# So What's the Worst Crush You Ever Had? **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 17, 2009, 11:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255 "2009-02-17T11:32:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![zamboniracer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/z/e9a140/32.png) [@zamboniracer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/zamboniracer)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 10:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/41 "2009-02-18T22:03:38Z")
Her name was Martha, she lived in my dorm sophomore year and that’s all I’m going to say about it. Restraining orders, you know. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![lobotomyboy63](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/lobotomyboy63/32/2900_2.png) [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 10:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/42 "2009-02-18T22:07:46Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > She was so damn beautiful and sang so wonderfully that she took my breath away; she was the only celebrity that was ever the subject of any of my fantasies. I used to have this poster on my wall: [http://cgi.ebay.com/Linda-Ronstadt-1977-Poster-Rare\_W0QQitemZ110351197683QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH\_DefaultDomain\_0?hash=item110351197683&\_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&\_trkparms=72%3A1205|66%3A2|65%3A12|39%3A1|240%3A1318|301%3A1|293%3A1|294%3A50](http://cgi.ebay.com/Linda-Ronstadt-1977-Poster-Rare_W0QQitemZ110351197683QQcmdZViewItemQQptZLH_DefaultDomain_0?hash=item110351197683&_trksid=p3286.c0.m14&_trkparms=72%3A1205%7C66%3A2%7C65%3A12%7C39%3A1%7C240%3A1318%7C301%3A1%7C293%3A1%7C294%3A50) IMO her babe-itude caused people not to take her as seriously musically. But dayum, she could belt it out…or sing it sweetly as you please. Here she is, singing “Long, Long Time” on the Midnight Special: ![](https://img.youtube.com/vi/gG4lsjSY_vk/maxresdefault.jpg)https://www.youtube.com/embed/gG4lsjSY_vk?feature=oembed&wmode=opaque ---
**Author:** ![Garula](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/ea666f/32.png) [@Garula](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Garula)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 10:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/43 "2009-02-18T22:15:03Z")
> [@suranyi](#): > > But here’s the really strange thing about that period in my life, as I look back on it (it’s now thirty years gone by). At the same time that I must have been totally obvious in my feelings for this girl, I was constantly being picked on and teased by many of the boys for being “gay”. It didn’t occur to me at the time, but now, looking back, didn’t they see I couldn’t have been gay since I was constantly mooning about this girl? This reminds me of one of my favorite Simpsons quotes: Jimbo to Nelson after walking in on his date with Lisa: “You kissed a girl? That is SO gay!” None of mine are particularly interesting. I remember back in middle school I had a crush on a girl in one of my classes. Not particularly sure why, since she isn’t really my type, but it may well have had to do with the rather sexy dress she would sometimes wear. Since she would usually sit in the same area, I would try to arrive at the classroom early and grab a seat there. Sometimes it worked, but sometimes she would ask me to move so she could sit next to one of her friends. That was a bit of a blow. Never did make make any advance, but I left that school pretty soon after so I got over it, though along the commute to the next school there was a business prominently displaying her last name on the sign. Kinda weird for me in the morning, since I never did see her again. In high school one summer I was taking classes at a college and staying in the dorms. There was a girl in my social circle who had a crush on me. In retrospect, it was blindingly obvious. I mean, how often does a girl stare longingly at you while you’re just sitting around in your room playing video games? However, I am perhaps the most oblivious person in the world to these things so I never caught on. A couple years later, she told me about it and something did come of it, but no relationship. In college I started crushing on a girl pretty hard. Very pretty, in a particularly cute way. Similar interests to mine (girls who like action and zombie movies are depressingly rare). She was in the same major as me, so our paths crossed a fair amount early on, including a study abroad. We were definitely friends, but never really close friends. I always kinda got the impression that she more tolerated me than actually enjoyed my company. I definitely went to the coffee shop a lot more than I would have otherwise, hoping to run into her. But, the coffee and hot chocolate were very good there, so I could justify it to myself. Later on I saw her less and less, but about once a term I would have a good conversation with her and would feel giddy for the rest of the day. Never did get up the courage to ask her out. I’m mostly over that one, but now I live in the same city as her and we’re both single, so I cannot say it has been completely extinguished. There was also a girl crushing on me, apparently. We lived in the same house so we certainly saw a lot of each other. I never really picked up on anything until very close to my graduation (she is a couple years younger than me) when one night she turned the flirting on very hard, before explicitly telling me her feelings. Not wanting to start something just before leaving the area, I turned her down. Later, a mutual friend told me she took it a lot harder than I had realized. We’re good friends these days, though, so it could definitely have been worse. Sigh, now I need a drink. ---
