Hello all. I saw this in Reader’s Digest a few years ago. Thought it might be relevant here.
I Believe You, Mr. President
By: Michael Kelly
I believe the President. I have always believed him. I believed him when he said he had never been drafted in the Vietnam War, and I believed him when he said he had forgotten to mention that he had been drafted in the Vietnam War. I believed him when he said he hadn’t had sex with Gennifer Flowers, and I believe him when he reportedly says he did.
I believe the President did not rent out the Lincoln Bedroom and did not sell access to himself to hundreds of well-heeled special pleaders. I believe he did not supervise the largest, most systematic money-laundering operation in campaign-finance history, collecting more than $3 million in questionable and improper donations.
I believe in the Clinton standard of adherence to U.S. campaign-finance and bribery laws, enunciated by the President on March 7, 1997: “I don’t believe you can find any evidence of the fact that I had changed government policy solely because of a contribution.” I note with approval the use of the word “evidence” and also the use of the word “solely”. I believe that it is proper to change government policy to address the concerns of people who have given the President money, as long as nobody can find evidence of this being the sole reason.
I believe the President has lived up to his promise to preside over the most ethical Administration in American history. I believe that indicted former Agriculture Secretary Mike Espy did not accept $35,000 in illegal favors from Tyson Foods, and other regulated businesses. I believe that indicted former Housing Secretary Henry Cisneros did not lie to the FBI and tell others to cover up payments to his former mistress. I believe that convicted former Associated Attorney General Webster Hubbell was not involved in the obstructions of justice when the Presidents minions arranged for Hubbell to receive $400,000 in sweetheart consulting deals at a time when he refused to cooperate with Special Prosecutor Kenneth Starr’s Whitewater investigation.
I believe Paula Jones was asking for it. I believe Kathleen Willey was asking for it. I believe that Gennifer Flowers was asking for it. I believe Monica Lewinsky was asking for it.
I also believe Lewinsky was fantasizing in the 20 hours of taped conversation in which she reportedly detailed her sexual relationship with the President and begged Linda Tripp to join her in concealing the relationship. I believe that any gifts, correspondence, telephone calls and the many post-employment White House visits that may have passed between Lewinsky and the President are evidence only of a platonic relationship. Such innocent intimate friendships are quite common between middle-aged married men and young single women, and also between Presidents of the United States and White House interns.
I see nothing suspicious in the report that the President’s intimate, Vernon Jordan, arranged a $40,000-per-year job for Lewinsky shortly after she signed, but before she filed, an affidavit saying she had not had sex with the President. Nor do I read anything into the fact that the ambassador to the United Nations, Bill Richardson, offered Lewinsky a job.
Finally, I believe that the Washington Post, the Los Angeles Times, the New York Times, Newsweek, Time, U.S. News & World Report, ABC, CBS, NBC, CNN, PBS, and National Public Radio are all part of a vast right-wing conspiracy.