# So it's too hot for a July minirants thread? **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [July 3, 2019, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472 "2019-07-03T20:19:46Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2019, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/1 "2019-07-03T20:19:46Z")
Too bad, because I need a place to vent, and it’s too ridiculous for the workplace rants thread. I’ve been in need of a new work computer since November 2018. I was promised a new computer in January of this year…unfortunately, the order for my computer was added on to an existing IT ticket for another computer request, so once the first request was fulfilled the entire ticket was closed without sending my new computer. Fast forward to June, when my department manager realizes why I never received my computer. He submits a new request to IT, and assures me the computer will be in-house by July. And indeed it was! Except this wasn’t a small form factor tower like the other engineering computers; this was a tiny, underpowered box smaller than a binder. Yeah, it looks great on my desk, but it hits 100% CPU usage with four PDFs, two spreadsheets, and a handful of browser tabs (in Internet Explorer!). IT insists I have no need for an engineering computer, although the last time I checked, both my job title and my degree say **Mechanical Engineer** …go figure. I’ve had to beg to get critical order processing software installed, and they closed my request for Acrobat Pro because “it needs a license.” Well, I need to put watermarks on documents and crop pages, so fuck you. (If you’re not familiar with the steaming pile of shit that is Acrobat DC, these activities are now considered to be “editing a PDF,” which can only be performed with the Pro version.) I did manage to scavenge parts to get the old computer into working condition, but it still has issues. Until my supervisor and manager can get this shit sorted out (my supervisor told me today that it’s going to take a few weeks), I’m stuck using two craptastic computers in an attempt to do my damn job. At least I did score two new monitors. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2019, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/2 "2019-07-03T20:56:00Z")
See, **JP** , your work problem is way worse than mine, so it made a better start to the thread. Thanks! Today a lady at work brought me a fax. It was addressed to someone who used to work here and she wanted to know if I would forward it to him. I glanced at it and saw it was one of those “I am a lawyer from another country, will you partner with me to claim nine million dollars left by a dead guy who has your same last name” things. I told the lady, “No, this is a scam”, and she said, “I know, but I didn’t want to throw it away because it didn’t belong to me.” :smack: ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2019, 9:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/3 "2019-07-03T21:47:56Z")
Heh. Speaking of scams, corporate has to send out an email every few weeks to remind employees that the company president will NOT contact you from a secret meeting with an urgent request for you to immediately purchase a bunch of gift cards. This has apparently become such a problem company-wide that an email scam module was added to the mandatory safety training. ---
**Author:** ![Tatterdemalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/43a26b/32.png) [@Tatterdemalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tatterdemalion)\ **Post date:** [July 3, 2019, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/4 "2019-07-03T22:03:57Z")
> [@WolfpackJeep](#): > > I’ve been in need of a new work computer since November 2018. I was promised a new computer in January of this year… Are they trying to tell you something? A few years ago I was working for a certain company, and my work laptop died. When I asked my manager for a new one, he said that I wouldn’t be needing one, and I should just read my email on one of the lab computers for the next few weeks. So I started getting my resume up to date. Sure enough 2 weeks later the layoffs were announced. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 2:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/5 "2019-07-04T02:59:47Z")
My Beloved Butthead retired last year. He got bored very quickly and knew that I would be working for a while longer, so bought a big ass RV so he could transport rescue critters from the backwards state of TX to the enlightened states like Maine that requires pet owners to have their pet be fixed. Great! He’s got a hobby, will be active and help the cause. Of course, having the thing retro-fitted for animal transport instead of humans took some time. He got it back today, and its wonderful! Just what we wanted. So, all he had to do was put the license plates on it and load up. This was the first time we had looked at the totally not custom plates that were delivered with the RV which was bought to be driven by some old bald guy across state lines while carrying puppies and kittens. Wanna know what they say? No eating or drinking while scrolling! 123 FAP Yeah, we will be dealing with that on Friday. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/6 "2019-07-04T05:27:16Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > …123 FAP Oh, sorry. I read that as a countdown, like 123 GO! And I assumed everyone would be doing a Synchronized Fapping routine. But it was just me. In a classy French restaurant. Zut alors! