# So I Seem To Have Voluntarily Become Homeless **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [January 15, 2014, 4:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853 "2014-01-15T04:55:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Zebra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/c0e974/32.png) [@Zebra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zebra)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 7:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/41 "2014-01-16T19:30:37Z")
Hang in there man. ---
**Author:** ![Strain\_of\_Thought](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Strain\_of\_Thought](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strain_of_Thought)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/42 "2014-01-16T20:04:26Z")
Okay, today is not going so well. I slept really poorly last night and I’m in kind of a daze. I woke up really depressed, but managed to pull myself together and go back to G.R.A.C.E. for the job postings I had seen there the previous day but forgotten to grab on my way out. For awhile that got me focused again, so I went back to the library and set up and went through the postings in detail. Unfortunately they weren’t as promising as they looked the previous day, but that’s not saying much because they looked too good to be true then; they were postings printed off from craigslist, but I only realized when I got a closer look at them that many of them have no contact information in the post- they’re basically useless, if you can’t find the corresponding post on craigslist itself. A few of the others have addresses and ask for applications in person and such; those look more legitimate. At any rate, this got me started looking through craigslist, which was kind of stupid because that’s a good way to burn myself out really fast. I will reiterate, my education, work experience, and work history are all crap, so reading job postings for me (and I get that I am not the only human being to feel this to some extent) is like reading just the words NOT GOOD ENOUGH over and over and over and over. What’s much more troubling is that I’m drowsy and I’m having trouble making simple decisions. I hadn’t slept well for weeks, and the last two nights in the car were pretty bad. Last night I definitely got into scary territory before I decided to just shut everything off and go to bed. Today when I tried to do replies for this thread my eyes just glazed over. I’m just, typing out stream of conscious right now. Having to formulate thoughts into words other people can understand helps me think more clearly. I have to do something about sleep; I feel exhausted and that makes me scared to go look for work. It’s increasingly looking like I am going to have to look at a shelter, just to keep my energy up. Also, I still haven’t made any progress on my medication, which could definitely be contributing to my fugue. The medicine I take is an SSRI, but it’s prescribed by my gastroenterologist for digestive health. That doesn’t mean it’s not working as an antidepressant at the same time, but I’d long ago given up on ever getting psychiatric medication from a competent psychiatrist; I have been through their sausage factory and I won’t be a guinea pig again. The gut-and-butt doctor was way more serious about paying attention to side affects and determining whether or not the drug had an actual positive effect on me. Okay, rambling again. Need to stop. I am going to open up my wallet and look for my medicaid card, and go from their looking for a medicaid number to call. Gonna work on pills stuff for thirty minutes and then stop and see where I am. ---
**Author:** ![Maastricht](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/a88e57/32.png) [@Maastricht](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Maastricht)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/43 "2014-01-16T20:52:45Z")
Cant you meet your Sensible Uncle in a bar somewhere and have him give you your meds and stuff? You wouldnt have to meet Crazy Aunt that way. It sounds like you really need your meds. ---
**Author:** ![Strain\_of\_Thought](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Strain\_of\_Thought](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strain_of_Thought)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 9:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/44 "2014-01-16T21:26:52Z")
Okay, talked to a Medicaid person on phone. Medicaid is much much more willing to talk about itself these days than it was when I first got it. Apparently things have been improving or something? There are so many sources of help that I’d completely written off long ago that seem to have maybe stopped being complete wastes of time at some point in the past five years. Yes yes where was I oh yeah okay MAYBE, maybe, medicaid will cover my prescription. But to do so I have to go back to the pharmacy and re-run a refill with both insurance cards at the same time. I called the pharmacy and they were happy to look up my prescription by my name, so now I need to drive over there and see what they can do. New problem: my phone, which as I think I said has been switched over to my family’s group account, is running out of minutes from all this calling. And the phone company won’t talk to me any more. Not sure what I can do about this. Also, I nearly had a panic attack when I thought I had lost my phone’s charger. Found it again in a different pouch in my bag. Packing up. Going to the pharmacy. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [January 16, 2014, 10:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/45 "2014-01-16T22:20:26Z")
