# So, Did I Miss Out Big Time, Or Did I Just Dodge a Bullet?

**URL:** <https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-did-i-miss-out-big-time-or-did-i-just-dodge-a-bullet/855167>\
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\
**Created:** [June 6, 2020, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-did-i-miss-out-big-time-or-did-i-just-dodge-a-bullet/855167 "2020-06-06T20:14:51Z")\
**Posts on this page:** 1\
**Page:** 5

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**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\
**Post date:** [August 17, 2020, 4:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-did-i-miss-out-big-time-or-did-i-just-dodge-a-bullet/855167/81 "2020-08-17T04:50:44Z")

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> [@Left\_Hand\_of\_Dorkness](#):
>
> His choice to make that phone call makes it pretty clear that he’s a walking talking bullet.
> 
> Honestly it sounds like an abuser-in-grooming: insult you and knock down your boundaries. Had you been less self-confident, you might have apologized and offered to call him more often, and he would’ve gotten the message that he could continue ignoring your boundaries.

Totally this. And I am fascinated by the growing dynamic in the thread. Why are so many men coming in to defend his behavior, and purposefully misstate the boundaries she set? How many times have these “helpers” convinced me that my instincts and boundaries were out of line, resulting in months of abusive relationships?

You did great, Cats, don’t change a thing. Up front honesty and the willingness to walk away are the key to a happy social life.

As for why you are suddenly giving out your number? It may be that we are all a bit more aware of our loneliness these days. The lockdowns and life threats of COVID-19 have placed a new perspective on single life, for sure.

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