**Author:** ![Proudest\_Monkey](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/proudest_monkey/32/13257_2.png) [@Proudest\_Monkey](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Proudest_Monkey)\ **Post date:** [February 18, 2009, 11:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/44 "2009-02-18T23:47:02Z")
My best/worst crush was on **Ed** in high school. He was a year ahead of me, ran with the same crowd, and was the most perfect specimen of 17-year old manhood ever envisioned by 16-year old girls. We hung out a lot together in my boyfriend’s basement, smoking reefer, drinking beer when we could get it, listening to Neil Young and Cat Stevens and Todd Rundgren. (Yes, I do identify with “That 70s Show”-- it was my fucking LIFE). Anyway, after the boyfriend and I broke up, **Ed** and I had a couple of hot make-out sessions and I totally stalked him. Went to the HS guidance office and snatched his schedule so I could plan on “running into him by chance” in the halls, drove with my friends past his hang-out spots, wrote dreadful poetry and song lyrics in my journal to declare my undying obsessions with lovely, so-pretty-he-ought-to-be-gay **Ed**. Flash forward a couple hundred years. My life is (almost) everything I ever wanted it to be including a loving husband, rewarding career, perfect daughter and son-in-law who I love like my own, nice house, fabulous friends, good health and challenging hobbies. But one day I Googled **Ed**. Just to see, yanno? Because he was the Kelso of our group. Always stoned, not particularly smart, but devastatingly good-looking. He’s a lawyer! A prominent, well-respected attorney with one of the premier firms in the state! I mean, he is BIG TIME now! (And, if the newspaper photos are any indication, he has NOT lost his looks.) I think he’s gay. ---
**Author:** ![Moccioso](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ecb155/32.png) [@Moccioso](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Moccioso)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/45 "2009-02-19T00:31:46Z")
Mine was in college, a very smart and good looking redhead. She had that look, when I said the right thing, of the sideways smirk which melted me. We were friends with the unfortunate timing that one of us was always in a relationship whenever the other was not. We made out a few times (shallow cheating, whatever) but she never let it get beyond kissing. I let her know that I thought we should go out, but alas, the timing was always wrong. My senior year she was fairly distant while I was dating the girl who ended up becoming my wife. Didn’t really understand why. Flash to a few months ago. We reconnected via facebook and the talk has flowed very well. In discussing those college days I come to find that she had a huge crush on me. The reason she was distant was that she couldn’t stand to see me, it was that bad for her. I wish she’d’ve said something then, I had no idea. So it turns out that our unrequited loves were… each other. Talk about miscommunication. We’re getting to be friends again, but I’m starting to feel the creepings of the crush resurface. Which. Just. Sucks. ---
**Author:** ![MikeG](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mikeg/32/4329_2.png) [@MikeG](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MikeG)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 12:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/46 "2009-02-19T00:50:16Z")
Ahh, Darla. She was a customer of mine and I fell hard. We had a lot of interests in common and she was absolutely my personal ideal of beauty. She made it clear that she was only interested in being friends and I thought I could deal with that. Long story short, I couldn’t, I told her how I felt in an email and have spoken to her only once in the last two years:) ---
**Author:** ![CairoCarol](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cairocarol/32/3825_2.png) [@CairoCarol](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CairoCarol)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 2:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/47 "2009-02-19T02:13:14Z")
> [@](#): > > originally posted by **xanthous** : > I can’t believe I didn’t think immediately of this crush: My english professor in art school. He wore courderoy jackets with suede elbow patches and Harry Potter-style glasses. He was gorgeous with salt/pepper hair and a nutty-yet-totally-able-to-get-passionately-serious personality. He made me fall in love with writing. I took every class with him that I could. He gave me a book by my favorite author my junior year, which I still have. The night before my final project was due, I found out my boyfriend was cheating on me. I didn’t finish the project and begged tearfully in his office the next day not to fail me. He gave me a B-. The next summer after I graduated, I became friends with the dean’s wife at some kind of