Do you have spare $$ to get an inexpensive pre-paid phone? I’m glad you’re working on communicating with Medicaid and with your pharmacy. It doesn’t matter \*\*\*why \*\*\*you’re taking them – suddenly going cold turkey off SSRIs is known to cause problematic side effects like exhaustion, trouble sleeping, and other such issues that, to be perfectly honest, are probably going to be a big problem for you right now anyway. I mean, you’re sleeping in the cold in your car, so of course you might have trouble sleeping, even without Rx side effects. (Or, well, lack-of-Rx side effects.) All of which is to say: I’m glad you’re taking steps to get some aspects of your shit together. Keep reaching out for help – that’s exactly what it’s there for. To help. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 2:02am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/46 "2014-01-17T02:02:57Z")
I’ve read everything you have written and I want to tell you that I wish you luck and that I think that you are very brave. I agree with everyone else, getting your meds should be your first priority. Sleeping in a car isn’t very comfortable and is kinda scary. Do you have blankets? Its possible that the place that gave you the clothes could give you some. That would probably help. Are you small enough to sleep curled up in the back seat? When I was living in my car, I slept better when I could lay on a flat surface instead of a reclined seat. If you park next to a wall that has been sun soaked all day, your car will stay warmer. Do your best to keep your car neat and clean, if you don’t look like you are living in your car, people are more willing to ignore a car parked overnight. Many grocery stores have marked down produce. Its bruised and/or ready to turn, but if you buy it and eat it the same day, its a way to save money. Packaged foods are all well and good, but sometimes you just gotta eat an apple. Best of luck to you. I’m sending a whole bunch of good wishes your way. ---
**Author:** ![FeAudrey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/7feea3/32.png) [@FeAudrey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FeAudrey)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 5:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/47 "2014-01-17T05:31:39Z")
You can get a free cellphone with a monthly allocation of minutes if you receive any kind of public aid, including SSI, Medicaid, and food stamps. ---
**Author:** ![Strain\_of\_Thought](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Strain\_of\_Thought](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strain_of_Thought)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 7:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/48 "2014-01-17T07:35:30Z")
Okay things are waaaaay better now! Yay! Got to the pharmacy, then before going in I thought to check the Health Savings Account which is supposed to cover the huge deductible on my Uncle’s company’s plan as part of a shell game to get the best overall rates in comprehensive care. It was borked at the beginning of the year and I already had paid $500 or so out of pocket for a medical thingamiajig earlier in the month because of it. Anyway, holy crap they fixed it and it has the $3000 and some change that it was supposed to have on Jan 1st. So that’s good! I don’t want to touch it, and it’s only for paying deductible charges anyway, but it’s nice to know I still have access to it for awhile, especially in a life-threatening emergency. So, knowing I had some recourse anyway, I went in to the pharmacy, and after a little trouble convincing the pharmacist behind the counter that I had an actual issue that required attention, they were able to re-run my prescription on the medicaid card, and it was covered entirely. It only took them 15 minutes or so to fill it; I gotta say, it really, really cheered me up. It also reminded me of why I had felt that I had to walk out if I was going to leave at all: my Medicaid coverage is a great example of a resource I have access to that my Aunt & Uncle had discouraged me from using in favor of something that was under their control. Getting my medicine in a way that didn’t depend on them felt really, really good. Anyway I popped two pills immediately; two before bed is my usual dosage, and I’m going to take that tonight again. I was a little lost after that; I’d been so focused on the medicine I didn’t have a thought for what came next if I actually got it. I ended up driving south to the only thrift store in the area I knew of in search of sweat pants; I’d been by their yesterday but they were already closed. The store, Coat Of Many Colors, turned out to be less a for-profit thrift store and more of a Salvation Army type arrangement, which was a really good thing. They were in the middle of expanding into the adjacent store space, and the place was in chaos, but the was balanced out by very nice staff who were happy to dig around looking for where particular stock was currently stashed to get it out of the way. Apparently much of what they sell is “like new” merchandise donated by Wal-mart, things that have been returned or had the packages