# So, what are your flaws? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [March 14, 2003, 10:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295 "2003-03-14T10:29:51Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 10\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2003, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/41 "2003-03-14T23:04:13Z")
Poor social skills. I think many strangers think I’m rude or something, instead of just shy. ☹ Being perceived as rude, harsh, snappy when it is not my intention. ☹ ☹ ☹ This is a family trait, though. I just appear harsher than what I meant, sometimes I think I’m being courteous with a stranger (or even a friend), but they perceive it as a rude act or comment. I try to avoid it when I’m self-conscious about it, but if it’s just something spontaneous then I can’t help it much, except apologize (if it’s a friend) a lot afterwards. ☹ ---
**Author:** ![Bishamon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/3e96dc/32.png) [@Bishamon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bishamon)\ **Post date:** [March 14, 2003, 11:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/42 "2003-03-14T23:27:10Z")
Yet another no social skills reject here. Isn’t funny how many of us have no social skills here though? Are all of us that stunted? I really don’t think so. Look how many of us all just jumped in here to start talking to essentially a group of strangers, and did so honestly. Perhaps we aren’t so bad after all. Perhaps I’m not the reject I thought I was. I’m actually feeling better now. Thanks!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Audrey\_Levins](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/73ab20/32.png) [@Audrey\_Levins](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Audrey_Levins)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/43 "2003-03-15T01:33:50Z")
I’ll go the extra mile for everyone but myself; if you ask me to do something for someone else, I’ll do it in a heartbeat, but if I myself should do something similar, it’ll back-burner for months. I disappoint myself on an almost daily basis. Procrastinator Extraordinaire. I hate day-to-day cleaning. If it isn’t a huge project, or won’t make a vast difference in the way things look or run, I’m not interested. Dusting is anathema to me. I’m extremely sarcastic, and quick to get angry; I have been told I get very snide when I’m pissed off. (It’s impossible for me to _stay_ angry, but the lightning flash can be ugly.) I’ve got a quick mind and an even quicker tongue, so the “can’t-resist-saying-it” one-liners most people think of the next day, I just say. Right then. I often regret this. (I’m also quick to apologize, however, if I felt I went into bitch mode. This doesn’t make it right, but it does make me feel better.) I am one of the few people, apparently, who’s good at smalltalk. I think the thing people don’t realize about smalltalk and chitchat is that it has to be cultivated, just like any other skill. I bartend for a living, so I have to be good at the extended bullshit. After awhile it’s like a second skin; I just effortlessly fall into this amusing pitter-patter of conversation. No one ever suspects that I’m not really enjoying it; people will come in months later and expect to pick up our “wonderful conversation” right where we left it…not realizing that I do it every day, all day long, and that they weren’t nearly as memorable as I made them feel. 😃 But I used to be very shy and reserved, just like a lot of the people on this thread; you’d never know it now, so I think the trick is to do it a lot. (And I had to throw that in there, just b/c a lot of people seem to feel like being bad at smalltalk is some kind of flaw, or inherent failure, and it isn’t. It’s just a trick, like anything else, that has to be practiced. Why do you think so many male bartenders pick up so many women? ;)) Oh, and if I don’t solve a problem immediately, I’ll let it go forever. If I don’t paint my apartment the moment I move in, I never will. If I don’t quit a job the moment I think I should, I’ll stay there forever. If I don’t put up the bookshelves I bought the day I bought them, it’ll take months, and a visit from my mother, for me to get off my ass and do it. I don’t know what that’s called, but I’m so familiar with it that I compensate for it constantly. “Do it NOW or you NEVER WILL!” Maybe this is a time management problem. Or maybe it’s just laziness. ---
**Author:** ![Lissla\_Lissar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/8491ac/32.png) [@Lissla\_Lissar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lissla_Lissar)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 1:51am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/44 "2003-03-15T01:51:01Z")
My husband says I’m messy. I can cook dinner for fourteen out of nothing but leftovers, but it’ll look like a bomb exploded in the kitchen. I’m very shy, and not assertive enough about my opinions, even if I know I’m factually correct. I also think I have most of the seven deadly sins covered, especially pride and despair. I’m working on them. Lots of others, but they’d take too long to write out. ---
