# Socks - I have rules about them **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [December 13, 2014, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138 "2014-12-13T17:06:13Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![TriPolar](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tripolar/32/3008_2.png) [@TriPolar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TriPolar)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/41 "2014-12-14T01:41:11Z")
My rule is always wear two socks. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/42 "2014-12-14T01:47:48Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > I do one thing with, or for, my socks that most people don’t these days. I darn them. I only do that with the ones that I really don’t like. “Darn you, sub-par sock!!” You know, like that. ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/43 "2014-12-14T01:59:59Z")
I once asked my mother to tell me which sock was the right sock, and which was the left sock, but she wouldn’t answer me. I keep insisting, and finally she yelled, “It doesn’t matter!” “Exactly!” I said. “That’s why I want to switch them! So. . . please tell me: Which is which?” ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 2:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/44 "2014-12-14T02:24:01Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > I wear socks to bed as well, almost all year. The only time I don’t is the hottest part of summer. > > I do one thing with, or for, my socks that most people don’t these days. I darn them. When I get the first hole I actually sew it up!:eek: When the next hole appears in the same sock I throw them in the rag bag. I use a device that came from my grandmother. As a kid I called it “the wooden drumstick”, because it looks like a chicken leg. You stick the blunt end into the sock and it neatly spreads the fabric so you can see just where to ply your needle. Anyone else ever used one? I’ve heard of a darning egg. Wonder why it’s all chicken related? ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 2:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/45 "2014-12-14T02:27:34Z")
I’ve been buying the same basic socks (about half the pairs white, the other half gray) since college so that when one sock wears out I can save it as a spare and so that matching them after laundry is a total no-brainer. ---
**Author:** ![turner](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/22d042/32.png) [@turner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/turner)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 2:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/46 "2014-12-14T02:32:20Z")
When I was in officer training school in the 80s, for inspection, socks had to “smile”. When you roll socks and then flip one of the openings around the rest of the sock so it won’t unroll, the bottom of the sock makes a curved “bellybutton-like” slit. You had to have the socks positioned to the curve was up forming a smile vs down and forming a frown. My wife used to get a kick out that when I did my laundry after I was commissioned. ---
**Author:** ![Broomstick](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/broomstick/32/246_2.png) [@Broomstick](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Broomstick)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/47 "2014-12-14T02:56:03Z")
> [@Baker](#): > > I wear socks to bed as well, almost all year. The only time I don’t is the hottest part of summer. > > I do one thing with, or for, my socks that most people don’t these days. I darn them. When I get the first hole I actually sew it up!:eek: When the next hole appears in the same sock I throw them in the rag bag. I use a device that came from my grandmother. As a kid I called it “the wooden drumstick”, because it looks like a chicken leg. You stick the blunt end into the sock and it neatly spreads the fabric so you can see just where to ply your needle. Anyone else ever used one? It’s called a “darning egg” and yes. I’ve considered making them, what with sock making becoming somewhat trendy these days. They’re hard to find. ---
**Author:** ![Pai325](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/c68b51/32.png) [@Pai325](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pai325)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 3:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/48 "2014-12-14T03:05:28Z")
> [@Broomstick](#): > > - I can wear a pair all day, but if for some reason I take them off I can not put them back on before laundering. Only clean and pristine socks go on the feet. Once they are on my feet, they are dirty. If I take them off after five minutes, they go in the laundry. ---
**Author:** ![Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slow_moving_vehicle/32/291_2.png) [@Slow\_Moving\_Vehicle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slow_Moving_Vehicle)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 3:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/49 "2014-12-14T03:13:05Z")
> [@RID905](#): > > This is my first post, so please be gentle and supportive. > > 🙂 LOL. > Yes, I have several rules about socks. > > A few of them are as follows: > > - If I take off my socks ( either white sport socks, or black dress socks) for whatever reason, and then decide to put them back on, each MUST go back on the same foot from which it came. I will hold them up, and try to determine where the big toe stretch area is, and if one sock doesn’t show it, I will hold up the other sock to figure it out. Putting socks back on the wrong foot is just not acceptable. > > - If I have been walking around in socked feet, and go to put on a pair of shoes, then I will scruff each foot up against the opposite pant leg to clear anything stuck on the bottom of my sock before putting it in my shoe. Putting socks with unknown items stuck on the bottom back into a shoe, so that I end up walking around on that dirt, is just not acceptable. > > - When taking a nap, socks must be removed before going to bed. I have found that socks will twist and rotate while sleeping so that the sole is on top. Getting out of bed with socks twisted 180 degrees sideways is just not acceptable. > > Thanks for allowing me to share my important sock rules. > > 😛 Glad to see you, **RID905**. We welcome all posters regardless of their soxuality, even deviant twisted freaks like yourself. Socks come out of the dryer _en masse_, and are dumped into the drawer. Sometimes they don’t even make out of the laundry basket. When dressing, any two socks of similar color - hunter and kelly green, for example - constitute a match. Any further concern given to soxual organization is the mark of a mind that will one day occupy the time of the FBI’s Serial Crime Unit. But welcome! ---