opened or the tags ripped off. There was a huge tub, for example, of individual pairs of new underwear from opened packages. I only spent $14 but I think I did very well; I got two more pairs of socks and underwear, a quite possibly unused gym bag for $3, and most importantly very nice brand new sweatpants with that tags still on for $4. The gym bag is something I have really wanted so I’m not going into the gym with my clothes in a grocery bag: I had a bad experience years ago going to a municipal pool for a shower when the household plumbing was out; the woman at the desk reminded me that they were closing in less than an hour, and when I commented that that was fine since I was only paying to go in and take a shower, she stopped me and said I couldn’t go in at all because they didn’t allow people to pay to just use the locker room and not swim. So, I really don’t want to invite a scene like that at my gym by looking like a homeless person using the place to clean up. I haven’t been using my gym’s locker room previously; I was just going in to exercise, but fortunately I’ve been going in very regularly for the past month so me being there a lot is not going to attract negative attention. After leaving the thrift store, I spotted a laundromat that had a sign offering wifi; it was one of those nice places with an attendant, and I’m not too familiar with laundromats so it seemed like a safe place to clean my dirty laundry and the new purchases. I’m not typing this from there; after I had started my load, it turned out the wifi wasn’t working, even though I had specifically asked if it was working before starting my load. The attendant was very apologetic though, and aside from the wifi being down, it was a very nice place. I started a conversation with a woman who had gotten a Windows tablet for Christmas, and was joking that she didn’t have to do her homework on it since the wifi was down. Then she slipped into the conversation that it had been a present from her child and her wife. I was pretty impressed that she had pulled that off living in Texas, and I wish I’d thought of a polite way to congratulate her on that; as it was I kept wondering if I’d just misheard her. Anyway, I got out of the laundromat with clean folded laundry, got to the gym, packed my new gym bag, and got inside and actually had time to do about half of my usual workout and still hit the showers before they closed. After that I went looking for picnic tables. G.R.A.C.E.'s food pantry had given me two loaves of bread and big jars of PB&J, but last night I’d found trying to make a sandwich in the car was awkward and messy; the idea to eat at a picnic table had hit me this morning, and all day I’ve had my eyes open for public outdoor tables. There was a park I’d passed before not too far from the gym, so even though it was dark I went looking for it, and the sign outside said it was open until 11pm, not dark. So I drove in, found a table by a playground, and parked with my headlights pointed at it. Then I carried a bunch of my food out and got to eat like a god blessed human being sitting down at a table and everything! That was absolutely the high point of the day. I’m feeling really good, and if I can just get decent sleep tonight I think I can say I’ve stabilized things after my abrupt exodus on Tuesday. I’m at the Tom Thumb whose wifi I’ve used before right now, and I’m trying hard not to get tired and distracted like I did last night; I’m gonna make a run at the backlog of replies and thank yous I owe you wonderful people and then I need to go look for a place to go to ground. > [@Blackberry](#): > > Just call your SSI caseworker or whoever you have the contact info for and tell them you don’t know how to use your Medicaid benefits. They will definitely be able to help you with that. There will also be a way to find a list of doctors who accept it. I don’t know what that way is in your state but there will be something. > > And you don’t need an address to get food stamps! They have procedures for people without a mailing address. But there are probably also charities that will offer you a free place to pick up your mail. I know there’s one here that offers that plus laundry facilities, showers, toiletries, etc, all for free (and it’s not a shelter, it’s just for people to drop in during the day to do whatever they need to do). Luckily you have a computer and know how to use it, so you should do some research (that’s how I found those resources when I was looking to do some volunteer work…just googling). Lessee… the medicaid thing is under control now, but I will keep in mind your advice to get the doctor list. Knowing that about Food Stamps is good; I will try to look into applying for them when I can. I think setting up some way to receive mail is going to be one of the things I tackle tomorrow; I will definitely be searching for some resources along those lines. I think I’m going to put off the job search and focus on being able to take care of myself over the weekend, as I think tomorrow may be the last day to try and access a lot of things until Monday. Thank you thank you thank you for reading the writing of mine that you read and waiting the longest to get a reply from me! > [@papergirl](#): > > Make good use of your SSI caseworker. Those folks are always busy, so you will need to take the initiative–be ready with your questions and concerns when you call, and take