# Songs to take oversized mallets to **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Tags:** music\ **Created:** [February 19, 2020, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183 "2020-02-19T17:30:17Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 11\ **Page:** 13
**Author:** ![XOldiesJock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/ec9cab/32.png) [@XOldiesJock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XOldiesJock)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 1:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/241 "2025-07-28T01:09:15Z")
> [@Disinfectus](#): > > _“Billy Don’t Be a Hero”. 1974, Paper Lace._ Paper Lace did record that song, but their version was a hit in England, while on this side of the pond, the hit version was by Bo Donaldson and the Heywoods. Paper Lace recorded the equally despicable “The Night Chicago Died.” I was an AM Top 40 DJ at that time, and I hated both of them passionately. We couldn’t wait until they dropped off the chart and into oblivion, never to be played again. ---
**Author:** ![Disinfectus](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/disinfectus/32/11085_2.png) [@Disinfectus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Disinfectus)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 1:14am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/242 "2025-07-28T01:14:40Z")
Thanks for the clarification. That’s what I get for lazy googling. I knew something sounded wrong about it. But you are also correct that both of those songs are horrific. And I can’t imagine having to play those songs repeatedly. You had a glimpse of hell. ---
**Author:** ![Dung\_Beetle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dung_beetle/32/7945_2.png) [@Dung\_Beetle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dung_Beetle)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 1:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/243 "2025-07-28T01:18:04Z")
> [@XOldiesJock](#): > > never to be played again. You know you’ve jinxed us all, right? Tomorrow when one of them pops up, I shall shake my fist at you! ---
**Author:** ![digs](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/digs/32/14889_2.png) [@digs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/digs)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/244 "2025-07-28T01:28:05Z")
> [@Disinfectus](#): > > And I can’t imagine having to play those songs repeatedly. You had a glimpse of hell. Y’know, that includes those of us who were riding around in cars with only AM radios. Having one “Top40” station in town meant you heard the Top Ten Drivel over and over again… I know my kids just canNOT conceive of that hell. Or understand my relief when FM came along (we could even get WCFL, real rock all the way from Chicago)! And then “progressive” stations started playing album cuts (or even whole albums, maaaan…) ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 1:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/245 "2025-07-28T01:35:13Z")
> [@Disinfectus](#): > > “Billy Don’t Be a Hero”. 1974, Paper Lace. Really bad. > [@Patx2](#): > > I’ve never been a big fan and I never got the love for Hotel California. Yeah. I mean i am not sorry I heard it, but it rates kinda “meh” to me. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 2:35am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/246 "2025-07-28T02:35:52Z")
For me I think it’s the tedious descending chord progressions augmented by the whiney key Henley’s singing in. I guess it’s supposed to be a downer, so bully for them? I give a “Careful: barf” rating. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2025, 3:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/247 "2025-07-28T03:59:06Z")
When I was in college, one of the reporters for the school newspaper said he realized he really was an adult when he heard “The Night Chicago Died” and didn’t think it was that bad of a song. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2025, 1:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/248 "2025-08-09T01:10:15Z")
One of the most appropriately-titled songs, featuring the Most Disgusting Snare Drum Effect, in, Like, Ever: “Drive Me Crazy” by Fine Young Cannibals. At least a fly-swatter. ---
**Author:** ![XOldiesJock](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/x/ec9cab/32.png) [@XOldiesJock](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/XOldiesJock)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2025, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/249 "2025-08-09T12:05:39Z")
Forgive me if I’ve mentioned this before, but it happened again yesterday. It seems like every time I enter BJs Wholesale Club, **MMMBop by Hanson** is playing on the loudspeakers, or will play sometime during the hour or so I’m there. That is one of the most singularly annoying ditties in pop music history. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [August 25, 2025, 1:33am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/250 "2025-08-25T01:33:00Z")
“Oh What a Feeling (What a Rush)” by a band I’d never heard of until I looked up this song - Crowbar. Even the “partying”, and the constipated guitar solo. The Assocation-y “bah-da-da, daaaaaaa” was its only redeeming thing. ---
**Author:** ![Guest-starring\_Id](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guest-starring_id/32/21736_2.png) [@Guest-starring\_Id](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guest-starring_Id)\ **Post date:** [May 13, 2026, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183/251 "2026-05-13T01:57:54Z")
> [@Guest-starring\_Id](#): > > “bah-da-da, daaaaaaa” Should have been more like “bah, ba-da, baaaaaah” “Get it On” - T Rex Can you possibly think of a weaker, almost-non-existent, lightweight, pedestrian-as-all-get-out, wispy, feeble, guitar riff? (the main one, that always directly follows the “get it on” lyric) As far as I’m concerned the song would’ve gotten nowhere if it wasn’t for the quite splendid “hubcap diamond star halo” lyric. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-to-take-oversized-mallets-to/848183.md?page=12)