# Songs which should be banned from bar jukeboxes **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [May 5, 2005, 11:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615 "2005-05-05T23:41:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Jaade](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/dfb087/32.png) [@Jaade](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jaade)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/21 "2005-05-06T15:44:47Z")
> [@melondeca](#): > > **I Love This Bar** by _Toby Keith_ > > I DESPISE this song. This was played more than anything else when I had my previous bartending job. Now I only hear it when someone is brave enough (read-drunk enough) to sing it during karaoke and that is surprisingly seldom. Toby Keith has a deep, full voice. That’s hard to imitate. I think a lot of people know better than to try. ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/22 "2005-05-06T15:45:36Z")
Add to this fine list “Piano Man” by Billy Joel, “American Pie” by Don McLean, “If I Had A Million Dollars” by Barenaked Ladies, “Stairway To Heaven” by Led Zepplin, and anything by Korn or Limp Bizkit. ---
**Author:** ![Sampiro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/2acd7d/32.png) [@Sampiro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sampiro)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/23 "2005-05-06T16:09:49Z")
Any songs that mention _Waffle House_ in the title, opening lines, or copyright. For those not familiar, [Waffle House](http://www.wafflehouse.com/) is a greasy-spoon chain specializing in waffles (duh), hash-browns (scattered covered smothered topped diced lubed combed bludgeoned humiliated etc.) and sandwiches. Each Waffle House has a jukebox, each jukebox has (in addition to country and pop) about forty songs about Waffle House, some with a country slant and some with a rock slant and some with a disco slant, etc. (to my knowledge there are no gansta rap, showtune or operatic Waffle House songs yet). Somewhere along the line it became hip for college age kids to pump quarters into the jukebox and load up the playlist with consecutive Waffle House songs. I think it’s a bravery test as the kids still eat the hashbrowns and omelettes the staff cooks. I’m guessing they’ve ingested enough DNA of Waffle House cooks who’ve heard that “there’s a special lady at the Waffle House song” one too many times to start their own restaurant chain. ---
**Author:** ![Ike\_Witt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ike_witt/32/283_2.png) [@Ike\_Witt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ike_Witt)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/24 "2005-05-06T16:23:07Z")
Stop _Hard to Handle_ by the Black Crowes. Please. ---
**Author:** ![yellowval](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/919ad9/32.png) [@yellowval](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowval)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/25 "2005-05-06T16:34:51Z")
**Puff the Magic Dragon** The bar I frenquent most frequently used to have this song. Seriously. One guy would play it, on average, five times a night. I never, ever want to hear it again. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/26 "2005-05-06T16:43:04Z")
Damn, you guys need to come to the Alley Cat. I don’t believe that any of those songs are on the jukebox. And if someone had the nerve to play something that annoying, Dave would delight in hitting the kill switch. And he won’t refund your money. You just learn a lesson. 😃 But, you should be warned, if you aren’t a fan of good metal, you won’t like it there. ---
**Author:** ![Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/9de053/32.png) [@Jackknifed\_Juggernaut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackknifed_Juggernaut)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/27 "2005-05-06T16:46:07Z")
> [@Cadabra](#): > > “Bad to the bone” by George Thorogood and the Destroyers. Why is it whom ever plays this song must pose by the jukebox like they are such hot stuff. Thanks for not saying: “One Bourbon, One Scotch and One Beer”. I play that one all the time. Of course, I only first heard it about 2 months ago. ---
**Author:** ![guizot](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guizot/32/3636_2.png) [@guizot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/guizot)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/28 "2005-05-06T16:55:05Z")
Can the restaurant/bar specify which songs are on the Jukebox? ---
**Author:** ![Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/6f9a4e/32.png) [@Hey\_It\_s\_That\_Guy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hey_It_s_That_Guy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/29 "2005-05-06T17:04:15Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > Damn, you guys need to come to the Alley Cat. I don’t believe that any of those songs are on the jukebox. And if someone had the nerve to play something that annoying, Dave would delight in hitting the kill switch. And he won’t refund your money. You just learn a lesson. 😃 But, you should be warned, if you aren’t a fan of good metal, you won’t like it there. Um, the only metal band I like is Nightwish… ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Ashtar](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ea924/32.png) [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/30 "2005-05-06T17:04:19Z")
I could die a happy man if I never have to hear _Earl_ by the Dixie Chicks ever again. ---