opening, and admitted my crush over cocktails. She arranged for us both to attend a get-together at their house. I remember speaking to him there, but I was so scared to death that I hardly remember any of it. Somehow he got my number and called, and we went on 3 dates. Casual dates to a movie, a museum, and dinner, I think. I was so scared that I hardly remember any of it. On the third date we went up to my apartment and started making out. He got one of my socks off. I was so scared that I pushed him off of me and ended the evening, and thusly ended the romance. I still have the postcard from him that said, “It wasn’t you, it was me.” I was just way too young (and too petrified) to get involved in such a mature relationship like that. > > But hot damn, what an awesome dream come true to date my college professor crush. > > Forward a few months later to me sitting in the laundry room of my apartment building flipping through a random fashion magazine left on a table there, and whose name do I see as the author of an article about his inability to really be in a long-term relationship? His. Whoa. I still have that magazine, too. That made me remember a somewhat similar story. It was a young poli-sci professor, and when I graduated from college and stayed in the area, I did the math, concluded we were not too far apart in age to date, screwed up my courage, and asked him out. I was thrilled to pieces when he said yes! We had a few dates, but things got weird very fast as soon as we got to the point where custom dictated a greater level of physical intimacy. A little light petting clearly freaked him out, and our relationship quickly petered out. (Pun intended, if you want it to be.) A few years later I got together with some college seniors from my alma mater, and they regaled me with stories of his reputation of being a jerk toward women. ---
**Author:** ![Uncommon\_Sense](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/u/f9ae1b/32.png) [@Uncommon\_Sense](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Uncommon_Sense)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 3:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/48 "2009-02-19T15:09:45Z")
> [@LouisB](#): > > She was so damn beautiful and sang so wonderfully that she took my breath away; she was the only celebrity that was ever the subject of any of my fantasies. Man, she had the greatest _lips_ ever. I think I may have made out with her record album cover a time or two. 🆒 ---
**Author:** ![xanthous](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/53a042/32.png) [@xanthous](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xanthous)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/49 "2009-02-19T17:38:09Z")
> [@CairoCarol](#): > > That made me remember a somewhat similar story. It was a young poli-sci professor, and when I graduated from college and stayed in the area, I did the math, concluded we were not too far apart in age to date, screwed up my courage, and asked him out. > > I was thrilled to pieces when he said yes! We had a few dates, but things got weird very fast as soon as we got to the point where custom dictated a greater level of physical intimacy. A little light petting clearly freaked him out, and our relationship quickly petered out. (Pun intended, if you want it to be.) > > A few years later I got together with some college seniors from my alma mater, and they regaled me with stories of his reputation of being a jerk toward women. Yeah, it was pretty apparent that the 3 dates were customary “pre-sex etiquette” for him. It just seemed too expected, this third-date-clothes-off scenario. And plus, I think I could have been any pretty girl and this same thing would be playing out. I couldn’t handle it. (If he would have been any kind of bad boy, I likely would have let the evening play out 🆒 , but there was something about the respectability of this guy as a professor and the esteem in which I held him that made it all wrong) Too bad. I would’ve liked to see him nekkid. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Count\_Blucher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@Count\_Blucher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Count_Blucher)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/50 "2009-02-19T18:31:06Z")
Having a crush always sucked for me. They made me way too available in that persons eyes, which lowered my value in their estimation in a ‘well, if that one is so easy, I must be able to do better w/o even trying’ kind of way. I regret every crush I’ve ever admitted to, as they always went badly for me. If some drug company came out with a flu shot to prevent me from ever having crushes going forward, I’d sign up in a heartbeat and I’d be back annually for booster shots. ---
