# Sorry, I'm STILL NOT GAY, but thanks! **URL:** \ **Category:** The BBQ Pit\ **Created:** [December 2, 2002, 9:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042 "2002-12-02T21:43:10Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 6
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/101 "2002-12-04T16:30:44Z")
Despite my teasing Onion reference, I don’t think the OP necessarily reflects a hatred of homosexuals _per se_, but more a quesiness produced by some guy he met once a year ago calling him up at an ungodly hour for a booty call. I don’t think we should let our dislike of **Ace** blind us to the basic justice of his complaint–he is entitled to feel icky when solicited to do things with men. We all have had experiences that made us queasy, like a guy whacking off near one person on the Chicago El, or when a fat, ugly, drunken old creep comes up to me in a bar and says, “You’re purty, wanna go home and fuck?” IMO, **Ace** is entitled to his feelings about being solicited in a particularly creepy manner by someone who skeeved him out, and I do not think that this incident **on its own** reflects a generalized homophobia on his part. If ace had opned a thread with the title, “All gay men are creeoy”? or"Gay people disgust me," then he justly could be flamed to a crisp. But c’mon, why should a straight guy not be allowed to feel a certain discomfort at the idea of sticking a roick hard willy in his mouth? I know that the idea of me licking a woman’s hairy you-know-what gives me the heebie jeebies–does that make me a misogynist? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 4:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/102 "2002-12-04T16:33:38Z")
Thanks **Gobear** , well said and quite … unexpected. (Checks calendar.) Also, I don’t know if you read Dan Savage’s Savage Love, though I expect many of you do. He regularly talks about how much the nappy dugout skeeves him out, and you know what? To each their own. ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/103 "2002-12-04T16:55:25Z")
**Ace** , we have an extremely rocky history, but that doesn 't mean that you should not be defended when you are being unfairly maligned. People around here have this idea that I’m some monomaniacal radical ready to cry “Homophobe!” at the slightest provocation. Yeah, sure, when I see an antigay comment, I’ll be among the first to do the old Kzinti roar and pounce with fangs bared and claws unsheathed. If I think someone is being sly about using coded agendas that other people don’t pick up, I’ll say so. If I think I’m right, God himself can’t move me. But I strongly believe that personal dislike should not sway me from stepping up to defend someone if I think they are being ganged on unfairly. Justice is for everyone, not just the likable. To quote one of my faovite movies: > [@](#): > > Or it could be you’re the righteous man and I’m the shepherd and it’s the world that’s evil and selfish. I’d like that. But that shit ain’t the truth. The truth is you’re the weak. And I’m the tyranny of evil men. But I’m tryin’, Ringo. I’m tryin’ real hard to be a shepherd. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/104 "2002-12-04T16:59:45Z")
Once again, I think Ace’s history led to the flaming, not the OP alone. A cite you ask? I don’t have the time nor inclination to go through his entire posting history, but you can start [here](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=127683&pagenumber=2) Moreover, his bigotry is evidenced by his continual defense of bigots whenever possible, numerous times with Joe\_Cool, His4Ever and even 'Ugli. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 5:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/105 "2002-12-04T17:06:01Z")
Well, how nice, **Gobear**. I think I’ll go out and see if someone needs a mitzvah. * * * Well, it’s not going to be **Homebrew** : Defending alleged bigots makes me a bigot? How about the ACLU? Full of racists, thieves, and bigots? Defense lawyers? That’s an “idiotic” statement by you. Now you’ve just called **Gobear** a bigot, something he manifestly is not. Take yourself, your opinions, that boulder on your shoulder, and go soak your head. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 5:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/106 "2002-12-04T17:53:12Z")
Now I’m inclined to do a bit more searching. Acehole on [Gays and Adoption](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=119664). Ace on [Gays in general](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2183633#post2183633) Ace on [Lisps](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2163813#post2163813) Ace just being an [ass](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&postid=2201228#post2201228) Need more? ---
**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/107 "2002-12-04T18:16:50Z")
_laugh_ How about something with relevance, chucklehead? Maybe even something that just doesn’t make it obvious how big an axe you have to grind. What about that thread where I demolished you? Didn’t want anyone to see that embarrassment at the hands of an “idiot?” Ah, good times. Hey, are you still calling **Gobear** a bigot, or what? You _cough_ didn’t address that… ---
**Author:** ![gobear](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/8dc957/32.png) [@gobear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/gobear)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/108 "2002-12-04T18:31:59Z")
> [@](#): > > Hey, are you still calling Gobear a bigot, or what? You _cough_ didn’t address that… **Homebrew** intended no such implication and it’s wrong for you to use me as a foil in your fight. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/109 "2002-12-04T18:38:02Z")
Of course he didn’t intend it. He implied that defending alleged bigots is the same as being a bigot, which was the stupid post of the day. It just so happens that you’d just defended me, an alleged bigot, a post earlier, so the cognitive dissonance was rather jarring. Homebrew: Defending alleged bigots does _not_ make you a bigot, that’s incredibly monstrously gigantically STUPID. Please go _soak_ your head, and we’ll both leave **Gobear** out of this. ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/110 "2002-12-04T18:53:43Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by kevja \* > \*\* > My point is, keep taking it as a compliment, but don’t assume ALL of us over 40 gay guys want young straight guys. \*\* I don’t see where he did this. What I saw was that he has experienced a number of older gay men hitting on him, and found an amusing way to say it. Most of us got it. Some people tried to read too much into it. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:58pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/111 "2002-12-04T18:58:09Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lazymexicanamerican \* > \*\* > As for you John Carter… PLEASE go back to Mars. I really don’t care if you read my posts or not. \*\* Calot! to attack John carter is to attack me! especially when he did nothing wrong! ::Draws his Barsoomian longsword:: ---
