# Songs where the object of affection is NOT attractive... **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [July 27, 2012, 7:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596 "2012-07-27T19:15:04Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![jayjay](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jayjay/32/6765_2.png) [@jayjay](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jayjay)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 9:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/21 "2012-07-27T21:27:24Z")
> [@RealityChuck](#): > > Nice choice. Probably the most subversive love song ever. With a very effective gut-punch at the end. ---
**Author:** ![cjepson](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/a9adbd/32.png) [@cjepson](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cjepson)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 9:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/22 "2012-07-27T21:32:06Z")
“[She’s Just My Style](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Y9ntCcf9Ewk)” by Gary Lewis & the Playboys? “Other guys who meet her, they don’t think she’s much to see I can’t even tell you what she always does to me” Then there are a variety of songs that appear to be about women who perhaps do not fit the ideal of conventional beauty, such as: Short Fat Fanny Skinny Minnie Boney Moronie Jimmy Murphy’s “[Put Some Meat on Them Bones](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=RufzxJLAKg8)” ---
**Author:** ![Peanuthead](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/peanuthead/32/360_2.png) [@Peanuthead](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Peanuthead)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 9:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/23 "2012-07-27T21:37:20Z")
I once heard a bluegrass tune with the chorus: Always marry an ugly girl. That’s my favorite kind. She’ll never ever leave you but if she does you won’t mind. ---
**Author:** ![Johnny\_Q](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/898d66/32.png) [@Johnny\_Q](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Johnny_Q)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 9:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/24 "2012-07-27T21:46:02Z")
[U Stink But I Love U](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=odUt-lDH85k)– Billy and the Boingers ---
**Author:** ![bup](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/6bbea6/32.png) [@bup](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/bup)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 9:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/25 "2012-07-27T21:59:24Z")
Lyle Lovett - She’s Hot to Go > [@Lyle P Lovett](#): > > Well I could handle it behind her > And I like it on the side > But don’t make me look around her man 'cause she’s > Ugly-ugly-ugly-ugly-ugly > She was ugly from the front… ---
**Author:** ![Suse](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/df705f/32.png) [@Suse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suse)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 10:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/26 "2012-07-27T22:43:38Z")
Stay With Me - Rod Stewart Won’t need too much persuading I don’t mean to sound degrading But with a face like that You got nothing to laugh about ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 11:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/27 "2012-07-27T23:01:43Z")
**Funny Honey** from Chicago, though it’s meant ironically. ---
**Author:** ![billfish678](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/7bcc69/32.png) [@billfish678](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/billfish678)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 11:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/28 "2012-07-27T23:04:46Z")
Lola perhaps? At the very least she walked like a woman and talked like a man which doesn’t sound all that great honestly. ---
**Author:** ![KarlGrenze](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/dbc845/32.png) [@KarlGrenze](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/KarlGrenze)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/29 "2012-07-27T23:29:23Z")
[Crank it up](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JbC72UtNNGY), somewhat… ---
**Author:** ![Blake](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/a9a28c/32.png) [@Blake](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Blake)\ **Post date:** [July 27, 2012, 11:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/30 "2012-07-27T23:31:21Z")
**A Better Place To Be** , Harry Chapin ““I wish that I was beautiful, or you were half way blind. And I wish I wern’t so dog gone fat, and I wish that you were mine.” ---
**Author:** ![RealityChuck](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/realitychuck/32/195_2.png) [@RealityChuck](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RealityChuck)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/31 "2012-07-28T00:06:45Z")
Martin Mull’s “(How Could I Not Miss) A Girl Your Size.” As a bonus, both the singer and his love are obese. ---
**Author:** ![Wesley\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/wesley_clark/32/20581_2.png) [@Wesley\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Wesley_Clark)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 12:32am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/32 "2012-07-28T00:32:16Z")
Mail order Annie - Harry Chapin You know you’re not as pretty as I dreamed you’d be, But then I’m not no handsome fancy Dan. And out here looks are really not important. It’s what’s inside a woman when she’s up against the land. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 1:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/33 "2012-07-28T01:16:54Z")
“Bill” from _Showboat_: And I can’t explain, It’s surely not his brain That makes me thrill - I love him because he’s wonderful, Because he’s just my Bill. Someone (I think it was Barbra Streisand) sang this to President Clinton and when I saw the clip, I thought, “Didn’t anybody think about the lyrics?” ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 2:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/34 "2012-07-28T02:01:18Z")
[A song about a skinny, bald woman.](http://www.metrolyrics.com/long-tall-sally-lyrics-little-richard.html) > [@](#): > > Well, long tall Sally, she’s built for speed > She got everything that Uncle John need > > Oh baby, yes, babyOoh baby, havin’ me some fun tonight, yeah > > Well, I saw Uncle John with bald head Sally > He saw Aunt Mary comin’ and he ducked back in the alley ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/35 "2012-07-28T02:05:27Z")
[BABALU’S WEDDING DAY](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ADAoLp_VxfM) Featuring “husky Babalina” He met his woman at a baseball game Playing second base for the Milwaukee Braves Husky Babalina was her name Asked her for an autograph and made a date Babalu, Babalu, Babalu’s wedding day ---
**Author:** ![Hippy\_Hollow](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hippy_hollow/32/4841_2.png) [@Hippy\_Hollow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hippy_Hollow)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 2:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/36 "2012-07-28T02:10:14Z")
If we broaden the criteria to unconventionally attractive, I’d nominate “Dare To Be Fat” by Rootboy Slim. “That’s okay, I’m portly too.” ---
**Author:** ![dropzone](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dropzone/32/7515_2.png) [@dropzone](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dropzone)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/37 "2012-07-28T02:11:46Z")
Billy Joel “I Love You Just the Way You Are.” \*I don’t want clever conversation I never want to work that hard I just want someone that I can talk to I want you just the way you are. \* Your clothes are crap, your hair is ugly, but at least you’re stupid. (sigh) SO romantic! ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 2:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/38 "2012-07-28T02:36:39Z")
> [@Suse](#): > > Stay With Me - Rod Stewart > Won’t need too much persuading > I don’t mean to sound degrading > But with a face like that > You got nothing to laugh about Rod Stewart also has “Maggie May”: The morning sun when it’s in your face really shows your age But that don’t worry me none in my eyes you’re everything ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/39 "2012-07-28T03:27:33Z")
[Nice Legs, Shame About Her Face](http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X7r5RYThiHM) by The Monks ---
**Author:** ![denquixote](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b9bd4f/32.png) [@denquixote](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/denquixote)\ **Post date:** [July 28, 2012, 4:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596/40 "2012-07-28T04:28:58Z")
“Baldhead” by Professor Longhair (Roy BYrd) “Oh looky there she ain’t got no hair.” [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-where-the-object-of-affection-is-not-attractive/629596.md?page=3)