notes on the answers so you don’t have to call back with the same questions. Otherwise, I think you have gotten some excellent advice here, and you seem willing to work to help yourself. > Take good care and keep us informed, please. I’ll be thinking of you. I was under the impression that the person at Social Security who handles my SSI is only there to administer the payments and not actually help me connect with any other aid. But you are not the first person to mention that person so I will add calling SocSec to my “things to try” list. Thank you thank you thank you for reading all of that stuff about my situation even thought it is so sad and boring! > [@Sarabellum1976](#): > > Check with the local food banks, while you look into getting food stamps. Just go over to Health and Human Resources, get in line, and tell them your situation has changed. You need Medicaid, you need SNAP, you need help finding a boarding house or some sort of low cost living arrangements. Make sure they understand you are NOT a student. > > A shopping mall might be a good spot to hang out temporarily, during the daytime. Most have free wifi and nobody’s going to look too hard at people killing time, milling around. There’s public RRs, and probably a spot to unobtrusively plug your phone in to keep the battery topped off. You could apply for work at each and every business in the place, then move along to the next shopping mall in a day or two, until you hit paydirt and score a job, or an assortment of part time jobs. > > You’ll get through this. > > Keep your chin up, make good choices. Stay safe. I’m not sure who “Health and Human Resources” is. I’ve heard terms like that before but I thought it was a description of an organization and not a name. Do you just mean whatever agency administers Food Stamps in my area? I don’t know many shopping malls in the area; this is definitely strip-mall country, but once other things are more stable I will consider that as a day place. Right now I think the library has everything else beat hands down; aside from the wifi and the safe and clean atmosphere, the study rooms let me have private telephone conversations. Thank you thank you thank you for all the reading that you have done of my writing about my doings. > [@Filbert](#): > > I don’t live in the same country, so I have no practical advice to offer, just good wishes. > > I hope you get to a better situation soon. Thank you thank you thank you for reading all these words that might not even have been in your native language! But seriously you’re probably in the commonwealth but still that just makes me think it’s cool that someone that far away is reading this and managing to care. > [@TriPolar](#): > > In some ways it sounds like you are taking more control of your life now, which would be a good thing. If that’s the case then don’t focus on the immediate results. Becoming active instead of passive may be just what you need for the long term. So hang in there, don’t brood, keep acting to improve your life. Thank you thank you thank you for reading these many written words and for replying with such nice encouraging words of your own! > [@Draelin](#): > > On the subject of where to park the car for sleeping–when I was about 21, I lived out of my car for a month or two, just seeing the country. I always felt safest parked in highway rest-stops. For every creep who might want to bother me, there were ten truckers within screaming distance who would kick his ass. Many places like that also have showers and laundry services. > > Best of luck to you, and keep us posted! This is really really good advice and reading it was actually part of what inspired me to look for picnic tables, 'cause I remember that rest stops always have them. Unfortunately the metroplex doesn’t have rest stops inside of it, so I’d have to drive quite a ways out of town in order to find one. But I will try to find out where truckers do their stopping inside the metropolitan area and look at parking there for the night. Thank you thank you thank you for reading my posts and sharing your own experience with me! > [@StGermain](#): > > There is the [Day Resource Center in Ft. Worth](http://www.fwdayresourcectr.org/what-we-do) which apparently provides internet access, mail, showers, laundry facilities, etc. for the homeless. That can help with some of your sanitary needs. > > Good luck. > > StG This looks really, really promising and I actually wanted to look into it today but just ran out of time. I am going to make it a top priority tomorrow; thank you so much for directing me to it. I really want to have a mailing address asap. Thank you thank you thank you for opening this thread and reading it and wishing me luck! > [@LouLou7](#): > > To answer a couple of your questions: > > Yes, for people who have current housing, there is a multi-year waiting list for subsidized housing. But you are now in a NEW category: Homeless. That makes you eligible for more emergency services than someone who is stable but looking to move into a _better_ situation. > > It sounds like you are lucky to have a case worker who is interested and invested in you. If you have a good caseworker, that person can help you develop a workable plan, prioritize your needs, and make calls on your behalf. > > You appear to be pretty functional at this point, and the service delivery system is designed to keep you functional. Stable