# Some questions about Chewbacca
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792
**Category:** Cafe Society
**Created:** [June 22, 2006, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792 "2006-06-22T23:48:07Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 5
### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 10:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/81 "2006-06-23T22:28:49Z")
> [@Cervaise](#):
>
> Or when I dip my nads in the bowl.
You lost me on that one, fella. đ
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 10:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/82 "2006-06-23T22:30:31Z")
> [@carnivorousplant](#):
>
> You lost me on that one, fella. đ
Other menâs urine on his testicle fur causes him to make odd noises.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 10:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/83 "2006-06-23T22:48:22Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#):
>
> Other menâs urine on his testicle fur causes him to make odd noises.
Ah.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 10:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/84 "2006-06-23T22:55:05Z")
I didnât know Cervaise was that short.
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### Author:  [@RickJay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RickJay)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 10:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/85 "2006-06-23T22:59:13Z")
> [@Diceman](#):
>
> Thatâs what Iâm thinking. Chewbaccaâs real name is probably something like Ohhh-Ack-Uh, and âChewbaccaâ is the closest thing that Han can say easily.
Simplification of names and words is pretty commonplace in these sorts of interactions, as anyone from North American should know; we borrowed about a thousand words from the Indians and made many of them about a third as long. âSquashâ comes from a word best described as âaskutaskwash.â Indian languages had some hideously complex, compound words the Europeans couldnât pronounce, featuring vowel sounds unfamiliar to anyone who spoke a European language, so they just did the best they could.
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### Author:  [@Happy\_Clam](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Happy_Clam)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 11:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/86 "2006-06-23T23:43:15Z")
> [@The Scrivener](#):
>
> Do protocol droids dream of electric sheep? Gawd, I hope not.
Only if theyâre built by **Hal Briston**.
Man, how did we get from some perfectly reasonable Chewie questions to talking about Wookie dongs and h@Wt droid sÂŁx in only two pages?
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 23, 2006, 11:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/87 "2006-06-23T23:58:33Z")
> [@Happy Clam](#):
>
> Man, how did we get from some perfectly reasonable Chewie questions to talking about Wookie dongs and h@Wt droid sÂŁx in only two pages?
As usual, it is NoClueâs fault.
đ
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [June 24, 2006, 12:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/88 "2006-06-24T00:16:26Z")
:eek:
đ
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### Author:  [@Fish](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fish)
#### Post date: [June 24, 2006, 12:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/89 "2006-06-24T00:20:37Z")
> [@Happy Clam](#):
>
> Man, how did we get from some perfectly reasonable Chewie questions to talking about Wookie dongs and h@Wt droid sÂŁx in only two pages?
Why did it **take** us two pages?
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### Author:  [@Anaamika](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Anaamika)
#### Post date: [June 24, 2006, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/90 "2006-06-24T01:15:21Z")
> [@adam yax](#):
>
> Does anything bring out the nitpicks like Star Wars?
Oh, no. Even I come out to nitpick SW, funny enough. I havenât found anything yet in this thread but Iâm sure there will be.
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### Author:  [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)
#### Post date: [June 25, 2006, 3:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/91 "2006-06-25T15:53:24Z")
Iâve never thought about it before, but just how do Wookies keep themselves clean, anyway, especially since theyâve got apparently such uniformly furry asses? And why am I afraid Chewie has contrived a very personal app for the Millenium Falconâs hydrospanners for this purpose? (Of course I could be wrong about that, but itâs a safe assumption that they do keep good hygiene somehow, otherwise the Fox Studios suits wouldâve ordered them covered them up with _Lederhosen_ or something.) đ
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### Author:  [@Cervaise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cervaise)
#### Post date: [June 25, 2006, 5:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/92 "2006-06-25T17:45:04Z")
> [@The Scrivener](#):
>
> Iâve never thought about it before, but just how do Wookies keep themselves clean, anyway, especially since theyâve got apparently such uniformly furry asses?
Considering how owners of long-hair cats need to help with grooming, perhaps Han spends an hour every week clipping Chewbaccaâs dingleberries. I smell scat slashâŚ
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [June 25, 2006, 8:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/93 "2006-06-25T20:54:30Z")
SCAT SLASH FEVER!!!
my fave C3P-Nugent song
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### Author:  [@Scissorjack](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scissorjack)
#### Post date: [June 25, 2006, 10:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/94 "2006-06-25T22:17:54Z")
> [@Happy Clam](#):
>
> Who needs her? The ewok alone is enough!
>
> Mmm, wriggly.
And his bandolier contains duct tape. _Lots_ of duct tape.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 25, 2006, 11:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/95 "2006-06-25T23:22:42Z")
> [@Case Sensitive](#):
>
> duct tape. _Lots_ of duct tape.
Kinky.
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### Author:  [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)
#### Post date: [June 26, 2006, 12:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/96 "2006-06-26T00:18:53Z")
> [@NoClueBoy](#):
>
> âRowr-a-waar badges, meow meow? We rowrr-err-waarra donât need no rowrarr-er-rawr badges, meow meow!â"
Since when did Chewbacca become Henrietta Pussycat?
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### Author:  [@AncientHumanoid](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AncientHumanoid)
#### Post date: [June 26, 2006, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/97 "2006-06-26T00:32:00Z")
> [@mobo85](#):
>
> Since when did Chewbacca become Henrietta Pussycat?
I was wondering when someone was gonna notice.
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### Author:  [@FisherQueen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/FisherQueen)
#### Post date: [June 26, 2006, 12:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/98 "2006-06-26T00:42:46Z")
There is a perfectly good reason for Han to repeat back to Chewbacca, in Standard, what Chewbacca just said in Wookie.
Han is, after all, not perfectly fluent in Wookie. He echoes what he heard to confirm that he is translating correctly, so as to avoid tragic misunderstandings.
Chewbacca: ARRRGH! RUUUU! REEIEIIEI!
Han: Yes, I agree, we really should kill the waiter and at least two-thirds of the kitchen staff.
Chewbacca: REEIEIEIII!
Han: Oh, sorry, buddy, I misunderstood. Waiter, my friend would like another order of buffalo wings.
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### Author:  [@Chronos](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chronos)
#### Post date: [June 26, 2006, 1:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/99 "2006-06-26T01:00:14Z")
> [@](#):
>
> A little likeâŚ
>
> Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger MUSHROOM MUSHROOM!!
>
> Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger MUSHROOM MUSHROOM!!
>
> Badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badger badgerâŚ
>
> SNAKE! A SNAKE! OOOOOH, ITâS A SNAKE!!
Almost⌠Thereâs only eleven âbadgersâ before the Mushroom, MUSHROOM!; you have twelve.
> [@](#):
>
> Barring any evidence to the contrary, I prefer to believe that Chewie is carrying around a metric shitload of condoms.
How many Wookie condoms would it take to comprise a metric shitload, anyway? Iâm guessing not more than 2 or 3.
And I donât know about Wookie vocalizations, but if you take the neck and mouthpiece off of a sousaphone, and âplayâ it as though it were still attached to the instrument, it sounds _exactly_ like a Tauntaun.
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### Author:  [@carnivorousplant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnivorousplant)
#### Post date: [June 26, 2006, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/some-questions-about-chewbacca/361792/100 "2006-06-26T01:53:11Z")
> [@Chronos](#):
>
> How many Wookie condoms would it take to comprise a metric shitload, anyway?
If one goes by gorillas, whose teeth are larger than there willies, a, well, shitload. đ
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