# So which "down there" procedure hurts more?
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109
**Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share
**Created:** [May 8, 2004, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109 "2004-05-08T00:16:48Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@dotchan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dotchan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/1 "2004-05-08T00:16:48Z")
I’m mostly referring to the examinations, but feel free to throw in other things (like waxing or Nair).
I don’t think there’s the male equivalent of a Pap Smear, but my guy friends swear up and down that there’s plenty of things worse than “turn your head and cough”. Having been through a Pap Smear myself (and icked enough by them to be tempted to disavow them forever), I’m hard pressed to believe it, but maybe the Teeming Millions can set me straight.
So, share your horror stories! You don’t have to use euphemisms, but you definitely get bonus creativity points for clever ones.
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### Author:  [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/2 "2004-05-08T00:19:40Z")
vasectomy
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### Author:  [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/3 "2004-05-08T00:25:19Z")
Childbirth was no picnic.
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### Author:  [@Cisco](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cisco)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/4 "2004-05-08T00:29:31Z")
> **[YEEEEEOOOWWW! Nair on my balls!](https://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=255116)**
>
> :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: Oh lord, forgive me for my sins! How could I have been so stupid?!? I told my girlfriend time and time again not to leave me alone; I get bored and do stupid shit! I’ve been like this all my life. I...
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### Author:  [@angelicate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/angelicate)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/5 "2004-05-08T00:37:14Z")
I was going to ask if childbirth counted.
I really don’t think that many “down there” procedures could hurt worse than that.
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### Author:  [@caymus28](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/caymus28)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/6 "2004-05-08T00:37:45Z")
I second the vasectomy. I had mine done last year under a local anesthetic. Although I thought I was numb, the electrical devise used to cauterize blood vessels and what not hit a nerve…down there…yep. I’m talking broken bone pain[sup]10[/sup]. I’m squirming thinking about it now, as are you, I’m sure.
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### Author:  [@dotchan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dotchan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/7 "2004-05-08T00:38:40Z")
> [@Cisco](#):
>
> [http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=255116](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=255116)
That was the thread that inspired my OP. (And also the earlier one about, um, waxing. :eek: You people are insane.)
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### Author:  [@dotchan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dotchan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/8 "2004-05-08T00:40:49Z")
> [@angelicate](#):
>
> I was going to ask if childbirth counted.
> I really don’t think that many “down there” procedures could hurt worse than that.
I actually forgot about that one. :smack:
I guess it counts, although the activity that lead up to the childbirth sort of balances it out, right? 😃
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### Author:  [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 12:52am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/9 "2004-05-08T00:52:41Z")
Not necessarily…a bruised cervix is not the most comfortable experience
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### Author:  [@irishgirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/irishgirl)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/10 "2004-05-08T01:01:16Z")
My mother had an endometrial biopsy done, they didn’t check her records properly, so they thought she’d had 4 kids naturally (nope, all c-sections) and didn’t use any anaesthesia when they dilated her cervix.
She passed out from the pain.
This is a woman who has root canals without lidocaine, because she doesn’t like having a numb mouth afterwards.
Ouch.
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### Author:  [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/11 "2004-05-08T01:10:49Z")
Yeah, I had an endometrial biopsy done for infertilty. Hint, when someone wants to insert something into your uterus, the correct answer is “where’s the Vicodin?”
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### Author:  [@Kansas\_Beekeeper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kansas_Beekeeper)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 1:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/12 "2004-05-08T01:11:56Z")
> [@caymus28](#):
>
> I second the vasectomy. I had mine done last year under a local anesthetic. Although I thought I was numb . . .
Me too. Unbelievably painful. The local simply didn’t work on one side.
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/13 "2004-05-08T01:44:37Z")
> [@Dangerosa](#):
>
> Yeah, I had an endometrial biopsy done for infertilty. Hint, when someone wants to insert something into your uterus, the correct answer is “where’s the Vicodin?”