**Author:** ![Indygrrl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/58f4c7/32.png) [@Indygrrl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Indygrrl)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 5:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/31 "2005-05-06T17:04:51Z")
> [@etmiller](#): > > Can the restaurant/bar specify which songs are on the Jukebox? Yeah, I think they have total control over what goes in it. Places I go to have local music in their jukeboxes, so I know they must own the jukebox or pay someone to maintain it or something. ---
**Author:** ![DaddyTimesTwo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/f07891/32.png) [@DaddyTimesTwo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DaddyTimesTwo)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 5:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/32 "2005-05-06T17:12:02Z")
> [@Indygrrl](#): > > … But, you should be warned, if you aren’t a fan of good metal, you won’t like it there. What’s this “good metal” stuff? 😉 ---
**Author:** ![Hypno-Toad](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/b2d939/32.png) [@Hypno-Toad](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hypno-Toad)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/33 "2005-05-06T18:31:57Z")
“Bad Company” “Boot Scootin’ Boogie” “Achey-Breaky Heart” “Cat Scratch Fever” All of these could disappear from Juke boxes forever and the sun would shine a little brighter, children would laugh a little harder and the flowers would smell a little sweeter. ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/34 "2005-05-06T18:44:57Z")
> [@Big Bad Voodoo Lou](#): > > Add to this fine list “Piano Man” by Billy Joel Gak! This song is Billy Joel’s egomaniacal ode to himself. Whenever I hear it, I imagine him singing “I am so great / I’m the piano man! / I am much better than you…” ---
**Author:** ![Don\_Draper](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Don\_Draper](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Don_Draper)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:50pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/35 "2005-05-06T18:50:03Z")
Shazbot! I hit ‘submit’ before I even typed in my own contribution. Anyway, I’d put “That’s Life” by Frank Sinatra on the list, “Bohemian Rapsody” by Queen and “Kiss Off” by the Violent Femmes on the list. Three songs I used to like, before the dire six months that I worked in a bar… ---
**Author:** ![My\_Dog\_Klaus](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f04885/32.png) [@My\_Dog\_Klaus](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/My_Dog_Klaus)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 6:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/36 "2005-05-06T18:57:45Z")
I’ll second “American Pie”. Back when juke boxes had 45’s instead of cd’s, American Pie was apparently too long to fit on one side, so they split it and put the second half on side 2. It was bad enough hearing the song with a 20 second pause in the middle while it flipped, but some joker would always punch in just side 2. ---
**Author:** ![JohnBckWLD](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/d6d6ee/32.png) [@JohnBckWLD](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnBckWLD)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2005, 9:54pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/37 "2005-05-06T21:54:30Z")
I wouldn’t mind seeing a public health regulation passed that made it illegal to install any of the [Now! That’s What I Call Music](http://www.nowthatsmusic.com/) various artist CD compliations into jukeboxes. That goes double for the Now Christmas 1 & 2 volumes. ---
**Author:** ![pool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/pool/32/4152_2.png) [@pool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pool)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 1:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/38 "2005-05-07T01:53:02Z")
Dear god ban all songs by Nickelback ---
**Author:** ![Superdude](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/superdude/32/13450_2.png) [@Superdude](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Superdude)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/39 "2005-05-07T02:06:28Z")
[Simpsons] Moe: And we’re taking your favorite song outta the jukebox. Homer [panicky]: Not “It’s Raining Men!” [/Simpsons] ---
**Author:** ![August\_West](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/august_west/32/18069_2.png) [@August\_West](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/August_West)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2005, 3:42am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615/40 "2005-05-07T03:42:17Z")
Oh man! As an ex-bartender of nearly 4 years, I can not agree more with Margaritaville. Seriously, I have heard that song at least 6 million times. It still sickens me. I had the biggest chip on my shoulder about Jimmy Buffet just because of that song until some friends showed me some of his other work. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/songs-which-should-be-banned-from-bar-jukeboxes/302615.md?page=3)