# Songs that make you want to stick pencils in your ears **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [June 27, 2019, 4:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163 "2019-06-27T16:21:41Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 4
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 5:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/61 "2019-06-28T05:01:08Z")
The Doobie Brothers’ “Music Is The Doctor” and the Beach Boys’ “Kokomo” are tied with Wilson Phillips’ “Hold On” for the worst song that won’t go away. ---
**Author:** ![panache45](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/panache45/32/64_2.png) [@panache45](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/panache45)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/62 "2019-06-28T11:37:00Z")
> [@gkster](#): > > “Christmas Shoes” - thank goodness that one gets airplay only a few months a year OMFG, yes! I’d rather listen to Florence Foster Jenkins. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 11:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/63 "2019-06-28T11:55:41Z")
> [@Grestarian](#): > > Are you talking about …well…90% of her catalogue because that’s just her vocal range or are you talking about that disgusting let’s show the world I’m (not) just as good as Olivia Newton-John and remake her “Loving You” and butcher the signature aria? I also love Olivia, but I must tell you that “Loving You” was not her song. That was [Minnie Riperton](https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Minnie_Riperton). ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/64 "2019-06-28T13:27:14Z")
And that Tom Jones’s classic “Why Why Why Delilah.” Why why why did you record this song? The scariest thing about the Kars for Kids song is it was recorded after Johnny Cash died. What did they do, zombify him? ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/65 "2019-06-28T13:27:26Z")
“Teddy Bear” --Red Sovine “Billy, Don’t be a Hero” – Bo Donaldson & The Heywoods “Run, Joey, Run” – David Geddes (Especially the part at the end where the girl dies, shot by her own father.) (Joey don’t share food!) ---
**Author:** ![Treppenwitz](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/treppenwitz/32/3445_2.png) [@Treppenwitz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Treppenwitz)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/66 "2019-06-28T13:28:28Z")
> [@Procrustus](#): > > The worst song ever to hit the radio repeats this about 80 times (and does nothing else) > [@](#): > > Right about now > The funk soul brother > Check it out now > The funk soul brother Rockerfeller Skank by Fatboy Slim. Well - You have a point. But there are reasons to like it: it rescued the Just Brothers from obscurity, because without their [Sliced Tomatoes](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=_yPcvjq5EVg) it would be no more than a shadow of itself. Plus Norman sponsors (or at least, used to sponsor) a youth football club in Brighton. So Hats Off, and I’ll give him a pass. j ETA: and I meant to say, upthread someone mentioned My Way. Oh God yes. ---
**Author:** ![Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/b2d939/32.png) [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser\_1](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Go_Arachnid_Laser_1)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/67 "2019-06-28T13:40:39Z")
My number one most hated song is without a doubt, the X-Ambassadors with [Renegades](https://youtu.be/8j741TUIET0). And I say hey, hey hey hey Living like we’re renegades Hey hey hey Hey hey hey Living like we’re renegades Renegades, renegades All hail the underdogs All hail the new kids All hail the outlaws Spielberg’s and Kubrick’s There’s so many, sooooo many things to hate here. The hipsterism. The faux-folkish sound. The laziness of the lyrics. The repetition of the same chords and basing a whole song on a terrible chorus. The fact that they’re the blandest, most boring band in existence and they make a song talking about what a bunch of rebels they are. Aggggggghhhh!!! ---
**Author:** ![SuntanLotion](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suntanlotion/32/16165_2.png) [@SuntanLotion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SuntanLotion)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/68 "2019-06-28T13:52:50Z")
> [@Treppenwitz](#): > > ETA: and I meant to say, upthread someone mentioned My Way. Oh God yes. Sid Vicious’s cover was great ---
**Author:** ![WOOKINPANUB](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wookinpanub/32/132_2.png) [@WOOKINPANUB](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/WOOKINPANUB)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/69 "2019-06-28T13:57:43Z")
> [@Go\_Arachnid\_Laser](#): > > My number one most hated song is without a doubt, the X-Ambassadors with [Renegades](https://youtu.be/8j741TUIET0). > > And I say hey, hey hey hey > Living like we’re renegades > Hey hey hey > Hey hey hey > Living like we’re renegades > Renegades, renegades > All hail the underdogs > All hail the new kids > All hail the outlaws > Spielberg’s and Kubrick’s > > There’s so many, sooooo many things to hate here. The hipsterism. The faux-folkish sound. The laziness of the lyrics. The repetition of the same chords and basing a whole song on a terrible chorus. The fact that they’re the blandest, most boring band in existence and they make a song talking about what a bunch of rebels they are. Aggggggghhhh!!! I don’t mind the music but, hell yes, that “we’re rebels” and “they” can’t keep us down bullshit always ruins a song for me. Several years ago Muse had a hit with the song _Uprising_(oh please :rolleyes:) which I always thought was called Victorious. Great, energetic music but this “They will not force us They will stop degrading us They will not control us We will be victorious (So come on)” just pisses me off for some reason. ---