Not to laugh at your suffering, but _damn_ that’s funny. Somewhere around here there’s a thread where a Doper describes in graphic detail his vasectomy gone wrong. Really, though, I’d imagine that female circumcision is probably the most painful “procedure” one could have inflicted upon their genitalia.
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### Author:  [@Dangerosa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dangerosa)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 2:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/14 "2004-05-08T02:03:01Z")
Many among life’s most painful moments are really very funny…there was my first marriage, for example.
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### Author:  [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/15 "2004-05-08T02:26:16Z")
I went to a urologist as part of the steps to find out why I was having so many UTI/kidney infections. The first one I went to, wasn’t entirely competent. Apparently his staff was well aware of this too. I sat there, whimpering/retching on the table and nearly passing out as he put the instrument in to look at my bladder walls. He used some kind of pain killing gel right before he went in to look. (The same kind the dentist uses before numbing the area with a shot) The nurse actually sat there holding my hand, with a pitying expression on her face! The second urologist I went to said I shouldn’t have felt any pain at all, and proved this. I did indeed, feel no pain. The second guy used the gel too, but he waited a while before going in to look. This made all the difference. Childbirth was no picnic either.
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### Author:  [@aruvqan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/aruvqan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/16 "2004-05-08T03:05:43Z")
There are these \ tools that one inserts into … places … _Some_ people use them for sex play…\
NOT WORK SAFE - unless your job is _very_ strange
[http://www.bdgsales.com/sounds.html](http://www.bdgsales.com/sounds.html)
i do NOT want these coming near any of my tender bits thankyouverymuch!!!
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### Author:  [@Tuckerfan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tuckerfan)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/17 "2004-05-08T03:18:31Z")
> [@aruvqan](#):
>
> There are these \ tools that one inserts into … places … _Some_ people use them for sex play…\
> NOT WORK SAFE - unless your job is _very_ strange
>
> [Loading...](http://www.bdgsales.com/sounds.html)
>
> i do NOT want these coming near any of my tender bits thankyouverymuch!!!
Great googly moogly! That’s disturbing!
> [@](#):
>
> Urethral Play Video
>
> Want to learn how to use catheters and sounds? This video is for the top who wants to do it right. Covers the tools, the techniques, proper cleaning, and shows what can be done in real play scenes. 60 Minutes, VHS USA / NTSC format only.
And for those of you who are unsure if you should click the link, there’s a very **clinical** looking photo on the site of it being done. (shudder)
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### Author:  [@Zabali\_Clawbane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Zabali_Clawbane)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 3:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/18 "2004-05-08T03:56:25Z")
_Shudder_ That’s the procedure that was done on me, except instead of a catheter, it was a tool for looking at my bladder walls. It HURT a lot. I’m female, so at least I didn’t have the longer length of urethra. It honestly felt like razor blades scraping down the entire way, in and out. I can’t imagine wanting ot have that procedure done without enough local anesthetic applied to numb you!_Shudder_ :eek:
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### Author:  [@Chanteuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chanteuse)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/19 "2004-05-08T04:09:30Z")
Having a pelvic done when you have an (unbeknownst to you at the time) ectopic pregnancy is _agonizing_. At least it was for me. I thought I was having a miscarriage and went to the ER. The doc was not very gentle, and my cervix was already so tender that even coughing was painful. Let’s just say that I never
cried (OK, I **did** beg for an epidural that first time, but I never cried!) during _hard_ labor in subsequent years, but that exam left me in tears.
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### Author:  [@wolf\_meister](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wolf_meister)
#### Post date: [May 8, 2004, 4:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/so-which-down-there-procedure-hurts-more/244109/20 "2004-05-08T04:31:05Z")
I’m a guy and I had a test for gonorrhea. (negative - by the way).
Anyway, the nurse held a probe (something about as wide as a Q-Tip™) and she inserted it about a half inch _into_ a _very_ tender spot!!! Luckily, she was quick about the whole thing and this probably took less than a second. Still it was a somewhat painful and also very weird feeling. Had she pushed that in deeper or left it in longer than a second, I would have given her the secret formula to Coca-Cola !!!
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