housing, regular nutritious meals, taking medications as prescribed all help keep you functional at the least cost to the state. Services are available and you need to learn about them. Use your Medicaid insurance, and other state benefits. That’s why they are there for you. > > I don’t know if “Metro Social Services” and “Travelers Aid” are the actual names of the service agencies in the DFW area, but if you call information and describe your needs, they will give you the actual names and contact numbers of the agencies that provide those services. > > Oh, and some of the subsidized housing options are, like you said, not a place most people would want to live. However, I’ve been in some that are quite clean and nice, and would be a decent place to live. Your case manager can help you find a place that might be acceptable for you. > > Moving into a group home temporarily might also be an option, with the long term plan of moving out into private housing as your situation improves. One of the problems of being homeless is that you have to worry about immediate concerns (where will I sleep tonight?) and don’t look six months or a year down the road to where you want to end up. Give yourself a little time to look at long range goals, and develop a plan to get there. Thank you for writing a second reply! You are giving me a lot of information and I will go through it carefully and look into your advice. You make a good point that my housing aid option were previously limited by not being homeless; I also increasingly suspect that they were limited because I made that search in Georgia and Georgia may just be horribly dysfunctional, even in comparison to another conservative state like Texas. I am working on not dismissing things out of hand just because they didn’t pan out a long time ago. > [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > The shopping mall idea is a very good one, not only because of the possibility of scoring at least a part-time job, but also because, while you won’t be able to take a full shower, you can at least use the sinks to wash your hands and face and, well – don’t be offended! – you can take a whore’s bath too. (Wetting paper towels and using them to wipe down your stinkiest parts.) > > Also, a quick reminder: just because someone calls your phone, that doesn’t mean you have to pick up. You can even just text them back (“Hey, I got your voice mssg”) if you want to acknowledge the call without actually speaking with them. > > Oh, and if you want to be connected directly to someone’s cell phone voice mail without ever talking to the person, use [SlyDial](http://slydial.com/). In return for listening to a short advertisement, the service will connect you to voice mail without allowing the person’s phone to ever ring. > > From their website: > > I’ve used it before - it does work. > > Lastly … I’m in the Dallas area myself. I’m not in much of a position to help you directly, I don’t think, but please send me a PM if you need more local info. I’ll be checking this thread, and thinking of you. We do care, I promise. We care. As I said above, I will consider shopping malls when things are more stable; right now the library just seems unbeatable for being calm and facilitating communications. I have taken the kind of bath you speak of- actually during the also above mentioned plumbing breakdown- but I have not heard that name for it. I don’t think I shall be forgetting it. I know I don’t have to pick up the phone, but sometimes I don’t want to have to even make the decision not to do so. I have not heard of the SlyDial trick; it sounds very handy. And, uh, as of this belated reply to your reply, I’ve already replied to your very kind PM. Thank you thank you thank you for all the reading that you have done in this thread and also for all the caring! > [@swampspruce](#): > > **Strain** , it is incredibly brave of you to take the steps you have! Stay positive and follow the advice upthread! It looks to me to be incredibly useful and sage overall. I can’t really suggest much over and above what you have read already but I do know that truck stops usually have shower and laundry facilities that are relatively inexpensive if you don’t want to exercise you gym option. Also, I would recommend you find Cabala’s style outfitters and get a survival blanket (foil type)and maybe a few regular ones as well if you can; Useful for all kinds of things. Thank you for the encouragement! The gym option is working out very well at this time but I will keep in mind that I have other options. I got a blanket and towel from G.R.A.C.E.; I’m going to see how well I can do by bundling up tonight, but I don’t think I’ll be spending money on new camping equipment until I have enough of a handle on my budget to be sure I can afford it and I don’t have more cost-effective alternatives. Thank you thank you thank you for reading about where I am and what I am doing! > [@JackieLikesVariety](#): > > Strain, > > I hope to hear more from you & wishing you the best. 