**Author:** ![TRC4941](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trc4941/32/6792_2.png) [@TRC4941](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TRC4941)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 2:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/70 "2019-06-28T14:12:07Z")
I know I will continue to think of songs to put on this list all day long. Lady in Red - Chris de Burgh Anything by Bob Dylan - especially Lay Lady Lay Having My Baby - Paul Anka Wonderful Tonight - Eric Clapton We Built this City - Jefferson Starship Me & Mrs Jones - Billy Paul Anything by the Doobie Brothers with Michael McDonald Physical - Olivia Newton John Feelings - Morris Albert Anything by Wings Ebony & Ivory - McCartney & Wonder ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/71 "2019-06-28T15:00:50Z")
> [@Grestarian](#): > > Are you talking about …well…90% of her catalogue because that’s just her vocal range or are you talking about that disgusting let’s show the world I’m (not) just as good as Olivia Newton-John and remake her “Loving You” and butcher the signature aria? Fine, you made me look it up. It is [Emotion](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=NrJEFrth27Q). A perfectly mindless pop song until about 2:45 into it, she decides to show the world her upper range for no reason. I have to turn the radio off when I realize it is coming. ---
**Author:** ![DSYoungEsq](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/c6cbf5/32.png) [@DSYoungEsq](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DSYoungEsq)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 3:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/72 "2019-06-28T15:06:04Z")
> [@xizor](#): > > I don’t know the name of the song, but there is something by Mariah Carey where she starts screeching in the middle of the song trying to get as high pitched as possible, perhaps to break a wine glass. “Emotion” I believe. ---
**Author:** ![chela](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chela/32/21582_2.png) [@chela](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/chela)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 3:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/73 "2019-06-28T15:12:51Z")
**Go away little girl** Go away little girl Go away little girl I’m not supposed to be alone with you Oh yes I know that your lips are sweet But our lips must never meet I belong to somebody else and I must be true. **She’s a Lady** Well she’s all you’d ever want She’s the kind they’d like to flaunt and take to dinner Well she always knows her place She’s got style, she’s got grace, She’s a winner She’s a Lady. Whoa whoa whoa, She’s a Lady Talkin’ about that little lady, and the lady is mine ick ick ick ick, sharpen that pencil quick quick quick ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 3:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/74 "2019-06-28T15:16:14Z")
One Hell of a Woman – Mac Davis _She’s one hell of a woman Young, strong and tame_ _Puke Smiley_ ---
**Author:** ![BrickBat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ac91a4/32.png) [@BrickBat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BrickBat)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 4:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/75 "2019-06-28T16:10:30Z")
> [@Just\_Asking\_Questions](#): > > Paradise by the Dashboard Light. > > It might not be a “pencils in ears” song, but it definitely a “gopher” song. I gopher the knob as soon as it comes on. Fortunately, the need to do that has virtually gone to zero thanks to iTunes. Yeah, it’s pretty revolting to hear today, though I never liked it back in the 70s either. Mawkish beyond belief. It’s also been my observation that those people who love this song ( still today ) tend to be immature airheads. Runner up would be ‘Run Joey Run’. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/76 "2019-06-28T17:52:24Z")
“Hot for Teacher” - Van Halen. Generally I like Van Halen, but this…ew. “It’s My Party” and “Judy’s Turn to Cry”, especially the latter. WTF, the guy left you for your best friend, and you’re taking him BACK??? Kick his ass to the curb, girl! ---
**Author:** ![RTFirefly](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/c77e96/32.png) [@RTFirefly](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RTFirefly)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2019, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/77 "2019-06-28T23:17:43Z")
> [@RobDog](#): > > Celine Dion - My Heart Will Go On Seconded. And along similar lines, I’ll add Whitney Houston’s cover of “I Will Always Love You.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2019, 1:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/78 "2019-06-29T01:40:06Z")
I’ve heard the Rolling Stones’s “Satisfaction” enough for ten lifetimes. I always lunge for the next-station button when it comes on. ---
**Author:** ![ZipperJJ](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/zipperjj/32/211_2.png) [@ZipperJJ](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ZipperJJ)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2019, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/79 "2019-06-29T01:57:28Z")
**"Sex on Fire" by Kings of Leon.** And then, everything else by Kings of Leon. ---
**Author:** ![Saintly\_Loser](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/saintly_loser/32/4045_2.png) [@Saintly\_Loser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Saintly_Loser)\ **Post date:** [June 29, 2019, 3:20am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163/80 "2019-06-29T03:20:22Z")
> [@Grestarian](#): > > Are you talking about …well…90% of her catalogue because that’s just her vocal range or are you talking about that disgusting let’s show the world I’m (not) just as good as Olivia Newton-John and remake her “Loving You” and butcher the signature aria? Wasn’t that Minnie Riperton? [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163.md?page=3) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-that-make-you-want-to-stick-pencils-in-your-ears/836163.md?page=5)