# So, I'm back after two years. . . ummm, what's up?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [March 12, 2008, 6:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081 "2008-03-12T06:09:51Z")
**Posts on this page:** 4
**Page:** 2
### Author:  [@Duckster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Duckster)
#### Post date: [March 12, 2008, 10:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081/21 "2008-03-12T22:00:19Z")
You haven’t been [stuck someplace](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=459521), have you?
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### Author:  [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)
#### Post date: [March 12, 2008, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081/22 "2008-03-12T22:37:36Z")
[QUOTE=Bosda Di’Chi of Tricor]
You’re not the only one who was “away” for 2 years.
> **[Woman fused to toilet seat. Not funny. Newslink](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=459524)**
>
> She sat there for 2 years!! Not dead. Alive. For 2 years!! And her boyfriend waited, before doing the 9-1-1 thing! :eek: http://hosted.ap.org/dynamic/stories/W/WOMAN\_IN\_BATHROOM?SITE=FLTAM&SECTION=US Bolding by me. WTF? 😕 😕 😕 😕 😕
So…you been “regular”, lately?
[/QUOTE]
Well, now that you mention it, I **did** just now finish that stack of Encylopedia Britannicas by the toilet.
It’s funny, I read that thread and thought to myself - she decides to stay in the bathroom **right around** the time I quit posting at the Dope. Is this one of those “a butterfly flaps its wings and a hurricane forms on the other side of the world” sort of things?
“A doper gives up posting in Oregon, and a crazy lady in Wichita begins squatting on the crapper for two years.”
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### Author:  [@Jake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jake)
#### Post date: [March 12, 2008, 11:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081/23 "2008-03-12T23:32:10Z")
[QUOTE=Crown Prince of Irony]
By the powers vested in me, as Crown Prince of Irony, I grant you the title of Lord Whoosh, Archduke of Obvious, He Whose Cat’s Breath Smelleth Like Cat Food. 😃
[/QUOTE]
Trollhaugen, Your Lord Wooshness, let me congratulate you on your new title. Especally by getting away with the use of “TROLL” in your username. THAT, I think, is most excellent! 🙂
Oh, and welcome back whatsyourname. Can I have a title too? Maybe, Sir Jake of Brake? Huh? Huh? Pretty please?
::Backs away from C.P. Irony, gesturing and bowing::
🙂
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### Author:  [@Crown\_Prince\_of\_Irony](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Crown_Prince_of_Irony)
#### Post date: [March 13, 2008, 4:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-im-back-after-two-years-ummm-whats-up/441081/24 "2008-03-13T04:03:52Z")
[QUOTE=Jake]
Trollhaugen, Your Lord Wooshness, let me congratulate you on your new title. Especally by getting away with the use of “TROLL” in your username. THAT, I think, is most excellent! 🙂
Oh, and welcome back whatsyourname. Can I have a title too? Maybe, Sir Jake of Brake? Huh? Huh? Pretty please?
::Backs away from C.P. Irony, gesturing and bowing::
🙂
[/QUOTE]
Hey, I’m not a SDMB Peerage vending machine.
This quibble notwithstanding, I shall dub you Sir **Jake** , Earl of Smithers, Duke of Grovel-on-the-beggingshire, He Who doth Not Realizeth That Crown Prince is an Entirely Self-Bestowedeth title, but by Whose Request Still Giveth said Crown Prince an Entirely Undeserved and Hollow Sense of Satisfaction. . . er, _eth_.
That’ll be $20, or some Bazooka Joe wrappers. You know, whatever you happen to have on you.
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