**Author:** ![sparky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@sparky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sparky_1)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/50 "2014-12-14T03:20:31Z")
I find it repulsive to put shoes on if I’ve been walking around in socks. I have to put fresh socks on first. ---
**Author:** ![justmeetee](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@justmeetee](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/justmeetee)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/51 "2014-12-14T03:25:28Z")
Been buying Hanes white crew socks for years. No folding, rolling, stuffing or any other form of matching. Just all laid out with toes to the left side of the drawer open end to the right and soul to front. First laundry day of each month turn the pile over so toe to right open to left and soul to back so they get rotated. ---
**Author:** ![sparky\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/77aa72/32.png) [@sparky\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/sparky_1)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/52 "2014-12-14T03:25:32Z")
Oh, I only wear SmartWool socks. If they ever go under, then I swear I will go barefoot. ---
**Author:** ![BrassyPhrase](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ea666f/32.png) [@BrassyPhrase](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrassyPhrase)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/53 "2014-12-14T04:44:54Z")
This thread made me have to go put on socks! I _try_ to buy the same socks each time, but it never works out and ever so often we have an ‘empty the sock drawer on the couch and sort while we watch tv’ evening. It’s a Party Zone around this house! ---
**Author:** ![Don\_t\_Panic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/don_t_panic/32/398_2.png) [@Don\_t\_Panic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_t_Panic)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 5:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/54 "2014-12-14T05:20:01Z")
> [@justmeetee](#): > > First laundry day of each month turn the pile over so toe to right open to left and soul to back so they get rotated. As I mentioned earlier, I have only one brand and color of sock. But I’ve actually gone even further down the road to Sock Zen: I don’t even bother rotating my socks, I just chuck them right on top of the pile again from the laundry. I realized that rotating is pointless. The overall lifetime of a pile of socks is the same whether I wear them all out evenly, or wear out the pile from front to back, in sequence. As long as there are still socks in the pile, I’m good. I do tend to throw newly purchased socks to the back of the heap, or at least towards the general direction of the back, but there’s really no reason to even do that. As long as I acquire new socks when the total amount shrinks to a given minimum, it’s all the same. Sure, there may be some socks all the way at the back that aren’t worn for 40 years, while the front lines get a massive amount of turnover, but, well, who cares? The average amount of sock wear is equal either way. Basically, I think of my socks more as a uniform liquid, rather than as a collection of discrete objects. Folding, rolling or arranging them in the drawer in any particular direction is of course completely out of the question. Yes, I have put a lot of thought into finding the laziest possible solutions for these things. That’s how I roll in life. ---
**Author:** ![notfrommensa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/f14d63/32.png) [@notfrommensa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/notfrommensa)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 5:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/55 "2014-12-14T05:35:46Z")
My one and only rule:I insist that all my socks have at least one hole in them. If I buy socks and they don’t have at least one hole in them, I take them back. So far so good. All my socks have had at least one in them. ---
**Author:** ![kayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayaker/32/441_2.png) [@kayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayaker)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/56 "2014-12-14T13:08:00Z")
> [@TriPolar](#): > > My rule is always wear two socks. Ahh, just above the mean. ---
**Author:** ![Siam\_Sam](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/d78d45/32.png) [@Siam\_Sam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Siam_Sam)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 1:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/57 "2014-12-14T13:37:16Z")
I have the openings to a bunch of sock puns, but the dryer ate all the punch lines. ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 5:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/58 "2014-12-14T17:09:42Z")
> [@Siam\_Sam](#): > > I have the openings to a bunch of sock puns, but the dryer ate all the punch lines. I was going to go the “sox = sex” route but around here people may actually HAVE violent socks. Ya just never know with a group this diverse. ---
**Author:** ![RID905](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ecccb3/32.png) [@RID905](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RID905)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 7:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/59 "2014-12-14T19:11:16Z")
Today was laundry day. And I thought of this thread while sorting sox. And realized there is one more rule worth posting: If a sock gets a hole in it, ( usually from going through the washer and dryer ) then it becomes a no-holes-barred extravaganza to try and make the hole bigger while I’m wearing it on the next round. I’ll drag my foot, scuff it around, and do anything to try and make the hole more disastrous. Then, I’ll keep checking the hole status ( if just wearing sox ) or wait until the end of the day and take my shoes off, to look at the bottom and see what happened during the day. If it’s bad enough, they get ceremoniously tossed in the garbage. Yes, I too live at Party Central. :smack: ---
**Author:** ![CheshireKat](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cheshirekat/32/1207_2.png) [@CheshireKat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CheshireKat)\ **Post date:** [December 14, 2014, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138/60 "2014-12-14T19:40:51Z")
> [@RID905](#): > > snip/ Then, I’ll keep checking the hole status ( if just wearing sox ) or wait until the end of the day and take my shoes off, to look at the bottom and see what happened during the day. \ Do you alert the media? 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/socks-i-have-rules-about-them/707138.md?page=4)