# So does anyone remember... (warning: not for the weak of heart) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 3, 2001, 3:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220 "2001-05-03T15:27:12Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/41 "2001-05-05T05:28:43Z")
When I mentioned this to my wife, she elbowed me in the ribs. I thought she was trying to disarm my wit. Turns out, she only wanted to warn me that others might think my sense of humour is sick. After all, forewarned is forearmed. ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 2:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/42 "2001-05-05T14:50:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor \* > Does anybody here have the nerve to E-mail this chopped-chick & find out what she might have to say about her hobby? > \*\*jarbabyj! \*\*You got a winning way with words. You contact her. Get her onto the SDMB. She could start her own thread. I would email her in a second, but as many puns as I’ve thrown through here, I would be very polite, and I probably wouldn’t post what she told me unless she gave permission. Because really, she seems a little **off** jarbaby ---
**Author:** ![PunditLisa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/4af34b/32.png) [@PunditLisa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/PunditLisa)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/43 "2001-05-05T14:55:42Z")
I just wanted you all to know that I don’t find any of your sick, sick jokes to be humerus. ---
**Author:** ![pluto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/f08c70/32.png) [@pluto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pluto)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 5:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/44 "2001-05-05T17:46:22Z")
Did you hear about the lady that backed into the airplane propeller? Disaster! ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 7:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/45 "2001-05-05T19:50:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by pluto \* > \*\*Did you hear about the lady that backed into the airplane propeller? > > Disaster! \*\* Don’t try to butt in here with your underhanded jokes. ---
**Author:** ![wring](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/838e76/32.png) [@wring](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wring)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 9:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/46 "2001-05-05T21:39:08Z")
can some one help me please? I’m having a hard time fingering this one out. Thumbthing should be done about it. Maybe we should dig-it a hole? Put another nail on the coffin? Make a joint resolution to stop? ---
**Author:** ![SpinneZiege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@SpinneZiege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpinneZiege)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/47 "2001-05-05T22:20:48Z")
Wow, considering the last thread we had about this, I’m surprised we don’t have any jokes about the brand of hooks this woman says about ten thousand times on her site. I guess I’ll take my BIG BOOK OF TWIN BODY-POWERED PROSTHESES WITH DORRANCE #5X STAINLESS STEEL HOOKS JOKES elsewhere, then. Umm, this thing is heavy. Could someone give me a hand? (Hey, I tried to make this funny. How about a hand for trying?.. ok i’ll stop now) ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2001, 11:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/48 "2001-05-05T23:35:57Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by SpinneZiege \* > > (Hey, I tried to make this funny. How about a hand for trying?.. ok i’ll stop now) I’ve got to hand it to you Spinne, that’s some funny stuff there. I can’t put my finger on it, but there’s something about your wit that’s extra sharp ---
**Author:** ![SpinneZiege](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/9e8a1a/32.png) [@SpinneZiege](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpinneZiege)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/49 "2001-05-06T01:44:25Z")
😃 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/50 "2001-05-06T02:01:42Z")
Most of you need to be backhanded! What an underhanded thing to do! _in all seriousness, could this be a joke? I wonder if we could submit it for Weird Earls?_ I wonder how they could have sex after she’s an amputee? Would she have special accessories for handjobs? ---
**Author:** ![JillGat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc29f/32.png) [@JillGat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JillGat)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/51 "2001-05-06T04:01:47Z")
Man, I got here too late. I wanted to use the line “you can’t shoot people who are unarmed!” but it was basically taken. All of my jokes were taken. I’m, well, I’m just stumped. ---
**Author:** ![JillGat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc29f/32.png) [@JillGat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JillGat)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/52 "2001-05-06T04:03:29Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by xizor \* > \*\*I have only one question: > > What is going to happen after she gets her wish? I mean, that will make her happy, right? > > So she will be happy and she’ll know it… \*\* Oh god, that was the best. ---
**Author:** ![Jus\_lookin\_Round](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/a6a055/32.png) [@Jus\_lookin\_Round](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jus_lookin_Round)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 7:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/53 "2001-05-06T07:53:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*\* > I wonder how they could have sex after she’s an amputee? > Would she have special accessories for handjobs? > > \*\* No more “Fists of Fury” for the handless maiden? What **will** she do with his love handles? ---
**Author:** ![Emperor\_Penguin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/c2a13f/32.png) [@Emperor\_Penguin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Emperor_Penguin)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/54 "2001-05-06T08:09:15Z")
Okay people, get a grip and stop with the cutting remarks. We need to get this situation under hand. [sub]I don’t want to fall to pieces, but I have a feeling we’re all going to hell in a hand basket for this thread[/sub] ---
**Author:** ![tiny\_ham](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a183cd/32.png) [@tiny\_ham](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tiny_ham)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2001, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/55 "2001-05-06T13:44:21Z")
Never fear. I assume that before we know it a mod will sweep in and close this thread with the swift hand of justice that they’re known for. ---
**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2001, 3:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/56 "2001-05-07T03:57:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by jarbabyj \* > \*\*Never fear. I assume that before we know it a mod will sweep in and close this thread with the swift hand of justice that they’re known for. \*\* And if they so much as THINK about it I’ll go mano-a-mano with 'em all… BTW, d’ya suppose she works for Allstate? ---
**Author:** ![OxyMoron](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/e9a140/32.png) [@OxyMoron](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OxyMoron)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2001, 4:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/57 "2001-05-07T04:13:02Z")
Since no SDMB thread is complete without a reference to the works of Tom Lehrer, I offer the following two stanzas for your delectation (sung to a gentle waltz): \*I hold your hand in mine, dear, I press it to my lips. I take a healthy bite From your dainty fingertips. My joy would be complete, dear, If you were only here, But still I keep your hand As a precious souvenir.\* ---
**Author:** ![Bboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7ea924/32.png) [@Bboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bboy)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2001, 5:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/58 "2001-05-07T05:04:54Z")
The whole idea seems pointless to me. Removing a perfectly good set of hands…that’s totally beyond the radius of my comprehension. I just can’t grasp it. Hmmm…Maybe she’ll be the body modification artist formerly known as ‘Prints’. ---
**Author:** ![JillGat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9fc29f/32.png) [@JillGat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JillGat)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2001, 5:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/59 "2001-05-07T05:28:26Z")
This is the only thread handy hasn’t posted to. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2001, 3:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220/60 "2001-05-07T15:17:32Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Guinastasia \* > \*\*I wonder how they could have sex after she’s an amputee? > Would she have special accessories for handjobs? > \*\* Would you really want a woman who is willing to chop off her own arms to be anywhere near your genitals? I wouldn’t. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-does-anyone-remember-warning-not-for-the-weak-of-heart/64220.md?page=4)