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 5:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/7 "2019-07-04T05:57:18Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > My Beloved Butthead retired last year. He got bored very quickly and knew that I would be working for a while longer, so bought a big ass RV so he could transport rescue critters from the backwards state of TX to the enlightened states like Maine that requires pet owners to have their pet be fixed. > > Great! He’s got a hobby, will be active and help the cause. Of course, having the thing retro-fitted for animal transport instead of humans took some time. He got it back today, and its wonderful! Just what we wanted. So, all he had to do was put the license plates on it and load up. > > This was the first time we had looked at the totally not custom plates that were delivered with the RV which was bought to be driven by some old bald guy across state lines while carrying puppies and kittens. Wanna know what they say? > > No eating or drinking while scrolling! > > 123 FAP > > Yeah, we will be dealing with that on Friday. So are you going to open a thread in IMHO or MPSIMS soliciting suggestions for personalized plates for the Rescue-Mobile (personalized plates DOES strike me as the most straightforward solution to this problem)? On another note, WELCOME BACK! 🙂 While acknowledging that it’s fundamentally a sentiment based in selfishness, I’m confident that I speak for more than just myself when I say you’ve been missed. ---
**Author:** ![purplehorseshoe](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/purplehorseshoe/32/2996_2.png) [@purplehorseshoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/purplehorseshoe)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 6:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/8 "2019-07-04T06:33:38Z")
Well, shit, flatlined. Where you been? And why in hell did it take 3 1/2 days to start this month’s mini rant thread? I would’ve, but, for once, didn’t have anything to bitch about. Finally, I would totally keep that plate. That’s fucking awesome. If Beloved B. won’t drive something with that plate, I’d auction it off to support the critter rescues. Get some college frat boys to bid on it - you’ll make a mint. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 7:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/9 "2019-07-04T07:50:02Z")
Hi, **flatlined**! How’s the new house coming along? Would it look bad if I went to do my shopping? We’ve got a mountain of work THIS BIG, but alas, we don’t have permission to do any of it. I think we should be able to call it a WFH day and make it a WFTheBeach instead. ---
**Author:** ![WolfpackJeep](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wolfpackjeep/32/2921_2.png) [@WolfpackJeep](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WolfpackJeep)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 9:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/10 "2019-07-04T09:33:23Z")
> [@Tatterdemalion](#): > > Are they trying to tell you something? I’m sure they are, but dang if I can figure out what it is. Even with the computer difficulties from corporate, the division I work for has sunk a significant amount of money into refreshing the entire building – painting all of the walls (with actual colors – no beiges or off whites); replacing all the cabinets, tables, and appliances in both break rooms; custom signs for both the driveway and the lobby (interestingly, the big sign that used to grace the tallest part of the building was removed); a touchscreen-equipped coffee/cocoa dispenser; new furniture for the front lobby, the main conference room, and the little sitting area outside the general manager’s office; massive flat screens for both break rooms; a completely upgraded WiFi network (for guests only – no employee usage allowed!). We rent the building, if that makes any difference. My company’s function is critical to most of our customers – there might be one or two other companies in the country who are in our line of work, but they lack the appropriate contracts to immediately pick up the slack if my company were to cease operations. I could see corporate thinking it would be a good idea to consolidate our operations into one of their other, larger locations though. > [@flatlined](#): > > 123 FAP > > Yeah, we will be dealing with that on Friday. 😃 North Carolina’s standard vehicle plates consist of three letters and four numbers. Many years ago, a local teacher went screaming to the largest news channel in the area after her students explained why everyone was laughing at the “WTF-###” plates on her new car. The DMV promised to discontinue use of the combination, even to the extent of supposedly recalling all of the offensive plates, but I still see somewhat newish ones occasionally. ---
**Author:** ![Nava](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/da6949/32.png) [@Nava](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nava)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 12:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/11 "2019-07-04T12:19:26Z")
A person in a WhatsApp group, claiming that “since in Spain discrimination against LGBTI+ people doesn’t happen, there’s no reason for this Pride thing”. There’s no robberies in Egypt either, asshole. I was more polite than that in the group because otherwise I am the one being shrill, but Jesus, people like that make my hands itch. ---
**Author:** ![Kelevra](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/97f17d/32.png) [@Kelevra](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kelevra)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/12 "2019-07-04T12:22:12Z")
Ahh, a nice peaceful morning on the front porch with a cup of tea. The boy and wife are asleep. The dog has been fed. Feel the stress float away. Hmmm what time is it? 7:59 Tick Tick Tick 8:00! Cue the lawnmowers! Fire up the two cycle line trimmers and leaf blowers! It’s the suburbs, we’ve got to have our lawns just right! Sigh Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 2:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/13 "2019-07-04T14:39:36Z")
