# Sorry, I'm STILL NOT GAY, but thanks! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 2, 2002, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042 "2002-12-02T21:43:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 2
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 1:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/21 "2002-12-03T01:56:10Z")
I’m just saying i have been hit on alot, usually by older men. And, no, it is not because i hang out in gay bars or anything, it is usually downtown or on the beach. So you haven’t hit on a straight guy, good for you, i was relating my experiences, you hardly speak for the entire SF gay community like i hardly speak for the entire SF straight community. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Wrong\_Girl](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/b782af/32.png) [@The\_Wrong\_Girl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Wrong_Girl)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/22 "2002-12-03T02:06:55Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by gobear \* > \*\*And yet he had your phone number… > > And so does the [Onion](http://www.theonion.com/onion3604/why_do_all_these.html). \*\* What’s funny about this was that I knew exactly which story that was without even clicking on it. I think that’s true Onion nerd-dom right there. ---
**Author:** ![iampunha](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/74df32/32.png) [@iampunha](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/iampunha)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 2:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/23 "2002-12-03T02:07:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lazymexicanamerican \* > I’m not homophobic… you wanna be a lesbian go ahead just don’t hit on me! What in the world does _wanting_ to be a lesbian have to do with anything? Do you _want_ to be Mexican-American? It isn’t a matter of what you _want_ but what you _are_. ---
**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 2:08am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/24 "2002-12-03T02:08:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by In Conceivable \* > \*\*Are you gay now?? > > Now? > > How about now?\*\* The secret life of the Verizon guy. ---
**Author:** ![dantheman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dantheman/32/9421_2.png) [@dantheman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dantheman)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/25 "2002-12-03T02:09:59Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Medea’s Child \* > \*\*I don’t care if you are male, female, gay, straight, fuck buddy, close friend, or someone I nod to on the street…if you aren’t _in_ my bed at midnight, I don’t want to hear from you about **anything** at midnight. I’ll forgive you later if its a huge emergency and you fall into the “close friend” category. (Note for the impaired: Sex is not an emergency…) \*\* That is _soooooooo_ not fair. Some friend! Anyway, unwelcome sexual advances are bad at any hour. That might be why they’re classified as “unwelcome.” **Biggirl** wondered if **Ace** would have the same reaction if a stubbly fat girl had called him around the same time at night. I reckon that the two main problems are that the person was calling at such a late hour AND barely knew the OP (and had, in fact, had seen him only one time, in a bar a year or so ago). If a stubbly fat girl called him at midnight after meeting him in a bar a year before, my guess is he’d have a similar reaction. But there’s a third problem, and that’s where the gay issue comes into play. The problem isn’t that the caller is gay, it’s that he presumed **Ace** was without asking - in fact, merely on the basis of one conversation in a bar 365 days or so ago. That might bug me a little, too. So maybe it’s a combination of all three. **Ace**? Am I right? ---
**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/26 "2002-12-03T02:11:22Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by iampunha \* > \*\*What in the world does _wanting_ to be a lesbian have to do with anything? Do you _want_ to be Mexican-American? It isn’t a matter of what you _want_ but what you _are_. \*\* Whoa whoa whoa…I could be wrong, but I dunno that she necessarily meant it _that_ way… ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 3:17am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/27 "2002-12-03T03:17:45Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tars Tarkas \* > \*\*I’m just saying i have been hit on alot, usually by older men. And, no, it is not because i hang out in gay bars or anything, it is usually downtown or on the beach. So you haven’t hit on a straight guy, good for you, i was relating my experiences, you hardly speak for the entire SF gay community like i hardly speak for the entire SF straight community. \*\* I’m not doubting that you have been hit on. You’re probably a hot guy. And I was just speaking for me. But you are the one who said you are like crack to 40 year old gay guys. And I thought that was just a little too broad a statement. A lot of straight women have hit on me over the years, but I don’t think I’m like crack, or I could suck all of them dry – money wise, though. My point is, keep taking it as a compliment, but don’t assume ALL of us over 40 gay guys want young straight guys. And thanks\*\* **gobear** \*\*. I’m glad someone else understands this. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 3:18am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/28 "2002-12-03T03:18:47Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Biggirl \* > \*\*I wonder what Ace’s reaction would have been if the caller had been a girl. I wonder what his reaction would have been if it was a big, fat girl with chin bristle. > I wonder if Ace’s disgust would have been more understandable or less understandable under those other circumstances. \*\* And I wonder what the Board’s reaction would be if one of our lesbian members came here to rant about a male acquaintance who was aware of her sexual orientation calling her late one night offering sex. ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 3:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/29 "2002-12-03T03:27:10Z")
I thought **Tars** was being funny. Well, if said lesbian member started ranting about how all straight men want to convert her, or blah blah blah, and how they should blah blah blah…yeah. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 3:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/30 "2002-12-03T03:37:54Z")
