# Something about you that's TMI **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [November 18, 2008, 2:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276 "2008-11-18T14:25:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 8
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/141 "2008-11-20T18:53:21Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > Yeah, my arms aren’t long enough. > > Joe Your arms aren’t long enough? Are you a Tyrannosaurus Rex or something? ---
**Author:** ![Khan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/3ab097/32.png) [@Khan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Khan)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 7:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/142 "2008-11-20T19:00:28Z")
> [@Beware\_of\_Doug](#): > > This is comparatively lame-o, but when I was under the gas having my deviated septum fixed, the doctor had occasion to stick a rattail file up my nose and \*shkk shkk \*down some protruding bony points inside. After which I had, like, _collar stays_ stitched down inside my nostrils for about 4 days. And said nose was all wrapped up in tape, and I couldn’t blow it or pick it or nothing although it dripped like a motherfuck. When I had this done back in '03 the doc stuffed some antibiotic-laced sponges up there along with a silicone tube in each so I could breathe. Like yours, it dripped a lot too. We taped a piece of gauze underneath my nostrils to collect the drippings. This was shortly after Christmas during my senior year in college. Lying on the couch watching 007 movie marathons while sopping up crud from my packed nostrils is an experience, let me tell you. When the ENT took them out after the prescribed 72 hours or so, he also removed several chunks of clot-ridden mucus that were about an inch-and-a-half long and a centimeter wide. They resembled strips of very dark raw fish. I suspect they had built up between my turbinates. I was impressed by just how much stuff fit in my nasal cavity. And there’s nothing quite like the sensation of having something so large adhering to your nasal mucosa being simply peeled off. It didn’t hurt, since he’d sprayed some kind of numbing agent into my nostrils beforehand (can you spray lidocaine?). I provided counter-tension by pulling my head back as he pulled at the clots. I was then given several 1L bottles of normal saline and a 60mL syringe with which to flush my nostrils periodically. Using the syringe made it feel like I was being FORCED to snort back a loogie, and the way some of the saline came back out of my other nostril was the coolest thing. I kept this up for the next couple of weeks. While they never reached the size of the things my ENT pulled out of there, they were still impressive compared to the size of my conventional boogers. With the small amount of blood in each they were very sticky; some of them wouldn’t wash out so I had to gently tug them out with a tweezer. The _crystalline_ quality they had was unique–like amber, but with little wisps of maroon. This experience gave me a whole new respect for my nasal cavity. But the most practical lesson was that you really do have to dig deep to find anything interesting. 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Yorikke](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yorikke/32/4335_2.png) [@Yorikke](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yorikke)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/143 "2008-11-20T20:02:29Z")
> [@Cluricaun](#): > > Your arms aren’t long enough? Are you a Tyrannosaurus Rex or something? No, just fat, thanks. Joe ---
**Author:** ![DooWahDiddy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/e9bcb4/32.png) [@DooWahDiddy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DooWahDiddy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/144 "2008-11-20T20:04:00Z")
> [@melodyharmonius](#): > > Sorry for the hijack on that one. I was diagnosed this year and hate for anyone else to get crohn’s disease when they don’t have to! > > Maybe this will help? > > This weekend I had my first group sex - I was being touched, finger fucked, motor boated, vibrated, dildoed, pinched, squeezed, teased and kissed all over. Then I had to excuse myself because of a massive bout of IBS that lasted the rest of the night. :smack: Expect your friend count to dramatically increase soon. ---
**Author:** ![Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hazle_Weatherfield)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/145 "2008-11-20T20:15:51Z")
> [@DooWahDiddy](#): > > Expect your friend count to dramatically increase soon. Do you know what IBS is?:smack: ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/146 "2008-11-20T20:22:57Z")
> [@The New and Improved Superman](#): > > Wellll, since you’ve admitted it…I wouldn’t go as far as calling myself a prostitute, but I have (on only a few rare occasions) accepted money for sex, from guys I wouldn’t even think of having sex with in any other circumstance. None of this kind of qualifying for me - I worked in both a brothel and for a pimp. Oh, sorry, I mean “massage parlour” and “escort service”. Didn’t do either for very long though, it’s not like I left school always wanting to sell my arse. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/147 "2008-11-20T20:27:55Z")