**flatlined** , it is so good to hear from you again! I started reading your post and thought “Beloved Butthead? Wait… there’s only one of those…” and indeed, 'twas you! Frankly, I was relieved to hear that BB is still doing well… retired, and RV’ing critters! Good for him. I do hope you’ll get to post more often. We miss you, and any little stories you or your Beloved have got. ---
**Author:** ![BobLibDem](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/boblibdem/32/3149_2.png) [@BobLibDem](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BobLibDem)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/14 "2019-07-04T15:07:52Z")
> [@Kelevra](#): > > Ahh, a nice peaceful morning on the front porch with a cup of tea. The boy and wife are asleep. The dog has been fed. Feel the stress float away. > > Hmmm what time is it? > 7:59 > Tick > Tick > Tick > 8:00! Cue the lawnmowers! Fire up the two cycle line trimmers and leaf blowers! It’s the suburbs, we’ve got to have our lawns just right! > Sigh > Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk There are times when I mow early just because it’s going to be too hot later on. If that’s the case, I don’t mind so much. But if you’re mowing early on a cool day, you’re a jerk. So it’s July 4th and my Facebook feed is full of troop-sucking glurge. Enough! I know you fucking just fucking love our infallible lovable god-like warriors of democracy! We’ve got Armed Forces Day, Flag Day, Memorial Day, Independence Day, and Veteran’s Day. Five fucking days each year turned into Suck The Military’s Dick Day. Fuck. ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 3:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/15 "2019-07-04T15:11:04Z")
@ **flatlined** : Told ya. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![The\_Vorlon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/d07c76/32.png) [@The\_Vorlon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Vorlon)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/16 "2019-07-04T17:42:24Z")
So now it looks like ICloud took the 4th off. Sucks to be Apple support today! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/17 "2019-07-04T20:21:08Z")
> [@The\_Vorlon](#): > > So now it looks like ICloud took the 4th off. Sucks to be Apple support today! As a cloudless luddite, I feel like I dodged a bullet here. My first reaction was, “Yikes! But I’m in the middle of a bunch of Mac and Photoshop work!”… Then I remembered I’m running CS6 at home, so don’t have to connect to either the Adobe or Apple motherships. Also helps that my photos backup to my laptop, not any cloud. (Yeah, I should take the holiday off, but it’s for my kid’s wedding invitation, which has to get printed pronto.) ---
**Author:** ![Projammer](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/projammer/32/559_2.png) [@Projammer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Projammer)\ **Post date:** [July 4, 2019, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/18 "2019-07-04T22:40:08Z")
> [@WolfpackJeep](#): > > Heh. Speaking of scams, corporate has to send out an email every few weeks to remind employees that the company president will NOT contact you from a secret meeting with an urgent request for you to immediately purchase a bunch of gift cards. This has apparently become such a problem company-wide that an email scam module was added to the mandatory safety training. One of the PMs on my current contract related a story to me where someone attempted the same scam on her a few months ago. She immediately recognized it for what it was so nothing came of it. But it still leads to one of my favorite soapbox topics. [firstname.lastname@company.com](mailto:firstname.lastname@company.com) as an email format is just begging for these kinds of spearphishing attacks. Get a person’s name and employer from FB or LinkedIn and have a blast. firstname.lastname.\*\*\*@company.com will at least make a scammer do some work. Where \*\*\* is three random alphanumeric characters. ---
**Author:** ![flatlined](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/eb9ed0/32.png) [@flatlined](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flatlined)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2019, 12:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/19 "2019-07-05T00:00:45Z")
Thanks for the warm welcome back 🙂 Thanks also for the suggestion to auction the plate to a frat boy, more rescue money is always an awesome thing. My BB loves his plates and says that he’s going to grow enough fringe hair to get a pony tail extension attached and is going to start chewing a stodgy. I think that he is NOT going to do anything like that and the plates will be replaced post haste. We are both laughing too much to have a good enough argument for make up sex, so we will just have to deal with having anniversary sex instead. No pony tails involved. In sad news, Steve died of kidney failure last year. He was a very good cat who came to us damaged but did the best he could once he had his slaves properly trained. Steve’s Kitten was with him when the vet came for the final visit and tried to hiss the vet away, so we had to put her in another room. She hid for about a week, then went to the rescue room and picked out a puppy to have for her own. We didn’t want another dog and we certainly didn’t want a puppy. Even if we did want a puppy, we would not have picked a puppy that looks to grow up and be a moose. A very hairy moose with monster feets. Puppy is now 6 months old, towers over the greyhounds and refuses to pee/poop outside. That’s what litter boxes are for. ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 5, 2019, 12:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472/20 "2019-07-05T00:33:34Z")
> [@flatlined](#): > > We didn’t want another dog and we certainly didn’t want a puppy. Even if we did want a puppy, we would not have picked a puppy that looks to grow up and be a moose. A very hairy moose with monster feets. Puppy is now 6 months old, towers over the greyhounds and refuses to pee/poop outside. That’s what litter boxes are for. A puppy? Oh, good, you haven’t gotten older and wiser since we last schmoozed with you. Oh, tell BB we want a pic of him with a fake ponytail, a fake stogie and a fake “I’m rescuing pets, not your sorry ass” tattoo. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-its-too-hot-for-a-july-minirants-thread/836472.md?page=2)