# Solitary and Mutual Wanking **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [March 25, 2004, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365 "2004-03-25T16:21:11Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![WernhamHogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a587f6/32.png) [@WernhamHogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WernhamHogg)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/61 "2004-03-26T02:08:39Z")
> [@Finagle](#): > > Sadly, there’s a difference between an “in-joke” and an obscure or even witty reference that goes right over your head. This was neither, then. It was not an “in” joke, merely a stupid one, and certainly not a “witty one.” And a littany of quasi celebrities who belong to the Church of Elron are better over my head than in it. ---
**Author:** ![don\_t\_ask](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e68b1a/32.png) [@don\_t\_ask](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/don_t_ask)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/62 "2004-03-26T02:23:11Z")
> [@Left Hand of Dorkness](#): > > If a thread is being really badly hijacked, then you can try to steer it back on course, using the “more flies with honey than vinegar” principle. Are you certain about this principle? From my observation cow turds work better than honey. ---
**Author:** ![AncientHumanoid](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ancienthumanoid/32/278_2.png) [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/63 "2004-03-26T03:15:04Z")
Don’t blame me. _She’s_ the one who brought up the odd potato chips in the first place! ---
**Author:** ![MoodIndigo1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/e8c25b/32.png) [@MoodIndigo1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MoodIndigo1)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/64 "2004-03-26T03:24:22Z")
Cites, people?! ---
**Author:** ![pencilpusher](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/d6d6ee/32.png) [@pencilpusher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pencilpusher)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:25am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/65 "2004-03-26T03:25:36Z")
My cat just coughed up a hairball. ☹ HI OPAL!! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/66 "2004-03-26T03:30:00Z")
Remember the magical properties of Phi. Especially Pumpkin Phi. Small unexplained anomalies!! ---
**Author:** ![cheddarsnax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a587f6/32.png) [@cheddarsnax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cheddarsnax)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 3:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/67 "2004-03-26T03:54:20Z")
> [@Max Carnage](#): > > ItShut up! That’s not funny. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/68 "2004-03-26T04:01:40Z")
Perhaps this would be a good time to request that someone PLEASE direct me to or just explain the origin of the 1920s Style Death Ray thing? Thank you. ---
**Author:** ![WernhamHogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a587f6/32.png) [@WernhamHogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WernhamHogg)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/69 "2004-03-26T05:08:24Z")
[It’s really not that funny.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=202225) ---
**Author:** ![CrazyCatLady](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dfb087/32.png) [@CrazyCatLady](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CrazyCatLady)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/70 "2004-03-26T05:39:45Z")
> [@pencilpusher](#): > > My cat just coughed up a hairball. ☹ > > HI OPAL!! 😃 Does that mean his breath smells like puke now, instead of cat food? ---
**Author:** ![askeptic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/eb9ed0/32.png) [@askeptic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/askeptic)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/71 "2004-03-26T05:47:42Z")
I would think, if anything, it would now smell like hair. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![kambuckta](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/53a042/32.png) [@kambuckta](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kambuckta)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/72 "2004-03-26T05:56:59Z")
> [@CrazyCatLady](#): > > Does that mean his breath smells like puke now, instead of cat food? I would have thought it smelled like Opal. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 5:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/73 "2004-03-26T05:58:36Z")
> [@skutir](#): > > [It’s really not that funny.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=202225) Thanks for the link. With all due respect, dude, I think you need to grow a sense of humor. 1920s Style Death Rays. Heh. ---
**Author:** ![Dijon\_Warlock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a9a28c/32.png) [@Dijon\_Warlock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dijon_Warlock)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 7:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/74 "2004-03-26T07:06:17Z")
> [@don't mind me](#): > > Yeahyeahyeah. All’s I know is, I wanna go to the Secret Wanker’s Ball. I’ve got a pair of 'em… …On second thought, maybe that’s not what you meant… _Paging Emily Letilla, paging Emily Letilla!!_ ---
**Author:** ![WernhamHogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a587f6/32.png) [@WernhamHogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WernhamHogg)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 12:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/75 "2004-03-26T12:50:09Z")
> [@Green Bean](#): > > With all due respect, dude, I think you need to grow a sense of humor. But I’m cultivating a humorless persona. Everyone here has a sense of humor. I’ll be the humorless guy. ---
**Author:** ![GrizzRich](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/7ba0ec/32.png) [@GrizzRich](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GrizzRich)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/76 "2004-03-26T13:44:47Z")
Wow… This thread’s gotten to two pages and no one’s once mentioned “twin body-powered prostheses with matching Dorrance #5X stainless-steel hooks”. Whodathunkit? ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/77 "2004-03-26T16:28:29Z")
> [@skutir](#): > > But I’m cultivating a humorless persona. Everyone here has a sense of humor. I’ll be the humorless guy. Well, then, where’s your “Ask the Humorless Guy” thread? Huh? > [@](#): > > This thread’s gotten to two pages and no one’s once mentioned “twin body-powered prostheses with matching Dorrance #5X stainless-steel hooks”. Nobody’s mentioned the Tug-Ahoy[sup]TM[/sup] either. This board’s really gone to shit since the switch to paid subscriptions. ---
**Author:** ![WernhamHogg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/a587f6/32.png) [@WernhamHogg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WernhamHogg)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 4:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/78 "2004-03-26T16:31:32Z")
> [@Green Bean](#): > > Well, then, where’s your “Ask the Humorless Guy” thread? Huh? At least there’s no danger of Lynn mistaking it for a joke thread and locking it. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 6:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/79 "2004-03-26T18:48:01Z")
Worst. Thread. Ever. ---
**Author:** ![Michael\_Ellis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/977dab/32.png) [@Michael\_Ellis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Michael_Ellis)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2004, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365/80 "2004-03-26T19:05:25Z")
Underpants. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/solitary-and-mutual-wanking/236365.md?page=5)