# Some of the things I've learned watching Seinfeld **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 3, 2017, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721 "2017-08-03T22:17:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![Slash1972](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/slash1972/32/6461_2.png) [@Slash1972](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Slash1972)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 7:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/61 "2017-08-04T19:40:55Z")
Paying a prostitute for sex is okay, as long as she also cleans your apartment. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/62 "2017-08-04T20:04:18Z")
It’s impossible to get bad BO smell out of a BMW. ---
**Author:** ![friedo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/8edcca/32.png) [@friedo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/friedo)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/63 "2017-08-04T20:14:38Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > You can get gonorrhea from riding a tractor in a bathing suit. Our eyes met across the crowded hat store. I, a customer, and she, a coquettish haberdasher. ---
**Author:** ![AlsoNamedBort](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alsonamedbort/32/3213_2.png) [@AlsoNamedBort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlsoNamedBort)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/64 "2017-08-04T20:31:59Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > It’s impossible to get bad BO smell out of a BMW. Sidenote: I really wish the Mythbusters tested this. They went overboard by having dead pigs rot in a car for a month. I would like to see Adam not shower for a week, drive around for an hour, and then see what happens. ---
**Author:** ![Scoobysnax](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/c4cdca/32.png) [@Scoobysnax](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scoobysnax)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 8:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/65 "2017-08-04T20:50:04Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > It’s impossible to get bad BO smell out of a BMW. I thought it was a SAAB. You can’t even get it stolen if you park it in a bad neighborhood with the keys on the seat ---
**Author:** ![AlsoNamedBort](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/alsonamedbort/32/3213_2.png) [@AlsoNamedBort](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AlsoNamedBort)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 9:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/66 "2017-08-04T21:31:08Z")
If you get stuck in traffic, leave the car, take the license plates, scratch the serial number off the engine block, and then report the car stolen. ---
**Author:** ![Dallas\_Jones](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dallas_jones/32/3277_2.png) [@Dallas\_Jones](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dallas_Jones)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 10:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/67 "2017-08-04T22:33:32Z")
> [@blondebear](#): > > It’s impossible to get bad BO smell out of a BMW. Or a Lincoln. [http://www.theimproper.com/117136/matthew-mcconaughey/](http://www.theimproper.com/117136/matthew-mcconaughey/) ---
**Author:** ![John\_Mace](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_mace/32/185_2.png) [@John\_Mace](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Mace)\ **Post date:** [August 4, 2017, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/68 "2017-08-04T23:17:52Z")
> [@G0sp3l](#): > > Jimmy holds grudges > > it’s a long journey from Milan to Minsk And it can be quite erotic. I got a lot of problems with you people. They write that stuff off all the time. Never accept a gift from an old person. ---
**Author:** ![salinqmind](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/3ec8ea/32.png) [@salinqmind](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/salinqmind)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 12:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/69 "2017-08-05T00:43:29Z")
> [@Darren\_Garrison](#): > > Muffin bottoms are more trouble than they are worth. Just as, with the tsunami of cheap clothing flooding the entire world, the poor people in third-world countries are getting PICKY over donated clothing (they have an idea what’s in fashion, they have tv’s) - the poor people in NYC do not appreciate getting donated muffin ‘stumps’. They want the muffin tops, too, not your leftovers after cutting off the good stuff! ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/70 "2017-08-05T01:13:20Z")
A green Klein makes a nice wall decoration…even if you’re not a bike rider. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 3:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/71 "2017-08-05T03:12:09Z")
> [@John\_Mace](#): > > I got a lot of problems with you people. Oh, yeah? I’ll take you on. I’ll take on every single one of you! ---
**Author:** ![snfaulkner](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/snfaulkner/32/433_2.png) [@snfaulkner](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/snfaulkner)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 3:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/72 "2017-08-05T03:21:13Z")
I learned that Ukraine is not weak. Is strong! ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/73 "2017-08-05T03:34:08Z")
> [@cochrane](#): > > Oh, yeah? I’ll take you on. I’ll take on every single one of you! You want a piece of me? :dubious: ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/74 "2017-08-05T04:10:07Z")
Apparently employers frown upon you having sex with the office cleaning lady on your desk. ---
**Author:** ![Casey1505](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/dc4da7/32.png) [@Casey1505](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Casey1505)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 4:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/75 "2017-08-05T04:39:09Z")
> [@Trancephalic](#): > > Beefaroni. Beef-a-rino (copyright infringement sidestep, I guess) [QUOTE=Shoeless] It’s not a lie if you believe it. [/QUOTE] That only works in[Breaking Bad](http://www.huffingtonpost.com/2015/04/07/better-call-saul-breaking-bad-reference_n_7016702.html), unless it or was clipped from _Seinfeld_? ---
**Author:** ![jtur88](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/e9c0ed/32.png) [@jtur88](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jtur88)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 8:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/76 "2017-08-05T08:09:28Z")
Do not run over a sewing machine with a mail truck. ---
**Author:** ![BigT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bigt/32/12044_2.png) [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 8:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/77 "2017-08-05T08:14:39Z")
[ul] [li]That restaurant owners can deny you soup for any reason, and still have people like said restaurant.[/li][li]That there are restaurants that only serve one thing.[/li][li]That Florida is the retirement home for the Northeast, particularly if you’re Jewish. [/li][li]That sponges for ladies exist. [/li][li]That basses can sound like that (even if it is synthesized)[/li][li]That some people are really strange (once I found out George is based on a real person). [/li][li]That the platonic way to sleep with someone is head to foot[/li][/ul] ---
**Author:** ![Gaga75](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8797f3/32.png) [@Gaga75](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gaga75)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 10:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/78 "2017-08-05T10:31:17Z")
A muffin can be very filling ---
**Author:** ![flaming\_yawn](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/cab0a1/32.png) [@flaming\_yawn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/flaming_yawn)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/79 "2017-08-05T12:27:16Z")
I am going to hell because I ripped a Jesus fish off a car. ---
**Author:** ![cochrane](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/cochrane/32/10441_2.png) [@cochrane](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cochrane)\ **Post date:** [August 5, 2017, 12:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721/80 "2017-08-05T12:49:02Z")
> [@BigT](#): > > [ul] > [li]That some people are really strange (once I found out George is based on a real person). [/li][/ul] So is Kramer. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-of-the-things-ive-learned-watching-seinfeld/792721.md?page=5)