🙂 Thank you thank you thank you for post readings and well wishes! > [@Nava](#): > > Well, by my reckoning you’ve gone to bed at the time the wee hours were reaching kindergarten, which means you sat down to write sometime after midnight. Sleep well 🙂 I sat down closer to 10pm; I got distracted and started browsing the web. That’s why I said it got really scary for me- I was doing bad enough that I just wanted to escape into the computer and shut the world out, which is not something I can afford to do. I did go to bed very late and I paid for it very badly; I’m up quite late now, as well, but I’ve been writing steadily for two hours and getting these replies done is doing wonders for my state of mind. I can’t emphasize enough how much it means to me for there to be people who care whether I make it through the day; it gives me a reason to try much harder than I could if I was just doing it for myself. Thank you for the additional reply! > [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Hooray for good days, and for good news! And doubly-hooray for a shower! 🙂 > > Shit, that’s a triumph for almost anyone. > > Wellllllll … you don’t have to have an address to \*\*\*send \*\*\*mail, unless you’re looking to get a reply. 😉 Getting to feel clean again was a huge relief, especially since I’d been so depressed even before leaving that I’d stopped showering regularly, so I had more than just those two days grime on me. The jeans have been great; I definitely got much better treatment from G.R.A.C.E. than I went in hoping for. And yes, I could send them a thank you letter now, but I think it will mean a whole lot more when I can put a return address on the envelope, even if I’m hoping the letter won’t be returned. Thank you for the additional reply! > [@Glazer](#): > > Go back home and pick up your Meds paperwork and some clothes. To tide you over till you can get social services toset you up. Seriously, I am not going back there any time soon, and definitely not unless I can be sure certain people will not be there while I get my stuff. I wish I could convey how ugly things had gotten before I felt I had no choice but to just walk away. Thank you thank you thank you for reading my posts about my predicament! > [@Zebra](#): > > Hang in there man. Thank you thank you thank you man! > [@Maastricht](#): > > Cant you meet your Sensible Uncle in a bar somewhere and have him give you your meds and stuff? You wouldnt have to meet Crazy Aunt that way. It sounds like you really need your meds. This is not totally unreasonable, not just for the medicine that I have already gotten a hold of at this point, but for a few other important items as well. However, until I feel I can communicate with my Uncle without getting sucked back in to the family drama machine by proxy, I really do believe that non-communication is the best policy. > [@purplehorseshoe](#): > > Do you have spare $$ to get an inexpensive pre-paid phone? > > I’m glad you’re working on communicating with Medicaid and with your pharmacy. It doesn’t matter \*\*\*why \*\*\*you’re taking them – suddenly going cold turkey off SSRIs is known to cause problematic side effects like exhaustion, trouble sleeping, and other such issues that, to be perfectly honest, are probably going to be a big problem for you right now anyway. I mean, you’re sleeping in the cold in your car, so of course you might have trouble sleeping, even without Rx side effects. (Or, well, lack-of-Rx side effects.) > > All of which is to say: I’m glad you’re taking steps to get some aspects of your shit together. Keep reaching out for help – that’s exactly what it’s there for. To help. I actually stepped into a T-Mobile next door to the laundromat with the broken wifi while my clothes were drying and asked them about putting my phone back on an account in my name. What I understood to be their cheapest plan is $30/mo for unlimited talk and text. At any rate, the option is there if the phone situation becomes critical. Thank you for being so concerned about me missing my medication. I have it now and am feeling much better, whether as a result of the pills or merely because I accomplished something. Thank you for the additional additional reply! Holy crap, I went over the character limit! It won’t let me preview! Uh, I guess I’ll just snip this off here- ---
**Author:** ![Strain\_of\_Thought](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3be4f8/32.png) [@Strain\_of\_Thought](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Strain_of_Thought)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 7:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/49 "2014-01-17T07:37:22Z")
-and graft on a dreaded double post here: > [@flatlined](#): > > I’ve read everything you have written and I want to tell you that I wish you luck and that I think that you are very brave. > > I agree with everyone else, getting your meds should be your first priority. > > Sleeping in a car isn’t very comfortable and is kinda scary. Do you have blankets? Its possible that the place that gave you the clothes could give you some. That would probably help. Are you small enough to sleep curled up in the back seat? When I was living in my car, I slept better when I could lay on a flat surface instead of a reclined seat. > > If you park next to a wall that has been sun soaked all day, your car will stay warmer. Do your best to keep your car neat and clean, if you don’t look like you are living in your car, people are more willing to ignore a car parked overnight. > > Many grocery stores have marked down produce. Its bruised and/or ready to turn, but if you buy it and eat it the same day, its a way to save money. Packaged foods are all well and good, but sometimes you just gotta eat an apple. > > Best of luck to you. I’m sending a whole bunch of