# So has anyone here ever attended a "cuddle party"? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 16, 2009, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205 "2009-07-16T10:19:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![CyclopticXander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@CyclopticXander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CyclopticXander)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 10:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/1 "2009-07-16T10:19:59Z")
Here’s the overview [Cuddle party - Wikipedia](http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Cuddle_party) I’m just now finding out about this phenomenon, but it sounds oddly appealing. I’m a natural cuddle bug, but there aren’t a lot of opportunities in our society outside of a sexual or relationship context. Can such an experiment actually work without attracting all forms of creepiness and abuse? I doubt I’ll ever have the perfect mix of opportunity and will to participate. Really I’d like some feedback from someone who’s experienced this first hand, until then…cuddle montage! [http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yoyp\_vppjRA&feature=channel\_page](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Yoyp_vppjRA&feature=channel_page) ---
**Author:** ![GuanoLad](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guanolad/32/42_2.png) [@GuanoLad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GuanoLad)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 11:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/2 "2009-07-16T11:35:08Z")
I don’t even like social hugs. ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 1:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/3 "2009-07-16T13:36:39Z")
No, it sounds stupid. ---
**Author:** ![Khadaji](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/9e8a1a/32.png) [@Khadaji](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khadaji)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 1:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/4 "2009-07-16T13:47:39Z")
I didn’t go to the link, but I suspect that I am of an age that is past the target. But one thing I miss about college was, I used to get hugged regularly from women. It was common on the campus I was on. I miss sex too, but I do miss hugging. ---
**Author:** ![Cumberdale](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/8c91f0/32.png) [@Cumberdale](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cumberdale)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/5 "2009-07-16T14:12:17Z")
I saw the Pen & Teller BS episode where they discussed it. It seems silly and something whiney new age types would get into. ---
**Author:** ![MsWhatsit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/eb8c5e/32.png) [@MsWhatsit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MsWhatsit)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/6 "2009-07-16T14:16:14Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > No, it sounds stupid. Yep. ---
**Author:** ![StGermain](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/stgermain/32/2868_2.png) [@StGermain](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/StGermain)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/7 "2009-07-16T14:33:34Z")
I can barely stand being hugged by family. The idea of being touched by people unconnected to me makes my skin crawl. StG ---
**Author:** ![Casserole](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/b77776/32.png) [@Casserole](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casserole)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/8 "2009-07-16T14:43:28Z")
I was introduced to this concept in a Law & Order episode… or maybe it was an episode of CSI. Definitely put a damper on it. The concept is interesting enough that I looked it up on Wikipedia right away. heh. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/9 "2009-07-16T14:54:17Z")
> [@CyclopticXander](#): > > Can such an experiment actually work without attracting all forms of creepiness and abuse? If it is, what’s the appeal anyway? I haven’t had sex with people I barely know, but I see the draw. 😉 But just hugs? I thought the only thing that made them worthwhile was the fact that they came from people you’re close to. When the hugs are socially required I usually find them annoying. I do think it’s really interesting to see how much that kind of random personal contact means to some people, though. I did an actors’ workshop about a year ago and some of the participants were moved to tears by basic massages and similar physical contact. It did make me wonder how locked out some people feel. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 2:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/10 "2009-07-16T14:55:12Z")
I only like being hugged by people I know. The “free hug” guy at Union Square makes my skin crawl. Nothing personal, just prefer to keep my contact with people I don’t know to hand shakes. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/11 "2009-07-16T15:04:54Z")
I read the wiki link. It sounds like the stupidest thing ever. When my wife and I cuddle, we get horny. And when we get horny, we fuck. They’d never let us back in the place. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/12 "2009-07-16T15:06:49Z")
> [@corkboard](#): > > I read the wiki link. It sounds like the stupidest thing ever. > > When my wife and I cuddle, we get horny. And when we get horny, we fuck. > > They’d never let us back in the place. The cuddle lifeguard would be blowing his whistle and everything. They really need to spoof these things in the mass media. ---
**Author:** ![Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e99b99/32.png) [@Diogenes\_the\_Cynic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Diogenes_the_Cynic)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/13 "2009-07-16T15:13:24Z")
I remember another thread about this a year or two ago. It sounded squicky to me then, and it still does. Nerf sex for arrested misfits that can’t get dates. Probably a sausage fest as well. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/14 "2009-07-16T15:26:37Z")
Heheh. Nerf sex. ---
**Author:** ![tdn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/94ad74/32.png) [@tdn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tdn)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/15 "2009-07-16T15:46:04Z")
It sounds great, but only if it’s me and a bunch of supermodels. The no sex rule would have to go, though. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Understander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/3da27b/32.png) [@The\_Understander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Understander)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 3:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/16 "2009-07-16T15:51:35Z")
An orgy for those who lack the courage of their [del]predilections[/del] convictions. No thanks! ---
**Author:** ![msmith537](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/d9b06d/32.png) [@msmith537](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/msmith537)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 5:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/17 "2009-07-16T17:27:12Z")
> [@Freudian\_Slit](#): > > I only like being hugged by people I know. The “free hug” guy at Union Square makes my skin crawl. Nothing personal, just prefer to keep my contact with people I don’t know to hand shakes. I never saw that guy. If I did, I think I might be willing to give him a pair of fives if he tried to hug me. ---
**Author:** ![Freudian\_Slit](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5daacb/32.png) [@Freudian\_Slit](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Freudian_Slit)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 5:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/18 "2009-07-16T17:29:36Z")
> [@msmith537](#): > > I never saw that guy. If I did, I think I might be willing to give him a pair of fives if he tried to hug me. Well, I don’t know if he’s always there but there was a guy holding a cardboard sign that said that last time I was hanging out there. And another guy who was holding a sign that said Free Advice. (Who’s advice?) ---
**Author:** ![CyclopticXander](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/59ef9b/32.png) [@CyclopticXander](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CyclopticXander)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/19 "2009-07-16T17:43:30Z")
So obviously this idea has limited appeal:) I certainly understand how it can sound unappealing. Most people will either be grossed out by it or not see the point. I think that the draw is a kind of regression, a reminder of a simpler, more youthful, and less guarded time when you could just lay around in your pajamas, recline on your friends, and chat the night away. It just feels good. Everyone may not have had those experiences or want to relive them if they did, but some of us do. I’ve never been around such a thing, in fact it seems pretty counter to everything I know about how we interact in the adult world. But it’s certainly not “stupid” or “new agey”, at least not the way I’m imagining it. It’s just what it is. Once again though, I kinda doubt it can be pulled off successfully with any consistency. I also feel awkward with social hugs and such, but ultimately it’s because we have conditioned ourselves to have a certain amount of awkwardness with casual affection. I’m not even saying that’s a bad thing, but sometimes the kid in me wonders. ---
**Author:** ![corkboard](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/e9bcb4/32.png) [@corkboard](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/corkboard)\ **Post date:** [July 16, 2009, 5:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205/20 "2009-07-16T17:43:57Z")
We were at the Toys R Us in Times Square with the kids about a month ago and when we exited there were two guys holding “FREE HUGS” signs. They were shirtless, and it was about in the mid-80’s that day, so they were covered with a thin sheen of sweat. I can’t imagine they got many takers. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-has-anyone-here-ever-attended-a-cuddle-party/503205.md?page=2)