# So I guess we went and had a baby? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 23, 2014, 3:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813 "2014-07-23T03:06:02Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 13\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![RivkahChaya](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rivkahchaya/32/8919_2.png) [@RivkahChaya](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RivkahChaya)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 6:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/141 "2014-09-04T06:32:26Z")
Another financial option, if he isn’t gaining weight, and must have formula, might possibly be insurance. I babysat for a family whose children were adopted. The first daughter thrived on the regular stuff from the store, but the second was both lactose intolerant, and allergic to soy. She ended up at the children’s hospital on donor milk for a few days, before they got her on elemental formula, which you can’t get without a prescription, so their insurance paid for it. It was really fould smelling, but the baby ate it until she was about six months old. At that point, the parents started making their own, with goat’s milk, rice starch, Karo syrup, and liquid vitamins (IIRC-- I only watched once). Now, they’d probably be able to give her lactose-free formula, but this was like 1981. Another family I knew had formula paid for by insurance because the mother had post-partum complications that prevented her from nursing. It’s worth asking. I think mainly you need a doctor’s order to feed x-amount of formula per day. ---
**Author:** ![Malthus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/85f322/32.png) [@Malthus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Malthus)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/142 "2014-09-04T13:09:51Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > I have to say, previously I would NEVER have said anything to a woman who was formula feeding but I have to admit I had an internal judgment. Because, you know, the vast majority of women could breastfeed if they white knuckled it through the first few weeks, or had appropriate support, or whatever. And that might be true. Probably is true. And beforehand I gave lip service to “you do whatever is best for your own family” but I don’t know that I really bought into it. I have been truly and absolutely humbled. > > And if ANY of them bitches has the nerve to speak to me about it, believe you me I am prepared and will exact vengeance. > > (At the same time you have to remember that I’m the one who went to the babywearing group’s meeting last week for help, and they were SUPER helpful, but I was deeply embarrassed about pulling out a bottle there. Even though it was breastmilk in the bottle. Because you want to not care about what people think, but you totally do. And no, nobody said anything. And yes, they were all really, really nice. And helpful. But I still felt I’d somehow brought shame on famiry. And then because I’m socially awkward I left early and didn’t make any mom friends which is half the reason I went. But anyway, they were really nice and really helpful. Gah.) I think children are specifically designed by nature to teach judgmental people humility.\* \*Except for my kid, who is of course perfect in every way. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/143 "2014-09-04T13:20:02Z")
> [@Zsofia](#): > > And if ANY of them bitches has the nerve to speak to me about it, believe you me I am prepared and will exact vengeance. Don’t be surprised when you want to deface the “breast is best” ads at the bus stop or get kicked off every Mommy Board in existence for telling the breast nazis to SHUT UP. Myself, I thought back when my teens were little that we’d reached critical mass…the people that are going to at least try to breastfeed are going to, and PSAs and breast propaganda aren’t going to bring the ones who won’t at least try along. So what it ends up doing is help those that want to and it doesn’t work out feel miserable - when you have someone who is already suffering from PND, we really don’t need to add “failure and guilt” on top of it for the small benefits of breastmilk. (In addition to my adopted son, my daughter is bio and took a week to start nursing - and I had raging PND - PND killed my grandmother - so it wasn’t a great time). ---
**Author:** ![Lorene89095](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/a8b319/32.png) [@Lorene89095](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lorene89095)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/144 "2014-09-04T15:39:32Z")
What you want is a happy,healthy baby. How you get there doesn’t matter. ---
**Author:** ![SmellMyWort](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ea5d25/32.png) [@SmellMyWort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SmellMyWort)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/145 "2014-09-04T17:28:14Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#): > > My oldest is adopted and therefore wasn’t breastfed - been there with the guilt and the public shaming and still have the emotional scarring. He’s sixteen and … sixteen (he’s just emerging from the larval stage, I hope), but healthy and intelligent. And yes, formula is really expensive. If you are a Costco, BJs or Sams Club member, check them out - sometimes the formula there is cheapest. It does however, pass - the diaper and formula stage. They find other ways to drain your wallet, but those go away. (Sixteen it seems to be the former diaper and formula bill in frozen pizza - at 13 it was shoes - he outgrew shoes every few weeks, soon - car insurance). Costco’s Kirkland formula is definitely way cheaper than Enfamil or whatever name brand one they sell there. Nearly half-price if I remember correctly. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 5:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/146 "2014-09-04T17:41:05Z")
> [@Lorene89095](#): > > What you want is a happy,healthy baby. How you get there doesn’t matter. Well, eventually you’re supposed to start measuring their height rather than their length… ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 9:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/147 "2014-09-04T21:02:00Z")
We don’t have a Costco, but the Target store brand stuff is about half what the name brand is. I guess I need to investigate if Sams has a good enough deal on it to a) justify a membership, and b) make me go there, ugh. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/148 "2014-09-04T22:33:35Z")
Zsofia, between diapers and formula, I found a Sam’s Club membership more than worth it. ---
**Author:** ![Dangerosa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/22d042/32.png) [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/149 "2014-09-04T22:40:04Z")
> [@Sattua](#): > > Zsofia, between diapers and formula, I found a Sam’s Club membership more than worth it. And if you have a friend or relative - get what we call a “Costco Buddy” in your case a “Sam’s Buddy” - one membership - but you split the bag of avocados or ten pounds of hamburger…Warehouse stores aren’t a great deal on everything, but eventually you will think huge boxes of fruit snacks and tubs of animal crackers justify the membership. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 4, 2014, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/150 "2014-09-04T23:13:59Z")
The thing is, going to Sam’s is just incredibly unpleasant. It’s a particularly bad parking lot in a particularly bad shopping center, it’s Evil Empire (same shopping center as Hobby Lobby and Chik Fil A, too) and just a really unpleasant experience. It would have to save us a TON of money to make it worthwhile. (And we’re doing good with the cloth diapers so that’s not an added discount there.). It’s a tough math to do. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Vorlon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@The\_Vorlon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Vorlon)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/151 "2014-09-05T00:07:52Z")
In our house, pacifiers were known as “Binkies” The couch is still disgorging binkies. The child is 18, 19 in two weeks. ---
**Author:** ![Zsofia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/7bcc69/32.png) [@Zsofia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zsofia)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 2:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/152 "2014-09-05T02:44:19Z")
You know, when I was a kid I remember a very early Christmas where we had tinsel on the tree. I never remember us doing it after that. We moved from that house to a little house for a while, and then a condo, and then a bigger house, and then a few days after this damned nightmare C-section my parents moved into the old folks home. I opened their piano bench today and found an errant piece of tinsel. ---
**Author:** ![Lacunae\_Matata](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lacunae\_Matata](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lacunae_Matata)\ **Post date:** [September 5, 2014, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813/153 "2014-09-05T03:03:22Z")
Easter grass. Same. I’ve never once allowed it in my house, and I still average finding a strand or two each year. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-guess-we-went-and-had-a-baby/693813.md?page=7)