good wishes your way. This sounds like very good advice. I’ve definitely noticed over the past three days how rapidly living out of my car gets it dirty; I need to find one of those free auto vacuum places nearby and clean the car out very well. It’s gotten very late but I will try to make use of some of your suggestions with regards to setting myself up for sleeping instead of just crashing in the driver’s seat. And tomorrow I will definitely look at buying some produce; I’m desperately missing my orange juice in the morning and some oranges would be like ambrosia. Thank you thank you thank you bunches for reading everything and the bunch of wishes! > [@FeAudrey](#): > > You can get a free cellphone with a monthly allocation of minutes if you receive any kind of public aid, including SSI, Medicaid, and food stamps. Well, my phone works adequately. I just need a SIM card associated with an account that has minutes. But I did not realize that cellphones for those in need had become so commonplace; I will look for an opportunity to bring up issues with minutes usage next time I am talking to a caseworker. Thank you thank you thank you for the minutes you allocated to reading about my problems! YESSSSSSS I REPLIED TO THEM ALLLLLLL WOOOOOOO!!! Okay I’m beyond tired goodnight everyone thank you thank you thank you bye. ---
**Author:** ![not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/not_what_you_d_expect/32/3246_2.png) [@not\_what\_you\_d\_expect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/not_what_you_d_expect)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 1:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/50 "2014-01-17T13:19:30Z")
I wonder if a doper in your area would be willing to call your uncle on your behalf. I’m sure he’s worried about you and might be willing to meet a stranger for a transfer of some of your stuff in exchange for some information about how you’re doing? I agree that you should avoid direct contact, but this might be a good work around for you. Best of luck to you. Stay safe. ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/51 "2014-01-17T13:32:24Z")
I’m so glad you got your medication worked out and without having to ask any family members for help. I know how good it feels to be able to do something for yourself. I think you are doing great and I hope you can find an alternative to car-living eventually. Good for you for taking charge of your life! ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/52 "2014-01-17T14:25:52Z")
I read the whole thread. What an interesting journey already! It’s the little victories in life that are the most rewarding. I’m glad you were able to get your meds, that’s the Most Important Thing (after food and water, anyway). You sound perfectly capable of living on your own. It’s just a matter of learning how to navigate the social safety net and affording everything on a very minimal income–which, despite the cries of anti-welfare advocates, is not easy at all. Establishing your independence from crazy family is a really good thing, and I wish you all the best of luck. ---
**Author:** ![TokyoBayer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tokyobayer/32/13989_2.png) [@TokyoBayer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TokyoBayer)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 2:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/53 "2014-01-17T14:44:44Z")
OK, some suggestions. It’s free advice, so it’s worth exactly what you pay for. Remember, protect your sanity first and foremost. You sound really clear now. Keep it that way. You’ve got the buzz going from breaking out of a really bad situation. That’s really cool. However, the chances are that you will feel a let down, sooner or later. For me, it can be even as early as in a couple of days. You know your brand of issues, so think about them now, while you’re feeling good. What is your support network like? Obviously, your family is completely out. Is there anyone you connect with? Your highest priority is the immediate stuff. Meds. Blankets for sleeping at night. Worry about everything with your family later. Pick a date at least a week in the future and decide to worry about it then. You’ve been homeless before, so you know the routine, but it never hurts on a refresher. 1. Always stay clean. Once you’re dirty, life is a hell of a lot worse. 2. Shower and shave daily. If you have a beard, keep it really trim. 3. When living out of your car, always keep it clean and your blankets in the trunk. Put them away every morning. The police look for excuses to talk to people more, don’t provide them any. 4. Practice being friendly, but not overly friendly with EVERYONE. People at the shelters, the gym, etc. Rules can get waived and people can look the other way for friends. 5. Watch your money, but don’t be overly worried. 6. Keep a fresh set of clothes all the time. 7. Can you swap cooked meals for cleaning or some other tasks? 8. How social are you? Without regular positive human contact, most people start to go downhill. 9. Keep posting on this tread. PM people to keep a connect going, especially if you have various issues. I can keep the demons at bay a hell of lot easier when I have people to talk to. 10. Don’t worry about long term stuff right now. 11. I’ll end up where I started. Protect your sanity at all costs. Good luck. I know a lot of people who have been in much worse shape and pulled through. ---
