# So go figure... I'm gay. **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [May 11, 2005, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463 "2005-05-11T21:44:20Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Ethilrist](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ethilrist/32/4604_2.png) [@Ethilrist](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ethilrist)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 2:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/61 "2005-05-12T14:51:51Z")
Say. You don’t… _wax_ anything, do you? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/62 "2005-05-12T14:55:59Z")
> [@Balle\_M](#): > > I’d get rid of the ring and, although I’m sure they look _great_ on you, the assless chaps may be sending the wrong message. Next you’ll be telling me to lose the handlebar mustache, the leather vest and the Harley. ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 2:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/63 "2005-05-12T14:57:12Z")
> [@Ethilrist](#): > > Say. You don’t… _wax_ anything, do you? My skis. Sometimes my bicycle chain. But that’s it, I swear! ---
**Author:** ![silenus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/silenus/32/166_2.png) [@silenus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/silenus)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/64 "2005-05-12T15:07:04Z")
So…how _often_ do you “wax your bicycle chain?” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/65 "2005-05-12T15:12:58Z")
> [@silenus](#): > > So…how _often_ do you “wax your bicycle chain?” 😃 Just before the start of riding season and then as needed depending on how much… Hey! I know what you’re trying to do, you bastard!!! ---
**Author:** ![Velma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/85e7bf/32.png) [@Velma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Velma)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/66 "2005-05-12T15:18:24Z")
Around my work people think you’re gay if you go to someplace ‘foufy, like Panera Bread.’ I guess real men eat at Arby’s then? ---
**Author:** ![QuickSilver](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/quicksilver/32/7832_2.png) [@QuickSilver](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/QuickSilver)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/67 "2005-05-12T15:20:40Z")
> [@Velma](#): > > Around my work people think you’re gay if you go to someplace ‘foufy, like Panera Bread.’ I guess real men eat at Arby’s then? Nope. Real mean catch and strangle their food with their bare hands. They don’t even wash them first. ---
**Author:** ![Uvula\_Donor](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/e19adc/32.png) [@Uvula\_Donor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uvula_Donor)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/68 "2005-05-12T15:33:15Z")
> [@Velma](#): > > I guess real men eat at Arby’s then? I hear Arby’s Oven Mitt is into fisting. ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Nemo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/little_nemo/32/3120_2.png) [@Little\_Nemo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Nemo)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/69 "2005-05-12T15:43:03Z")
Drop the following into workplace conversations and your heterosexual reputation will be restored: “Anyone else go to the AC/DC concert last night? Dude, those guys ROCK!” “Sorry if I seem tired today. I was up all last night watching Skinemax.” “Who’s up for a belching contest?” “Did you get a chance to check out the ass on that new intern?” IMPORTANT NOTE - the last one will not work as intended if the new intern is a man ---
**Author:** ![Scott\_Plaid](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/258eb7/32.png) [@Scott\_Plaid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scott_Plaid)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/70 "2005-05-12T15:48:21Z")
> [@Little Nemo](#): > > Drop the following into workplace conversations and your heterosexual reputation will be restored: > > “Anyone else go to the AC/DC concert last night? Dude, those guys ROCK!” > > IMPORTANT NOTE - the last one will not work as intended if the new intern is a man Did…did you just say Ac/Dc? Are you Bi? 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Succubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/4491bb/32.png) [@Succubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Succubus)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 4:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/71 "2005-05-12T16:35:07Z")
> [@](#): > > **QuickSilver** : > But what I’m hearing you all say is… lose the thumb ring. Yes? Definately lose the ring… If it has some sort of sentimental value to you, put it on a chain and wear it around your neck… It’s less gay that way… 😛 ---
**Author:** ![5que](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/5/3bc359/32.png) [@5que](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/5que)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/72 "2005-05-12T16:49:01Z")
> [@QuickSilver](#): > > Next you’ll be telling me to lose the handlebar mustache, the leather vest and the Harley. My handlebar mustache makes me look _Deadwood_ mean. I think. Oh, and give the aforementioned definition of a lesbian, I was one in high school, college, 1 year of graduate school, and 8 years after my divorce. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/73 "2005-05-12T17:01:43Z")
> [@Velma](#): > > Around my work people think you’re gay if you go to someplace ‘foufy, like Panera Bread.’ I guess real men eat at Arby’s then? Real men eat at the Y. _ducks_ ---
**Author:** ![plnnr](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/7ea924/32.png) [@plnnr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/plnnr)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/74 "2005-05-12T17:10:07Z")
> [@Uncommon Sense](#): > > Real men eat at the Y. > > _ducks_ Steam room or sauna? It can really make a difference, depending on the day of the week. ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/75 "2005-05-12T17:16:59Z")
> [@Uncommon Sense](#): > > Real men eat at the Y. > > _ducks_ So lesbians are real men, or are real men really lesbians? ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/76 "2005-05-12T17:17:08Z")
> [@plnnr](#): > > Steam room or sauna? It can really make a difference, depending on the day of the week. I thought the menu only changed once a month. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/77 "2005-05-12T17:18:20Z")
> [@RTFirefly](#): > > So lesbians are real men, or are real men really lesbians? Dunno, I’m a lesbian trapped in a man’s body. Go figure. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 5:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/78 "2005-05-12T17:44:15Z")
> [@Uncommon Sense](#): > > I thought the menu only changed once a month. Was this in response to something about what lesbians eat? ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/79 "2005-05-12T18:03:17Z")
> [@Trunk](#): > > Was this in response to something about what lesbians eat? Yes. Well actully lesbians and straight guys. Hint: Eating at the Y is slang for, you know, performing cunnilingus. ---
**Author:** ![Trunk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/87869e/32.png) [@Trunk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Trunk)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2005, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463/80 "2005-05-12T18:09:55Z")
> [@Uncommon Sense](#): > > Yes. Well actully lesbians and straight guys. > > Hint: Eating at the Y is slang for, you know, performing cunnilingus. I know. I got sidetracked. I didn’t know if you were talking about the specials at the men’s sauna or the menu at the ‘Y’. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-go-figure-im-gay/303463.md?page=5)