I used to be prone to nosebleeds in the wintertime – all that dry air, I guess. Once I was struck with a pretty bad one at work (I worked in a clothing store as a salesman back then). I couldn’t work the sales floor with a blood-soaked paper towel clutched to my face, so I was sitting in the back room with a wad of paper toweling wedged in my nose and my head tilted back, waiting for the gore to stop. After about ten minutes of pressure, I decided to check to see if it was safe for democracy up there. I slowly tugged on the paper that I’d plugged my nostril with, and I realized I could feel something moving way up at the top of my nasal cavity. I slowly pulled the plug of paper toweling out of my nose and stared in horrified fascination as a partially clotted, arterially red, glistening slug of blood (and I guess mucus) crawled out of my face. It was about the size of a vienna sausage and had a consistency in between a warmed gummi bear and Jell-O. I flushed it and waited for signs of additional bleeding; none were forthcoming, so I returned to the front of the store, where I immediately sold someone a dark red, glossy silk necktie. I’m sure the customer was wondering why I kept staring at his tie. ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/148 "2008-11-20T20:38:13Z")
> [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](#): > > Do you know what IBS is?:smack: Duh, why else would we want to be her friend? :rolleyes: 😛 ---
**Author:** ![Hostile\_Dialect](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/e495f1/32.png) [@Hostile\_Dialect](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hostile_Dialect)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/149 "2008-11-20T20:39:50Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > squoze I am in love with this word. > [@Great Dave](#): > > They have these wonderful things called moist wipes. All the cleanliness of a bidet, with the convenience of tp. A lot of folks in this thread should give them a try. For that matter, some of the folks in this thread should really just jump straight to Preparation H wipes as a preemptive strike. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/150 "2008-11-20T20:52:42Z")
> [@Santo\_Rugger](#): > > How much did he pay you for _that_? Nothing! Not a goddamn thing. Can you believe it? ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/151 "2008-11-20T20:56:09Z")
> [@Southern\_Yankee](#): > > Wait.. I missed another Charlotte Dopefest? :eek: That’s some funny shit right there. And no, you didn’t. Despite all the hints we tried dropping for **MissMossie**. 😉 Although I do suspect attendence will be higher at the next one. ---
**Author:** ![KneadToKnow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kneadtoknow/32/3999_2.png) [@KneadToKnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KneadToKnow)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 8:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/152 "2008-11-20T20:58:32Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > No, just fat, thanks. > > Joe Awwwww. ☹ We still love you, dude. But I doubt you’ll be left alone with the flatware by anyone here anytime soon. ---
**Author:** ![Chef\_Troy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/85f322/32.png) [@Chef\_Troy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chef_Troy)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/153 "2008-11-20T21:03:04Z")
> [@Hazle\_Weatherfield](#): > > Do you know what IBS is?:smack: Well… it stands for “Intramural Butt Sex.” doesn’t it? ---
**Author:** ![Cluricaun](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/bb73d2/32.png) [@Cluricaun](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Cluricaun)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/154 "2008-11-20T21:07:47Z")
> [@wheresgeorge04](#): > > No, just fat, thanks. > > Joe :smack: Sorry. ---
**Author:** ![Henrichek](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/5daacb/32.png) [@Henrichek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Henrichek)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/155 "2008-11-20T21:08:51Z")
> [@Ellen\_Cherry](#): > > Why oh WHY do I read these things?! :eek: :: ptooo :: :eek: > > I’ve given birth, several times, and while a giant TMI experience in general, it’s not something a lot of people here haven’t experienced, so … I’ll just say, have any of you SEEN a placenta? That is one oogie looking thing, lemme tell ya. So.. you ate it? Eww! ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/156 "2008-11-20T21:10:00Z")