**Author:** ![OpalCat](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/o/8edcca/32.png) [@OpalCat](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/OpalCat)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/112 "2002-12-04T18:59:08Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by lazymexicanamerican \* > \*\*Yes iampunha! i do want to be a mexican american! What kind of dumb question is that? Im not i just wish to be. B/c i speak spanish and i have mexican friends and i have been soulfully adopted into their mexican sisterhood. Beat that! And wanting and being are ur opinions. There aren’t complete facts that ur born homosexual. Their looking into that! \*\* I saw the word “spanish” and so I used that as a clue to understanding this post. I used Babelfish to translate to spanish and back… but that apparently wasn’t the secret, as all I got was: \*to be a Mexican American! class of dumb question is?sa? Im not that as soon as desire to be. B/c i speaks espa?ol and I have Mexican friends and soulfully has adopted to me in their Mexican brotherhood. that! And desire and the being are opinions of ur. There are no the facts complete that homosexual taken ur.?El his to watch in that! \* Which doesn’t make any more sense than the original ☹ ---
**Author:** ![elfkin477](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/a9a28c/32.png) [@elfkin477](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/elfkin477)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/113 "2002-12-04T19:07:04Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by grendel72 \* > \*\*C’mon people… > Maybe some posters overreacted, but when someone uses the phrase “skeevy pipe-smoker” I don’t think it’s out of line to think they may be a homophobe. \*\* I suppose I’m at a disadvantage in regards to keeping up with gay slang and insults since my gay friends are mostly women, but is “pipe-smoker” really a slur against gay men? I suppose that it could relate to oral sex, but I interpreted it as him insinuating that the caller was a druggie (using a “tobacco” pipe for it’s non-legal use), and therefore must have been stoned to think he’d be interested in a midnight booty call. ---
**Author:** ![cuauhtemoc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/ecb155/32.png) [@cuauhtemoc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/cuauhtemoc)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/114 "2002-12-04T19:12:19Z")
I pictured the dude with a corncob pipe hangin out of his mouth, patches on his elbows, maybe a monocle… ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/115 "2002-12-04T19:21:35Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Ace of Swords \* > **What about that thread where I demolished you? Didn’t want anyone to see that embarrassment at the hands of an “idiot?” Ah, good times.** Doesn’t exist. Never happened. And never will. No, **gobear** defending someone against what he believes as an unfair charge is not bigotry. You, however, repeatedly defend the bigoted statements and arguements made by bigots. That makes you a bigot. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/e495f1/32.png) [@The\_Ace\_of\_Swords](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Ace_of_Swords)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/116 "2002-12-04T19:41:02Z")
Oh, you have conclusive proof the the J\_D and J\_C are bigoted? Bullshit. We just had a thread, I’m sure you’ll remember, where you accused them of condemning individuals, I made you a bet you couldn’t find any proof, and you ran from my challenge like a [scared chicken.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=146632&pagenumber=3) Ooh, a cite that’s relevant? Imagine that. I’m just so upset that Homebrew called me a bigot – if only he had any credibility, that would be meaningful. Pah, I can’t be bothered. ---
**Author:** ![Homebrew](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/c89c15/32.png) [@Homebrew](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Homebrew)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/117 "2002-12-04T19:52:10Z")
If that is all it takes for you to consider yourself as having “demolished” someone, then you really are a lost cause. Your cite speaks to your own irrelevancy and stupidity. ---
**Author:** ![Polycarp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/82dd89/32.png) [@Polycarp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Polycarp)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/118 "2002-12-04T19:59:40Z")
> [@](#): > > Calot! to attack John carter is to attack me! especially when he did nothing wrong! :: :Draws his Barsoomian longsword:: I thoat you’d come to his defense – but be restrained in your invective in that kindly deed, or you may be banthed! 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Mockingbird](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c68b51/32.png) [@Mockingbird](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mockingbird)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 8:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/119 "2002-12-04T20:13:02Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by The Ace of Swords \* > \*\*Oh, you have conclusive proof the the J\_D and J\_C are bigoted? Bullshit. We just had a thread, I’m sure you’ll remember, where you accused them of condemning individuals, I made you a bet you couldn’t find any proof, and you ran from my challenge like a [scared chicken.](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?s=&threadid=146632&pagenumber=3) Ooh, a cite that’s relevant? Imagine that. > > I’m just so upset that Homebrew called me a bigot – if only he had any credibility, that would be meaningful. Pah, I can’t be bothered. \*\* And you do have credibility? Suuuuuuuuuuure you do. Regarding Jersey and JC being bigots, you only have to do a search on any thread they entered about homosexuality. ---
**Author:** ![Tars\_Tarkas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/6a8cbe/32.png) [@Tars\_Tarkas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tars_Tarkas)\ **Post date:** [December 4, 2002, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042/120 "2002-12-04T20:15:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Polycarp \* > \*\*I thoat you’d come to his defense – but be restrained in your invective in that kindly deed, or you may be banthed! 😃 \*\* Puns so bad i’ll have to take the pilgrimage down the River Iss to escape! 😃 [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042.md?page=5) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sorry-im-still-not-gay-but-thanks/140042.md?page=7)