Well, **Guin** , I thought **Ace** was being funny. And not to be a wiseass, but > [@](#): > > Well, if said lesbian member started ranting about how all straight men want to convert her, or blah blah blah, and how they should blah blah blah…yeah. Huh? If (A), then… yeah. What does that mean? 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Guinastasia](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/guinastasia/32/5751_2.png) [@Guinastasia](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Guinastasia)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 3:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/31 "2002-12-03T03:55:06Z")
Nothing, really. Oh hell, I guess I mean I’d feel the same way if the orientations and gender were reversed. ---
**Author:** ![minty\_green](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f6c823/32.png) [@minty\_green](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/minty_green)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/32 "2002-12-03T04:01:17Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Tars Tarkas \* > I’m just saying i have been hit on alot, usually by older men. And, no, it is not because i hang out in gay bars or anything, it is usually downtown or on the beach. So you haven’t hit on a straight guy, good for you, i was relating my experiences, you hardly speak for the entire SF gay community like i hardly speak for the entire SF straight community. Hey **Tars** , didn’t you used to be, like, literate? What’s the story here, man? ---
**Author:** ![lazymexicanamerican](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/ecb155/32.png) [@lazymexicanamerican](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/lazymexicanamerican)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/33 "2002-12-03T04:09:53Z")
Yes iampunha! i do want to be a mexican american! What kind of dumb question is that? Im not i just wish to be. B/c i speak spanish and i have mexican friends and i have been soulfully adopted into their mexican sisterhood. Beat that! And wanting and being are ur opinions. There aren’t complete facts that ur born homosexual. Their looking into that! ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/34 "2002-12-03T04:10:50Z")
Posted by **kevja** : "As I’ve said so many times. I’ve been here for nearly 30 years, And I’ve never hit on a straight guy. Even the straight guys who like to hang around in gay bars every week, then get pissed if a gay guy hits on them. And what is up with that bullshit. " (Underlining mine) Dumb-ass straight guy checking in here: Why would straight guys hang out in gay bars? Are you sure they’re really straight? I like to go to bars where there are girls to play with. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/35 "2002-12-03T04:15:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by John Carter of Mars \* > \*\*Posted by **kevja** : "As I’ve said so many times. I’ve been here for nearly 30 years, And I’ve never hit on a straight guy. Even the straight guys who like to hang around in gay bars every week, then get pissed if a gay guy hits on them. And what is up with that bullshit. " (Underlining mine) > > Dumb-ass straight guy checking in here: Why would straight guys hang out in gay bars? Are you sure they’re really straight? I like to go to bars where there are girls to play with. 😕 \*\* Lemme take a crack at this. Because they have gay guy friends. Because gay bars are fun. Because he’s hanging out with his wild-assed wife. Because he’s hanging out with is brother Lola. Because that bar has the cheapest beer. Because. . . ---
**Author:** ![astro](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/9dc877/32.png) [@astro](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/astro)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/36 "2002-12-03T04:27:13Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lazymexicanamerican \* > \*\*Yes iampunha! i do want to be a mexican american! What kind of dumb question is that? Im not i just wish to be. B/c i speak spanish and i have mexican friends and i have been soulfully adopted into their mexican sisterhood. Beat that! And wanting and being are ur opinions. There aren’t complete facts that ur born homosexual. Their looking into that! \*\* Caps key busted? I’ve extras if you need one! ---
**Author:** ![John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/2bfe46/32.png) [@John\_Carter\_of\_Mars](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_Carter_of_Mars)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:36am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/37 "2002-12-03T04:36:36Z")
Posted by **Biggirl** : "Lemme take a crack at this. Because they have gay guy friends. Because gay bars are fun. Because he’s hanging out with his wild-assed wife. Because he’s hanging out with is brother Lola. Because that bar has the cheapest beer. Because. . ." **Biggirl** : For these reasons they would hang out in a gay bar every week like kevja says they do? For me, those reasons wouldn’t over-ride having a chance to meet someone to dance with. Obviously, YMMV. ---
**Author:** ![apotheosis](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ba8739/32.png) [@apotheosis](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/apotheosis)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/38 "2002-12-03T04:41:54Z")
**iampunha** : nevermind. ---
**Author:** ![carrot](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/9de0a6/32.png) [@carrot](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carrot)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/39 "2002-12-03T04:43:39Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lazymexicanamerican \* > Yes iampunha! i do want to be a mexican american! What kind of dumb question is that? Well, I think it was a rhetorical question, to be specific. > [@](#): > > Im not i just wish to be. B/c i speak spanish and i have mexican friends and i have been soulfully adopted into their mexican sisterhood. Beat that! You go, girl! > [@](#): > > And wanting and being are ur opinions. There aren’t complete facts that ur born homosexual. Their looking into that! [Walter Cronkite]As we speak, top government scientists are examing the origins of homosexuality. President Richard Nixon projects that the ‘homo mystery’ will be solved by 1976…[/Walter Cronkite] I also would like to say that I see a strange kind of symmetry that **lazymexicanamerican** can’t quite summon the energy to type ‘yo’. ---
**Author:** ![Biggirl](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/biggirl/32/3294_2.png) [@Biggirl](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Biggirl)\ **Post date:** [December 3, 2002, 4:44am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/40 "2002-12-03T04:44:28Z")
Well, I don’t know why a guy who hangs out in gay bars would get pissed if he got hit on-- that just sounds like somebody looking for a fight. I was answering “why would a straight guy go to a gay bar” part and not so much the “every week and get pissed off” part. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042.md?page=1) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042.md?page=3)