# Songs about masturbation. **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 10, 2005, 11:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202 "2005-05-10T11:13:05Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 3:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/21 "2005-05-10T15:21:59Z")
AC DC’s “Big Balls” isn’t about it per se but does allude to it at one point. ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 3:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/22 "2005-05-10T15:34:12Z")
“Touch Myself,” I think, by T-Boz (of TLC) & Richie Rich. ---
**Author:** ![Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac8455/32.png) [@Bippy\_the\_Beardless](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bippy_the_Beardless)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 3:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/23 "2005-05-10T15:38:22Z")
“I can feel it coming in the air tonight” by Phil Collins ? ---
**Author:** ![Lambo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecc23a/32.png) [@Lambo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lambo)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/24 "2005-05-10T16:14:24Z")
‘Get a Grip’ by Semisonic. ---
**Author:** ![Dancer\_Flight](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dancer_flight/32/7601_2.png) [@Dancer\_Flight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dancer_Flight)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/25 "2005-05-10T16:19:49Z")
“Icicle” by Tori Amos ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/26 "2005-05-10T16:20:29Z")
“One More Minute” by Weird Al Yankovic (it’s not all about masturbation, but it does contain the line: “I’m stranded all alone at the Gas Station of Love And I have to use the self-service pumps…” 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Incubus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c68b51/32.png) [@Incubus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Incubus)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/27 "2005-05-10T16:28:48Z")
“She Bop” by Cyndi Lauper ---
**Author:** ![Little\_Bird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/3ec8ea/32.png) [@Little\_Bird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Little_Bird)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/28 "2005-05-10T16:39:22Z")
“Blister in the Sun” - The Violent Femmes Here’s a [whole list](http://www.nadamucho.com/Music_223.html)! ---
**Author:** ![My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f14d63/32.png) [@My\_Darn\_Snake\_Legs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Darn_Snake_Legs)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/29 "2005-05-10T16:55:26Z")
“Playmate of the Year” by Zebrahead. ---
**Author:** ![gotpasswords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/c57346/32.png) [@gotpasswords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gotpasswords)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 5:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/30 "2005-05-10T17:50:02Z")
Springsteen’s \*Blinded By The Light \* - Don’t have the exact line handy, but “as the adolescent boy pumps his way into his hat” ---
**Author:** ![Skywatcher](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/skywatcher/32/254_2.png) [@Skywatcher](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skywatcher)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 5:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/31 "2005-05-10T17:54:43Z")
> [@Little Bird](#): > > Here’s a [whole list](http://www.nadamucho.com/Music_223.html)! “God Bless the USA”?! 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Liberal](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/848f3c/32.png) [@Liberal](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Liberal)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 6:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/32 "2005-05-10T18:00:04Z")
**Sodomy** from Hair ---
**Author:** ![Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/troy_mcclure_sf/32/4150_2.png) [@Troy\_McClure\_SF](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Troy_McClure_SF)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 6:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/33 "2005-05-10T18:18:31Z")
_Paulina_\* by No Doubt. ---
**Author:** ![Infovore](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/infovore/32/420_2.png) [@Infovore](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Infovore)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/34 "2005-05-10T18:20:08Z")
> [@Liberal](#): > > **Sodomy** from Hair Sounds painful. Do you have to freeze the hair first? Otherwise, it… …what? …oh… Never mind. 😛 ---
**Author:** ![ShibbOleth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/848f3c/32.png) [@ShibbOleth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ShibbOleth)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/35 "2005-05-10T19:01:42Z")
> [@F. U. Shakespeare](#): > > **ShibbOleth** , don’t you mean, “Longview”? :smack: In my defense, I suppose that after a while it could make you a basket case. ---
**Author:** ![Draelin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/ce73a5/32.png) [@Draelin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Draelin)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/36 "2005-05-10T19:07:00Z")
> [@ShibbOleth](#): > > In my defense, I suppose that after a while it could make you a basket case. Just before you go blind. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![rjung](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/45deac/32.png) [@rjung](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/rjung)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 7:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/37 "2005-05-10T19:35:25Z")
[“Firing the Surgeon General,”](http://www.roysongs.com/lyrics/foremen/folkreprise/firing.htm) complete with MP3. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![devilsknew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/4da419/32.png) [@devilsknew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/devilsknew)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/38 "2005-05-10T20:39:38Z")
Rodney Carrington’s [_Dear Penis_](http://www.rodneycarrington.com/dearpenis.php) ---
**Author:** ![Mona\_Lott](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ee7513/32.png) [@Mona\_Lott](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mona_Lott)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 10:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/39 "2005-05-10T22:10:49Z")
**Imaginary Lover** by Atlanta Rhythm Section. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Scrivener](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/eada6e/32.png) [@The\_Scrivener](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Scrivener)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2005, 10:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202/40 "2005-05-10T22:12:59Z")
[“He’s My Best Friend”](http://www.sing365.com/music/lyric.nsf/He's-My-Best-Friend-lyrics-Jellyfish/C0230BEC0F5DB50548256E8D0006CDE8) – Jellyfish [“Pink Thing”](http://chalkhills.org/reelbyreal/s_Pink.html) – XTC. Yep, this one’s a double entendre, about both Andy P’s penis and his baby boy. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-about-masturbation/303202.md?page=3)