# Soft or hard? How do you like yours? **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [July 24, 2003, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609 "2003-07-24T13:06:29Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![brainfizz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/da6949/32.png) [@brainfizz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/brainfizz)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/1 "2003-07-24T13:06:29Z")
I’ve been given many a massage in my time, and I like it hard. Not painful, but enough that you can feel it. I tend to give quite forceful massages too. I’ve had some people come back to me and say that I give the best massages ever and offer to pay me for more, and the occasional one or two that say I’m too hard. So… dear dopers, do you prefer it hard or soft? ---
**Author:** ![Isabelle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/b5a626/32.png) [@Isabelle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Isabelle)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 1:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/2 "2003-07-24T13:09:16Z")
I prefer the Swedish massage which is hard on the muscles. I too like to feel the resistence of my muscles. I feel like I have a better massage that way. I used to suffer from migranes and the Sports massage was gentle but rough enough for me to enjoy and it took away my headaches without having to take drugs. ---
**Author:** ![fotosbyfrank](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/54ee81/32.png) [@fotosbyfrank](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/fotosbyfrank)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 2:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/3 "2003-07-24T14:21:31Z")
I thought this was a thread about pretzels ---
**Author:** ![Greenback](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/2bfe46/32.png) [@Greenback](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greenback)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 2:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/4 "2003-07-24T14:52:19Z")
IMO, deep tissue massages are the best. There are times that you’ll have the sensation to move away from the person’s hands, but it feels so good that you stay. I used to get those all the time playing hockey competitively. It was grand. If I got one now, I’d probably just cry like a little girl. I really need to get back into shape. ---
**Author:** ![dwc1970](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a183cd/32.png) [@dwc1970](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dwc1970)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 3:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/5 "2003-07-24T15:47:31Z")
QUOTE]\*Originally posted by fotosbyfrank \* \*\*I thought this was a thread about pretzels \*\* [/QUOTE] And I thought it was going to be a thread about eating eggs. That said, I like mine hard. Never gotten a professional massage, but if I were to get one I think I would prefer a soft one. ---
**Author:** ![BurnMeUp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@BurnMeUp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BurnMeUp)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/6 "2003-07-24T16:09:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by fotosbyfrank \* > \*\*I thought this was a thread about pretzels \*\* I was thinking Tacos. I have honestly never had a massage. Anyone wanna contribute? ---
**Author:** ![Hello\_Again](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/85e7bf/32.png) [@Hello\_Again](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hello_Again)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/7 "2003-07-24T16:30:01Z")
I can’t take any degree of pain during a massage. It cause me to completely tense up (and that sort of goes against the point as far as I’m concerned.) For all intents and purposes, this means I prefer it rather soft. However with trained professionals, my tolerance is higher, because they are less likely to just wail on my back indescriminately. I thought this was going be about mattresses. To which I say: hard as a rock, please. ---
**Author:** ![Eva\_Luna](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/e495f1/32.png) [@Eva\_Luna](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eva_Luna)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 5:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/8 "2003-07-24T17:32:31Z")
Depends on what levels of “hard” and “soft” we’re talking about, as well as whether the massage is for a particularly tense or painful area. If my neck is in pain, then please don’t whack the hell out of it until it’s been loosened up gently first. But as in other endeavors, too soft, and you’re not going to accomplish anything. Use common sense to gauge the recipient’s reactions. In general, though what **Zenster** said. ---
**Author:** ![Mr.Moto](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/9de0a6/32.png) [@Mr.Moto](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mr.Moto)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 5:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/9 "2003-07-24T17:38:13Z")
I thought ice cream. I like hard ice cream and hard massages. ---
**Author:** ![DeadlyAccurate](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ac91a4/32.png) [@DeadlyAccurate](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DeadlyAccurate)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 5:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/10 "2003-07-24T17:55:25Z")
I thought it’d be about cheese. I like hard massages. Too soft just feels like someone is rubbing my back/neck/shoulders. That just annoys me. ---
