# Someone Needs to Invent
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689
**Category:** In My Humble Opinion
**Created:** [January 31, 2022, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689 "2022-01-31T16:20:40Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/1 "2022-01-31T16:20:40Z")
It looks like this topic was brought up in 2008. I think it’s time it was revisited.
A couch cover that stays on the couch. I keep our couch and loveseat covered because that’s where the dogs can usually be found. I’ve tried covers specifically made for dogs, blankets, sheets, actual couch covers but with all of them, I am constantly adjusting and retucking. I must spend a total of an hour every day doing this. It drives me crazy. It also needs to be easily washed and dried and easy to put on.
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/2 "2022-01-31T16:29:56Z")
A clothes dryer where the vent outlet is somewhere accessible.
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### Author:  [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Qadgop_the_Mercotan)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/3 "2022-01-31T19:24:00Z")
A de-pickler for cucumbers, for when you’ve turned too many of your cucumbers into pickles and the Mrs. announces she wants fresh cucumber slices on her salad.
A de-pickler would be handy for turning alcoholics back into normal drinkers too, and about as possible as the cucumber one. .
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### Author:  [@Horatius](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Horatius)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/4 "2022-01-31T20:14:56Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#):
>
> A clothes dryer where the vent outlet is somewhere accessible.
Honestly, any appliance where things you’re supposed to clear regularly are accessible. I was recently trying to diagnose a problem with my dishwasher, and one suggested fix was to clean the filters, which you’re apparently supposed to do regularly. Except the filter was placed on the very bottom of the dishwasher, at the very back, and held on by four small screws that were very hard to remove. We ended up having to have a small child crawl halfway into the thing to get those screws out!
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 9:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/5 "2022-01-31T21:30:34Z")
> [@Horatius](#):
>
> Honestly, any appliance where things you’re supposed to clear regularly are accessible.
Testify!
> [@Qadgop\_the\_Mercotan](#):
>
> A de-pickler for cucumbers, for when you’ve turned too many of your cucumbers into pickles and the Mrs. announces she wants fresh cucumber slices on her salad.
>
> A de-pickler would be handy for turning alcoholics back into normal drinkers too, and about as possible as the cucumber one. .
If you ever get tired of going by **Q-t-M** , I think **The De-pickler** would be a socko moniker!
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### Author:  [@Steve\_MB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Steve_MB)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/6 "2022-01-31T21:36:46Z")
> [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](#):
>
> If you ever get tired of going by **Q-t-M** , I think **The De-pickler** would be a socko moniker!
Sounds like an arch-enemy for the [Condiment King](https://www.cbr.com/batman-condiment-king-cheesiest-villain/).
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/7 "2022-01-31T21:41:33Z")
^ You made my day!
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### Author:  [@Napier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Napier)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 9:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/8 "2022-01-31T21:53:25Z")
Seat belts that actually retract.
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### Author:  [@BigT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BigT)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 10:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/9 "2022-01-31T22:22:26Z")
A smartphone keyboard app that detects accidental touches. Just delay closing the keyborad for a short period, and then don’t close it if the person keeps on typing.
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### Author:  [@AskNott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/AskNott)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 11:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/10 "2022-01-31T23:10:14Z")
You’ve all heard of stents, those little springy tubes a surgeon can put into a coronary artery by remote control to forestall having to do a full-scale bypass surgery. Why can’t somebody make one for prostates?
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### Author:  [@mbh](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mbh)
#### Post date: [January 31, 2022, 11:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/11 "2022-01-31T23:12:18Z")
I want some enterprising genetic engineer to produce a critter that is basically a stomach and a tooth. You feed it, and it produces ivory. It’s purpose is to make ivory so plentiful, and so cheap, that elephant-poaching becomes unprofitable.
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### Author:  [@jaycat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jaycat)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 1:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/12 "2022-02-01T01:08:08Z")
> [@Napier](#):
>
> Seat belts that actually retract.
Seat belts that don’t get caught in the car door.
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### Author:  [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 1:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/13 "2022-02-01T01:15:09Z")
The shoulder belt needs to come out of the seat itself (up near the headrest) and not off the doorframe where it cuts your frickin’ throat.
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### Author:  [@lobotomyboy63](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lobotomyboy63)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 1:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/14 "2022-02-01T01:44:29Z")
> [@Napier](#):
>
> Seat belts that actually retract.
> [@jaycat](#):
>
> Seat belts that don’t get caught in the car door.
Mrs. L remarked tonight that our Subaru’s often fail to retract. My bro said one time he thought it was an issue with Japanese cars. I’ve noticed they don’t always retract on our Korean car, too. Pick as many as you need (I realize some people have multiple cars and may have mixed results).
_Poll ([view on site](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/14))_
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### Author:  [@LivingGhost371](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/LivingGhost371)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/15 "2022-02-01T04:12:36Z")
A compartment in your car to keep your pizza or fast-food warm on the drive home.
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### Author:  [@JohnGalt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnGalt)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/16 "2022-02-01T04:44:28Z")
An anti-microwave, that would rapidly cool or freeze food or drinks in like 30 seconds
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### Author:  [@GaryM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GaryM)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 5:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/17 "2022-02-01T05:05:37Z")
Here you go:
[AntiGriddle](https://www.hotelrestaurantsupply.com/MAT-073555.html?msclkid=5ac993aa85231ce8e24ef2523a7faa9d&utm_source=bing&utm_medium=cpc&utm_campaign=**LP%20-%20Shop%20-%20Shopping%20-%20Misc&utm_term=4587918428503212&utm_content=MAT-073555%20%7C%20Matfer%20Bourgeat%20Polyscience%20Breville%20Anti-griddle%20,%2015-7%2F%20%7C%20%242049.6)
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### Author:  [@thorny\_locust](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/thorny_locust)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 5:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/18 "2022-02-01T05:08:12Z")
> [@jaycat](#):
>
> > [@Napier](#):
> >
> > Seat belts that actually retract.
>
> Seat belts that don’t get caught in the car door.
Seat belts that are designed for people with breasts.
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### Author:  [@Gatopescado](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gatopescado)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 7:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/19 "2022-02-01T07:07:00Z")
Teleportation. Think of a place you want to be, and _bingo_ you are there.
Yeah, I know. I might have to wait a bit.
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### Author:  [@eschereal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/eschereal)
#### Post date: [February 1, 2022, 7:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/someone-needs-to-invent/958689/20 "2022-02-01T07:38:24Z")
Seatbelts that are constructed of a couple dozen 1mm Kevlar cords loosely woven into a tube, with no buckle: you put the belt into a metal hook (sort of like a one-and-a-half-turn corkscrew) that holds it securely without any mechanical parts, and the tube flattens out where it lays on you (I absolutely despise the edges of seatbelts, and those fleece things always have to be slid into place).
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