 2012, 8:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822 "2012-11-12T20:55:21Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![ExTank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/35a633/32.png) [@ExTank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ExTank)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2012, 7:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/61 "2012-11-13T19:39:03Z")
> [@Gangster\_Octopus](#): > > I hope the new Star Wars is a take-off of _The Usual Suspects_ with Darth Vader as Keyser Soze. > > “Anakin Skywalker is Darth Vader!” > “Nooooo!” > “The kind of man who can wrangle the wills of people like Padme and Obi-Wan. The kind of man who could engineer a police state, for all these years of contacts in the Imperial Senate. The kind of man who could kill all the young Jedis at the academy?. _3 Seconds of silence_ Yes, they were all found dead, lightsaber wounds to all of them. He used all of you to get him on that ship. He couldn’t get on alone and he had to pull the trigger himself to make sure he got his man. The one man that could identify him.” > “This is all bullshit.” > “He left you to stay behind and tell us he was dead. You saw him die, right? Or did you? You had to hide when Obi-Wan showed up. You heard the shot, just before the fire but you didn’t see him die.” > “I knew him. He would never -” > “He programmed you to tell us just what he wanted you to. Customs has been investigating him for years. He knew we were close. You said it yourself. Where is the political pressure coming from? Why are you being protected? It’s Vader making sure you tell us what you’re supposed to. Immunity is your reward.” > “BUT WHY ME? WHY NOT C-3PO: OR Lando: OR Chewie:? I’m a Gungan. I’m stupid. Why me?” > “Because you’re a Gungan, Jar-Jar. Because you’re stupid. Because you were weaker than them. If he’s dead, Jar Jar - if what you say is true, then it won’t matter. It was his idea to hit Alderran? Tell me the truth.” > “It was all Anakin. We followed him from the beginning. I didn’t know. I saw him die. I believe he’s dead. Christ.” If we stay true to _The Usual Suspects,_ this takes us to a very dark place. A _very_ dark place, indeed. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2012, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/62 "2012-11-13T20:35:58Z")
Jar Jar is… _gulp_ Keyser Soze?! The bumbling, the voice… It was all a ruse! ---
**Author:** ![Omniscient](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/omniscient/32/3290_2.png) [@Omniscient](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Omniscient)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2012, 8:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/63 "2012-11-13T20:43:19Z")
How about as a hologram? Some recorded message or maybe a Jedi training tool. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2012, 11:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/64 "2012-11-13T23:07:33Z")
> [@Omniscient](#): > > How about as a hologram? Some recorded message or maybe a Jedi training tool. It’d have to be a Sith training tool. But there was no indication that there were any Sith left other than Vader and Sidious in the original trilogy. Besides, doesn’t sound like Vader’s bag… “Find the Resistance and destroy their base! Now, I’ll be right back, I’ve a training hologram session at 4:00. Ready my R2 unit!” ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2012, 11:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/65 "2012-11-13T23:11:54Z")
Even if they were to clone Anakin, he’d be unmaimed by Obi. He wouldn’t need the suit. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/66 "2012-11-14T02:13:11Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > A new Sith lord will tap into the legend of the most infamous and imposing Darth in history by appropriating his name and image. I like this one; you could leave it mysterious who is actually in the Vader armor until some key point in the narrative, at which point it turns out to be the last person anyone suspected ™. ---
**Author:** ![Tom\_Scud](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/f08c70/32.png) [@Tom\_Scud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tom_Scud)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/67 "2012-11-14T02:15:37Z")
“I’m not the original Darth Vader. My actual name is Ryan. The original Vader is retired and living in Patagonia.” ---
**Author:** ![levdrakon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/49beb7/32.png) [@levdrakon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/levdrakon)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/68 "2012-11-14T02:17:00Z")
> [@Tom\_Scud](#): > > I like this one; you could leave it mysterious who is actually in the Vader armor until some key point in the narrative, at which point it turns out to be the last person anyone suspected ™. C3PO, but he only did it to get the old gang back together. ---
**Author:** ![Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/elmer_j.fudd/32/1211_2.png) [@Elmer\_J.Fudd](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elmer_J.Fudd)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/69 "2012-11-14T02:28:57Z")
> [@Wheelz](#): > > A new Sith lord will tap into the legend of the most infamous and imposing Darth in history by appropriating his name and image. > > A clone would be lame, as it was more environment than heredity that turned Anakin into Vader. But that’s probably more likely than my idea. They could use both. The clone theory would be the red herring that would get Skywalker and Co. involved for three films worth of alternating pursuit and failure. At the end of Episode IX they remove the suit from the dying Vader to find it inhabited by a little green Yoda type creature who just wanted to outdo his more famous kinsman. ---
**Author:** ![Chimera](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8e8cbc/32.png) [@Chimera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chimera)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/70 "2012-11-14T02:34:00Z")
> [@Tom\_Scud](#): > > “I’m not the original Darth Vader. My actual name is Ryan. The original Vader is retired and living in Patagonia.” “You see, the name (well, and the suit) is the key. No one would fear Darth Wesley.” ---
**Author:** ![carnivorousplant](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnivorousplant/32/3563_2.png) [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 2:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/71 "2012-11-14T02:39:36Z")
> [@chimera](#): > > “you see, the name (well, and the suit) is the key. No one would fear darth wesley.” \*\* Oh God, no!!!\*\* ---