**Author:** ![Forbin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/5e9695/32.png) [@Forbin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Forbin)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 3:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/45 "2003-03-15T03:07:39Z")
I procrastinate. Damn! ☹ ---
**Author:** ![drm](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a88e57/32.png) [@drm](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/drm)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/46 "2003-03-15T04:28:04Z")
The list is long I’m afraid, but I’ll throw out a few though. I have a terrible memory - unless I want to remember something really upsetting, I seem to have no trouble with that. I worry about pretty much everything. I spend too much money. I have no idea how to talk to people (especially those of the fairer sex). ---
**Author:** ![Scotticher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9c0ed/32.png) [@Scotticher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scotticher)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 4:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/47 "2003-03-15T04:54:02Z")
If I were to actually list them, I’d break the server. So you are now able to enjoy the “Guess Scotti’s Foibles” game…now, isn’t that a “GOOD THING”? Hee…or [hidesunderabarrel] ---
**Author:** ![Lovey](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ebca7d/32.png) [@Lovey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lovey)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 8:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/48 "2003-03-15T08:19:24Z")
Humiliy is not one of my flaws ; but If I had one that would be it . ---
**Author:** ![Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecd19e/32.png) [@Aslan\_of\_Narnia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Aslan_of_Narnia)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 8:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/49 "2003-03-15T08:25:30Z")
It bothers me when I thought _I_ was good at something, or knowledgable about something and then someone comes along and does/says it better than me. I wish there was something that I could boast about being really good at compared to everybody else because in a lot of things I am not very good, such as sports or math. ---
**Author:** ![ProjectOmega](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b487fb/32.png) [@ProjectOmega](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ProjectOmega)\ **Post date:** [March 15, 2003, 8:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295/50 "2003-03-15T08:46:49Z")
Why am I not surprised at the number of “poor social skills” and “overweight” posts? 😃 But since I took the liberty of getting a cheap shot in, I’ll go ahead and list mine too. -I’m waaaay too concerned with my appearance. It’s not that I spend hours and hours grooming myself, either. I’m actually as close to zero management as you get. Shower, shave, brush the teeth and I’m out the door. I even shaved my head to be done with my hair (which is/was naturally wavy and unruly). I just happen to hate the way I look. I get told that I’m a good-looking guy every once in awhile (sometimes I even get told I’m “hot”, although that’s extremely rare, and the people from which that issues are usually less than stellar in their mental stability :p), but I can’t help but try to not look myself in the mirror. This is probably more serious than I give it credit for, come to think of it, but I’m not the therapy type. -Arrogant. I’m sure this is a problem most people here have (being the intellectual individuals you are), but I don’t consider myself to be extrordinarily intelligence. I can just be very “Am I the only one that can do anything right?” arrogant sometimes. I also think I have some leftover I’m-a-teenager-and-thus-know-everything" syndrome in my blood. -Sarcastic. I think my sense of humour is largely made up of sarcasm, but I’ve been told on several occasions I can get downright hurtful with it. I’m watching what I say more and more, though. -I can be harsh on people with personal problems. I’m very much an “Advice Guy”, the one person everyone comes to with their problems for a talk/shoulder to cry on/etc. (which is, coincidentally, the one thing that both drives and hinders my success with the ladies). However, I take it upon myself to tell my guy-friends to suck it up. Something in me doesn’t believe a Real Man ™ shouldn’t be able to cope with absolutely everything that’s thrown at him. The females are ok, and my empathy and sensitivity with them can get downright girlfriendly with them, but for guys, I rarely have mercy. In fact, that “suck it up” face-to-face strategy was implemented on one of my best friends all throughout high school. He was later diagnosed with chronic depression. Oops. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-what-are-your-flaws/161295.md?page=2)