**Author:** ![CallMeKate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/3d9bf3/32.png) [@CallMeKate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CallMeKate)\ **Post date:** [February 19, 2009, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/51 "2009-02-19T20:39:15Z")
I developed a crush on someone I didn’t think I would ever have a chance with. He was a friend of a friend, and he had a girlfriend. Well, we started talking, and it became more and more regular (try to keep in mind, I did not know he had a girlfriend until a month or so of talking?) and I began to look forward to talking to him a lot. He was funny, and intelligent, and we had things in common. Well, I went home with the mutual friend over thanksgiving break, and the crush was around a lot, I spent a lot of time talking to him in person and texting him, and then I realized how I kind of liked him. He just seemed like so much fun, and so handsome! I couldn’t help but think of how awesome he was, and it would be really cool to just be able to kiss him and act on whatever other impulse I had. OH BOY! Well after we got back from vacation, a few days later he and his girlfriend broke up, this was in November… We had been talking since mid-october. Mind you, we talked EVERY day, literally every day, and pretty much all day… We hung out a lot and spent just as much time talking, and in the middle of December before we got out for christmas break we were “seeing eachother”… He actually came to watch me get my first tattoo, and met my sister. It all seemed very surreal. Well, after christmas break, when we got back to college, we spent every night together. We started dating a little while ago, and it has been really great. Lucky me! ---
**Author:** ![Jolly\_Roger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Jolly\_Roger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jolly_Roger)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/52 "2009-02-20T00:25:08Z")
Well, there was a thread a few months ago about unrequited affection where I spoke of a girl that I was crushing on for years. Here’s the short version of the story: > [@](#): > > Yeah, unrequited love or at least the thought you’re in love but infatuated can really hurt. Its a lot worse when you’re younger, I think. In High School I had a girl I was infatuated with named Karen. At least she let me down gently, but it crushed me for a long time. I was only 16, but it felt like I’d feel crushed forever back then. Then later it was Maria. but she started dating a guy named Joey. This guy had me outclassed by so much even my best friend at the time told me to just give it up. He was better looking, had more money, a better car and they were both latino. I tried though. I’d bring her flowers, etc. It was when I saw them both on TV on a local teen dance show winning some kind of best dancing couple prize that I threw in the towel. My friend, though he tried to be supportive couldn’t stop laughing at me. > > Then there was Petra. Since junior year in High School I wore my heart on my sleeve for her. Even when she dated other guys I kept thinking “One day she’ll see how much I care about her and we’ll get together.” Right. > > Freshman year in college (we went to different colleges, me out of state, but only an hour or so away) I asked her to be my date to a big ball my school threw every year. She said yes, and I was over the moon. I got a new freakin’ suit to wear. but when I came to pick her up she told me that she knew I was in love with her, but she just plain didn’t feel that way about me and she just wanted to be friends. To that end she didn’t think she should go to the ball with me since it would only hurt me further. I was devastated. I think only the girl that in the future cheated on me hurt me worse. It felt like my insides were just ripped out. I left her dorm, and spent hours walking around drinking Mad Dog 20/20. Then I thought, maybe I need to just proclaim my sincere true love to her to make her change her mind. Yeah, I realize now how dumb that was. At the time though I was drunk, young and totally in love with this girl. So I drunkenly went back to the dorm knocked on her door and as soon as she opened it I barged in and loudly said “I’ve loved you since 10th grade! I can’t live without you, Petra, PLEASE can’t you see how much I love you???”, only to look around and see her parents and brother were visiting and looking at me like a crazy man. I ran out of the room and went to a nearby park where I sat all night swiggin’ liquor and crying…rather loudly, too. I ain’t makin’ this up, either, though it sounds like a teen movie from the 80s. > > The bittersweet part is that as the sun rose I saw her coming towards me on my bench. She told me that after her parents left she’d been looking for me all night. (she called my house I found, and asked my grandmother where I was…my grandma didn’t know who she was and told her “He’s at the ball with some girl he went to school with”.) She at least held me a little while and apologized for hurting me so badly and told me she loved me like a friend since I was really a nice guy. So I felt a little better, but for years I thought I’d never ever be in love with anyone again. Man, I’ll never forget how bad that felt. ---
**Author:** ![sjc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e5b9ba/32.png) [@sjc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sjc)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 3:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/53 "2009-02-20T03:44:03Z")
> [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](#): > > From _The Onion_: [Totally Hot Chick Also Way Psycho](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29357) > > Also in the same vein: [Romantic-Comedy Behavior Gets Real-Life Man Arrested](http://www.theonion.com/content/node/29546) > > Stranger Underneath the articles in the “recent news” section was this article [http://www.theonion.com/content/news/girl\_would\_be\_terrified\_if\_she](http://www.theonion.com/content/news/girl_would_be_terrified_if_she) Sort of related to the OP **and** kind of creepy. ---