**Author:** ![Ms.Fisk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/46a35a/32.png) [@Ms.Fisk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ms.Fisk)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 6:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/11 "2003-07-24T18:02:37Z")
I like it hard, too. If I need something soft, why pay a professional? I’ve been told that smaller people\* need deeper massages, partly because more compact people are tougher, and partly because everyone thinks small people need a light touch when they need a hard one. \*I’m talking about petite people, here, not people with dwarfism. ---
**Author:** ![TeaElle](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8491ac/32.png) [@TeaElle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaElle)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 6:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/12 "2003-07-24T18:47:17Z")
I thought it was going to be about rock music. In both rock and massage, my preference is for something medium, not too soft, but not too hard, either. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/13 "2003-07-24T19:01:15Z")
Why are you all afraid to admit you’re initial thought was really about pillow firmness? There’s no shame in it. ---
**Author:** ![Sunshine](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Sunshine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sunshine)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/14 "2003-07-24T19:17:27Z")
Personally, I was thinking eggs. If it’s eggs, then hard. Pretzles? Also hard. Tacos? Both. Mattress? Hard but with a pillow top. Ice Cream? Soft. Cheese? Both. Rock music? Variety. Pillow? Firm but with a mattress top. And massages…well, while it’s happening I enjoy the softer massage better, but after the fact I’ve always felt more benefits from the hard massage. But, oh how painful the hard massage is! Totally not enjoyable while in progress. I recently had some neck pain and was sent to physical therapy for it. They determined it was by upper back causing the trouble. So part of the time I spend doing exercise to strengthen the upper back and the rest of the time (usually about 40 min) I had “soft tissue work” which basically was a massage given by a sadistic dominatrix. She was impressed with my high level of pain tolerance, though. And also, something I learned from this experience: if you are feeling slightly under the weather, as if you might possibly have a cold coming on, don’t get a massage! I was feeling a bit sniffly the day of my first appointment and the next day had a raging flu/cold that made me miserable for over a week. The therapist told me that if you’re sick, massage can actually make the illness sort of “erupt” sooner or worse. Interesting. ---
**Author:** ![Blackeyes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/f6c823/32.png) [@Blackeyes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blackeyes)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/15 "2003-07-24T19:18:42Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by fotosbyfrank \* > \*\*I thought this was a thread about pretzels \*\* I like mine big and soft. ---
**Author:** ![TeaRoses](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/c37758/32.png) [@TeaRoses](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TeaRoses)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 8:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/16 "2003-07-24T20:34:48Z")
Well the few times I’ve had a professional massage it wasn’t hard enough to be painful. But they kept asking “is this too hard” and I kept saying “no…” Hard pretty much goes for the rest of the questions too, though I can’t stand eggs under any circumstances. ---
**Author:** ![Marley23](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/45deac/32.png) [@Marley23](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Marley23)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 8:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/17 "2003-07-24T20:57:14Z")
My impulse was “hard water.” Anyway, I definitely prefer a softer massage. Although having a petite girl walk across your back feels better than it has any right to. ---
**Author:** ![jellen92](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/6bbea6/32.png) [@jellen92](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jellen92)\ **Post date:** [July 24, 2003, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/18 "2003-07-24T20:58:59Z")
I thought it was a topic about eggs for some reason… Oh - and I love swedish massages, I had one where they used aromatherapy oils and did deep-tissue massage. It was sheer heaven… ---
**Author:** ![available\_light](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9fc29f/32.png) [@available\_light](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/available_light)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 12:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/19 "2003-07-25T00:28:07Z")
I prefer soft (though I would use the term “gentle”) massages. I bruise incredibly easily and it’s just no fun when you can practically feel the black & blue spots popping up all over. I’ve only ever had two professional massages–one was a Swedish massage that was like a torture session. The other was incredible–I don’t know what it is called, but it takes place in a largish bath-tub like thing that has jacuzzi jets. You float in the water with the jets going and the masseuse just gently massages and manipulates your limbs. It feels wonderful. Just curious, **DeadlyAccurate** , why does it annoy you to have someone rubbing your back or shoulders? To me that feels wonderful, especially if it’s someone you care about. ---
**Author:** ![Peg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/b38774/32.png) [@Peg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peg)\ **Post date:** [July 25, 2003, 12:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609/20 "2003-07-25T00:39:31Z")
Cheese. I thought this was about cheese. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/soft-or-hard-how-do-you-like-yours/190609.md?page=2)