**Author:** ![magnusblitz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b4bc9f/32.png) [@magnusblitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/magnusblitz)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 4:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/72 "2012-11-14T04:20:46Z")
> [@cmyk](#): > > They’ll also bring back Boba Fett as he’s pooped out the other end of the Sarlacc on the opposite side of Tatooine. Also already covered by the EU. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 6:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/73 "2012-11-14T06:11:58Z")
> [@magnusblitz](#): > > Also already covered by the EU. Gah, really? I never paid attention to the EU. I like my SW cannon to come from the films. That is, until Lucas took a big dump all over with the prequels. I’ll just go on record saying there’s no satisfying way to bring Vader back. Any way you dice it, it either seems a desperate excuse to keep the coolest bad guy in the films, or a really contrived and cheesy way—and I’m talking _post_-prequels. If I can see the Millenium Falcon go lightspeed with Ford and Chewie behind the wheel one more time though, I’m in the seats. ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 6:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/74 "2012-11-14T06:15:10Z")
> [@Chimera](#): > > “You see, the name (well, and the suit) is the key. No one would fear Darth Wesley.” I think you mean _Westley_. Because _Wesley_ is somebody else again. ---
**Author:** ![Declan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ecae2f/32.png) [@Declan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Declan)\ **Post date:** [November 14, 2012, 6:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/75 "2012-11-14T06:22:59Z")
Hm any chance that we are going to get Senator Jar Jar doing a dance video, gungan style 🙂 Declan ---
**Author:** ![Cumberdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Cumberdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cumberdale)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2012, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/76 "2012-11-15T04:13:15Z")
I think that is a mistake. I would like to see something like they did with _Star Trek: The Next Generation_. The episode from I think season one where they were infected with something that made their emotions go wild and Data got him some sweet Tasha. Captain Picard and Riker are reading about a similar instance and mention Captain Kirk offhandedly with no other comment. If they actually try to bring Vader back, it seems like a very lazy way to spur interest. I feel they need a new bad guy completely separate from what has already been. ---
**Author:** ![Sarabellum](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sarabellum/32/3492_2.png) [@Sarabellum](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sarabellum)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2012, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/77 "2012-11-15T16:34:52Z")
I used to be a big EU reader, years ago… and darned if I can figure out where in all that mess they can possibly wedge a trilogy’s worth of material that people would be remotely interested in, and the original actor’s remotely appropriate-looking for, without taking a giant dump on the exisiting EU stories. Which were, in theory, all “Lucas-approved” even though some of the storylines didn’t exactly mesh properly. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2012, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/78 "2012-11-15T18:50:52Z")
> [@Sarabellum1976](#): > > I used to be a big EU reader, years ago… and darned if I can figure out where in all that mess they can possibly wedge a trilogy’s worth of material that people would be remotely interested in, and the original actor’s remotely appropriate-looking for, without taking a giant dump on the exisiting EU stories. Which were, in theory, all “Lucas-approved” even though some of the storylines didn’t exactly mesh properly. Meh. The EU books always felt like glorified fan-fiction to me. Even though they’re supposedly Lucas approved, some bits I’ve heard sounded pretty uninspired and coming from a lot of different authors with no real back bone to it. I’m pretty dubious as to how much he was involved. Whatever happens with VII-IX I’d feel marginally better about it, since the Prequels were such a flop. If they make 3 more films with the original cast and even mine some ideas, characters or names from the EU, that’s fine. It seems they’re trying to go for something that _feels_ like Star Wars. Despite all the familiar set dressings, the prequels just didn’t have the same dynamic, chemistry or magic the original trilogy did. It failed mostly because of that. So yeh, SW is all about the films for me. ---
**Author:** ![cmyk](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cmyk/32/3353_2.png) [@cmyk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cmyk)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2012, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/79 "2012-11-15T19:00:43Z")
Leia and Han could always have kids. Twins even. They’d be adults by now, about the same age as Anakin. With Han as their father, and with Uncle Luke training him as a Jedi, the boy might get a little cocky with a chip on his shoulder (or maybe he lost his shoulder. His right one). Yoda might not think him suitable if he were still around, but he’s not… And who knows where that suit is. “Han, I AM your son.” “I know.” _blaster_ ---
**Author:** ![ministryman](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@ministryman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ministryman)\ **Post date:** [November 15, 2012, 7:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822/80 "2012-11-15T19:16:57Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > According to this [article,](http://www.express.co.uk/posts/view/357610/Darth-Vader-to-be-resurrected) Darth Vader, Luke and Leia’s erstwhile father, will be resurrected in the next Star Wars movie. Since Vader was killed off in ROTJ and became one with the Force like Obi-Wan and Yoda, it seems to me as if his death was final. If he does return, how do you think it will happen? It occurs to me that Palpatine could have had a clone of Anakin made and some last holdouts in the Empire could have indoctrinated a hate for the New Republic into him. Or are there any more plausible explanations for his reappearance? Assume that in order to keep balance within the force, each person must have an opposite. Yoda tends to be a “Force Shaman”, and until now, we have no idea who his opposite is. This entity resurrects the Emperor and Darth in an attempt to take one last swipe at the Alliance. Plausible? Not to a die hard fan who refuses to believe any Star Wars movies exists after V, or before IV. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-darth-vader-will-return-in-ep-vii-how-dya-think-theyll-do-it/640822.md?page=5)