> [@Great\_Dave](#): > > They have these wonderful things called moist wipes. All the cleanliness of a bidet, with the convenience of tp. A lot of folks in this thread should give them a try. ARGH!!! I can’t resist! Here is an email written by a teammate after a weekend rugby trip three years ago. > [@](#): > > These are things that **Santo Rugger** (Pygmy Rugger at the time) > actually said or did this weekend during a rugby trip to Vail with the Santos. > All of these actually happened and nothing is made up. > > \*Filled a pocket full of wet wipe packets before leaving. When asked what > they were for, said they were to clean his penis. Why does he need that? > Because chicks turn him down for oral based on how dirty it is and he > doesnt want that to happen this weekend. > > \*He arrived in Santa Fe on Tuesday. Practiced three times, played three > games over the weekend and on the trip home Sunday evening, admitted he > hadn’t showered since arriving in Santa Fe. > > \*Before leaving on Friday afternoon, he and Pablo had to finish a book > report that was supposed to be turned in that day. They had put it off > until 3:00 when we were supposed to leave at 2. When finished, between > the two of them, they had over 100 spell check errors in 5 pages of > writing. > > \*On the trip up, had been wanting gas station nachos since we left. Finds > some in Taos but the cheese is so old, it won’t come out of the machine. > He dis-assembles the machine all over the counter and squeezes the bag to > get the cheese out. Eats all of the chips and then licks the container to > get all of the cheese. Two hours later, still stuck in the car, and his > ass almost makes himself sick. > > \*The social on Saturday was held on the third story of a bar. **Santo** ends > up wandering into an empty room and finds a backpack. Since the backpack > is extremely light, he figures it must be full of drugs. Takes the > backpack and throws it off the balcony. Someone yells “Hey, that’s my > backpack!”. **Rugger** takes off downstairs, grabs back pack and sprints off > into the night. After about 500 meters, stops and hides the backpack > behind a random rock. Collects himself and goes back to the bar. Never > looks in the backpack and forgets about it. Rest of the weekend, tries to > convince us to stop and look for it, he doesn’t know where it is but he’s > sure he can find it. > > _Next morning is talking to Santos (the team), one of the guys says he did a > terrible job of talking to girls last night. Apparently, he went up to a table of girls > and said, “So do any of you want to go back to my hotel and pull on my > penis for a while?” None did. > \*\* > On the way home, reveals that he had brought his two nut coozies, just in > case he needed them this weekend. **Rugger** ’s nut coozies are just what they > sound like. They are coverings so that if he ends up have double > penetration with a girl and another guy, their nuts won’t touch and it > won’t be gay. He always carries a spare in case the other guy doesn’t have > one._ (This one is my favorite. :D) > > \*All trip he had been text messaging a girl. Finally he announces in a > sad tone that he’s going to have to fuck a fat girl when he gets back to > Socorro. Further discussion about fat girl loving reveals that sometimes > he’s with girls so ugly or fat that he has to close his eyes and pretend > he’s masturbating just to get off. > > \*Halfway home and he declares he’s turtle heading. A few minutes later he > starts laughing. So twenty minutes later as we all jump out of the van at > a gas station, he calmly sits in the back and calls said fat girl. “Hey, > we’re going to be a little late, I just Shat myself.” How classy is the > girl? Her response: “Ewwww, so what time are you going to be back then?” > > \*He won’t go to the bathroom at the same gas station because he can’t find > his shoes so he wishes to just ride it out until Santa Fe. After finding > him shoes and forcing him into the bathroom, he returns with a bathroom > deodorizer that he found under the toilet. It is just an open bottle of > pure chemical stank that he says will mask the smell of his gas. The > chemical smell gives headaches and sore throats for the remainder of the > trip. And doesn’t cover the smell of **Rugger** ’s ass. > > All of the information above is truthful and actually occurred in the > course of 3 days. His defining words of wisdom: > > “Smile at the pretty girls and Fuck the fat ones.” And that was just one weekend! ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/157 "2008-11-20T21:14:00Z")
**Santo** - I don’t think I’ve ever wanted you more. ---
**Author:** ![Santo\_Rugger](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e95f7d/32.png) [@Santo\_Rugger](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Santo_Rugger)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/158 "2008-11-20T21:29:39Z")
Well, I showered on Tuesday, but I don’t have any wet naps. Plus, I’m on a diet, so at least a couple of those stories don’t apply any more. At least, the ones having to do with my eating and evacuation habits. 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Illuminatiprimus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/illuminatiprimus/32/11520_2.png) [@Illuminatiprimus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Illuminatiprimus)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/159 "2008-11-20T21:35:51Z")
But those were the bits I found the most attractive! ---
**Author:** ![Giltathriel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b38774/32.png) [@Giltathriel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Giltathriel)\ **Post date:** [November 20, 2008, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276/160 "2008-11-20T21:49:38Z")
I rather enjoy picking my nose when no one is looking. I’ve never had an orgasm, though not for lack of trying. (At least, if I have then they are much less exciting than hoped) [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276.md?page=7) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/something-about-you-thats-tmi/473276.md?page=9)