**Author:** ![Septima](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/dc4da7/32.png) [@Septima](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Septima)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 2:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/54 "2014-01-17T14:45:31Z")
Looks like you’re getting a real handle on this homeless thing. Way to go! A thought: when you feel ready to communicate with Sensible Uncle down the line, do you have his e-mail? As someone with my own phone issues, e-mail is a lot less scary, and harder to get suckered into, especially if you make a new free e-mail account just for this. Then you can just…not check it if it goes full of drama. Just like leaving your phone off. ---
**Author:** ![Alma](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Alma](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Alma)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/55 "2014-01-17T15:21:36Z")
I just want to thank you for posting about everything you’re doing; I don’t have a lot of knowledge or experience with what you’re going through and I’m learning a lot from this thread. People are good. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 3:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/56 "2014-01-17T15:32:54Z")
{{{ **Strain of Thought** }}} In our area, Dept. of Children & Families Services is like the hub for info on kinds of help offered. Don’t know what it may be called there but if you contact United Way they can tell you. It has emergency funds for emergency situations. It’s who you go through to apply for all kinds of assistance. Ours provides a mailing address for homeless people to use. They give you a cell phone with minutes. And in the office they have flyers about potential job sources. Tell them your medical history and they may be able to offer temporary shelter somewhere (not necessarily THE shelter.) And if you keep your ears open you may hear about other resources from the other people there. Best of luck. You’re brave! You can do this, as you are proving. ---
**Author:** ![swampspruce](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/swampspruce/32/261_2.png) [@swampspruce](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/swampspruce)\ **Post date:** [January 17, 2014, 3:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/57 "2014-01-17T15:43:53Z")
You mentioned that you’re sleeping in the driver’s seat; your car has the fold down rear seat doesn’t it? You’d likely get a better night’s sleep spread out on the rear seat/trunk than semi-reclined. It sounds like you are coming to grips with everything which is outstanding! Don’t despair about the job seeking; you are certainly not alone when it comes to getting your ego bruised. There is a line in What Color Is Your Parachute ( a job seeking book) that describes exactly how the process generally goes: no, no, no, no, no, no, no, another dozen no’s, yes! Have grit, or stick toitiveness or whatever you want to call it. You have overcome a lot that most people couldn’t/wouldn’t do. The most important thing is confidence, even if you aren’t feeling it, fake it until you do. It may be worthwhile to ask at GRACE about jobs, as well. Even if they don’t have something available, someone there will likely know someone who needs help. Colin Powell started life cleaning up in a soda plant, a sticky , nasty job that nobody wanted, but because he put a solid effort in and did good work, he got promoted quickly and moved on to have a very successful life despite a lot of obstacles in his path. I’m not trying to blow sunshine up your butt, you have a hard road ahead, but you are demonstrating that you can do this. I have faith that as long as you keep doing what you’re doing, things will get better. Stay safe, and smile. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 1:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/58 "2014-01-18T01:58:53Z")
It sounds like things are looking up for you. I hope you slept better last night. Constant fatigue is so draining. I don’t have any advice, I just logged in to tell you that I was hoping that things are going well for you. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 4:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/59 "2014-01-18T04:04:39Z")
Current local temps are in the 40s, not too bad – could be waaayyyyyy worse! – and I hope you can get some warm(ish?) peaceful sleep. You seem to be taking ownership of your life; good for you. ---
**Author:** ![Duckster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/duckster/32/1244_2.png) [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)\ **Post date:** [January 18, 2014, 5:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853/60 "2014-01-18T05:07:49Z")
I’ve read this thread from the beginning and I wish all the best. May the SDMB community help you as best as we can. I do have one concern. Be careful with your car and everything in it. I would hate to have you be in the gym, a store or some other place only to return to your car and find it’s been ransacked, or worse. Be mindful that your car (and that it contains) is part of you as you are part of it. It’s your home. Be careful with it. Have you considered renting a storage garage, if you can afford it? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-i-seem-to-have-voluntarily-become-homeless/678853.md?page=4)