**Author:** ![Cyberhwk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/7993a0/32.png) [@Cyberhwk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cyberhwk)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 10:46am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/54 "2009-02-20T10:46:59Z")
> [@Cisco](#): > > I wasted 10th grade crushing extremely hard on a girl whom I didn’t have the balls to tell. I was so infatuated that I would literally feel pain and get nauseous when I looked at her. When South Park came out a couple years later I could totally relate to Stan puking every time he saw Wendy. By the time I got around to making it obvious I was way too deep into friend territory. This, except in college. She was so much different (and better) than anything I was used to, I was so worried I’d screw stuff up I didn’t make a move. She thought I wasn’t interested and moved on. She found another BF, and I went off the deep end. Pretty embarassing thinking about how I acted at the time. Worst part was I know the EXACT fucking moment I could have sealed the deal. We were over drinking and having fun, she sits on the couch next me…leans over…I put my arm around her and give her a hug. :smack: > [@](#): > > Farthest I ever got was spooning with her one night at her house and feeling a boob under the pretense of “feeling her heartbeat” :rolleyes:⭕p. LOL ---
**Author:** ![Jolly\_Roger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/91b2a8/32.png) [@Jolly\_Roger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jolly_Roger)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/55 "2009-02-20T17:08:31Z")
I had a mini-crush during my after college/before the army days on a girl I went to High School with named Katrina. We ran into each other after I had the most painful, heart rending breakup with she-who-will-remain-nameless-but-is-an-evil-(word for female canine). Katrina and I found we had a lot in common, and while I was feeling the crush for her I figured we’d only always be just friends. I know she didn’t feel any more than friendship for me, even though I thought she was hot and a terrific person. We hung out, went to eat together, went to museums, etc together. Great girl. One saturday night we got together at my house. I was living in my mom’s old house. Everyone in my immediate family (stepdad, mom, grandmother, sister) had passed away practically in one year from different causes. So my mindset at the time was that I was kinda alone in the world and yeah, I felt pretty desolate and lonely a lot. Anyway, I had the fireplace going, we were in the den wathching movies and drinking wine and she starts telling me about a guy she was dating that treated her badly and they broke up. She was upset about it and started crying, we were on the couch and holding her while she let it out. We started the old tentative kissy kisses where you peck at each other seeing who is going to make the first move, and just as I was going for the grab the boobs/undo the bra manuever a little angel whispered in my ear _“She’s relying on you as a friend. She’s vulnerable right now, and you know you’d be taking advantage of her if you do what the little head is telling you to do.”_ Of course, anyone who has seen animal house knows what the little devil on my shoulder was saying. I stopped myself and decided my role was merely to comfort her. _sigh_. Nice guys finish last, but I think I did the right thing. I still wonder how she is and hope she’s happy wherever she is now. (lost touch with her after I left town in the military.) ---
**Author:** ![Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/13edae/32.png) [@Stranger\_On\_A\_Train](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Stranger_On_A_Train)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2009, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255/56 "2009-02-20T17:55:14Z")
> [@Jolly\_Roger](#): > > Anyway, I had the fireplace going, we were in the den wathching movies and drinking wine and she starts telling me about a guy she was dating that treated her badly and they broke up. She was upset about it and started crying, we were on the couch and holding her while she let it out. We started the old tentative kissy kisses where you peck at each other seeing who is going to make the first move, and just as I was going for the grab the boobs/undo the bra manuever a little angel whispered in my ear _“She’s relying on you as a friend. She’s vulnerable right now, and you know you’d be taking advantage of her if you do what the little head is telling you to do.”_ > Of course, anyone who has seen animal house knows what the little devil on my shoulder was saying. I stopped myself and decided my role was merely to comfort her. _sigh_. “It was the first time I felt it, how pitying someone and wanting to fuck them can get all tangled up in your head. Overwhelming sadness while having a rodney. Is that sick? Yeah, I think that’s sick…” – Harry Lockhart, _[Kiss Kiss Bang Bang](http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0373469/)_ Stranger [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-whats-the-worst-crush-you-ever-had/486255.md?page=2)