# Spam e-mail I haven't seen before **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 20, 2022, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841 "2022-02-20T21:01:14Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2022, 9:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/1 "2022-02-20T21:01:14Z")
…though it’s likely to be a variation of the advance fee scam or an attempt to access a bank account. > ROMAN CATHOLIC ARCHDIOCESE > OF LOS ANGELES CALIFORNIA USA > > I am Rev Joseph Justine the Financial Controller of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Los Angeles California USA > > Are you facing any financial challenges in this period that the world is battling a pandemic and unable to Obtain a loan because of your bad credit status? Do not worry about it. > We give out loans ( Business loan, Personal Loan, etc.).We can help you get out of your financial struggle to overcome financial stress, your bad credit will not be a problem. > > Email us for details > Stay Blessed > Rev Joseph Justine Came from a gmail account that doesn’t come close to matching the name of alleged sender. Just for the hell of it , \< snerk \> I checked the archdiocese’s website and lo and behold, there’s no Rev Joseph Justine listed. In fact, the financial department appears to have a secular staff. Tempting to mess with 'em. ---
**Author:** ![carnut](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/carnut/32/3531_2.png) [@carnut](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/carnut)\ **Post date:** [February 20, 2022, 10:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/2 "2022-02-20T22:14:58Z")
Joseph Justine seems an odd name for a Catholic priest. The Church has it’s own money issues anyway… ---
**Author:** ![Monty](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/monty/32/47_2.png) [@Monty](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Monty)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 12:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/3 "2022-02-21T00:59:34Z")
> [@](#): > > Rev Joseph Justine the Financial Controller of the Roman Catholic Archdiocese of Los Angeles California USA That’s a heck of a name.\* I do like the idea of a preacher called “Father USA”. Reminds me of _Helen America_ in Cordwainer Smith’s _The Lady Who Sailed the Soul_. \*Yes, i’m mocking the author of the spam for their lack of punctuation. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 11:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/4 "2022-02-21T11:54:03Z")
So I sent a reply of nothing but “I’m interested. Details, please.” and got this. > ROMAN CATHOLIC ARCHDIOCESE > OF LOS ANGELES CALIFORNIA USA > 3424 Wilshire Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90010, United States > Tel: 001 213 493 6893 > > Attention : > > We acknowledge the receipt of your mail, you are hereby informed that you have reached the right place to get this loan, as a matter of fact your loan Application to the ROMAN CATHOLIC ARCHDIOCESE OF LOS ANGELES CALIFORNIA USA , will be given immediate attention as your information will be forwarded to different departments who are in charge of the loan processing ,your loan will take up to 3 to 4 days to be processed depending on your cooperation in this transaction. > > Below are the loan terms and conditions. We are willing to help if only you are a genuine borrower. > > ``` > Qualifications: > > ``` > > 1)The Borrower must be at least 18 years old > > 2)Even with Bad credit, we still Guarantee the Borrower the Loan > > 3)The Loan Can Be Granted Even With No Collateral Present or available(Unsecured) > > 4)There is no prepayment penalty. > > 5)You do not need a Co-Signer > > 1. Minimum value of Personal Loan to apply for : USD $ 50,000.00 { FIFTY THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS} > > 2. Maximum value of Personal loan to apply for : USD $ 50,000,000.00 { FIFTY MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS} > > 3. Minimum value of Business / Company Loan to apply for : USD $ 55,000.00 { FIFTY-FIVE THOUSAND UNITED STATES DOLLARS} > > 4. Maximum value of Business / Company Loan to apply for : USD $ 500,000,000.00 { FIVE HUNDRED MILLION UNITED STATES DOLLARS} > > 5. An agreement signing process must be carried out on this transaction by the ROMAN CATHOLIC ARCHDIOCESE . > The borrower must be willing to pay back and also sign all documents concerning the loan agreement. The borrower must be capable of re-paying back. > > Repayment is made Monthly or Yearly depending on the choice of the borrower and The Repayment schedule for a Loan is calculated and sent to the borrower. > > ``` > Interest Rate: > > ``` > > The Interest rate applicable to all Loans Is Two percent (2%) per annum > > ``` > Loan Transfer: > > ``` > > The Loan Is Transferred to the Borrower via > 1)Account swift transfer > 2)Courier delivery service/Cheque > > All depending on your Choice. If you agree to this, do fill out the loan registration /application form attached in this mail and send it back together with a scan copy of your international passport and driver’s license, Voter’s card > > If you are ready to follow the procedure print out the attached form fill it properly and send back to us with scan copy of your International Passport and Driver’s license, Voter’s card > > Stay Blessed > > Reverend Father Joseph Justine > Financial Controller/ Processing > > 3424 Wilshire Blvd, Los Angeles, CA 90010, United States > (Phone redacted, it went to a deceased person) PDF form attached with several spelling and grammar errors. (opened in preview) I’m going to claim my anti-virus won’t let me download it and can they send the form as text in the email body. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 12:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/5 "2022-02-21T12:39:09Z")
There will of course be a fee for arrangement of the ‘loan’ BTW, I don’t recommend replying to scam emails from your regular mailbox. Scambaiting can be fun, but it’s best done from a completely separate and disposable mailbox - because when you reply, the scammer will very often add your address to a list for sale to other scammers. Edit: And of course, never send them scans of documents or any real world information about yourself. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 12:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/6 "2022-02-21T12:44:21Z")
Oh, I know. This is actually the first time I’ve ever replied to one of these. For some reason, I get _very_ little spam. Sometimes weeks between. Same with calls and those I _always_ answer, still only get 2-5 calls a month. ---
**Author:** ![solost](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/solost/32/11776_2.png) [@solost](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/solost)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 1:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/7 "2022-02-21T13:03:22Z")
Maximum business loan to apply for-- half a BILLION dollars? That sounds realistic. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 1:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/8 "2022-02-21T13:08:46Z")
Haven’t you heard? The Catholic Church is _RICH!!!_ That reply I got came in at 9:14pm PST. Pretty late for someone to be in the Archdiocese office answering emails. ---
**Author:** ![Euphonious\_Polemic](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/euphonious_polemic/32/3002_2.png) [@Euphonious\_Polemic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Euphonious_Polemic)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 4:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/9 "2022-02-21T16:53:41Z")
Never trust an email promising you riches if it does not contain: > “It is risk-free, as all modalities have been put in place for a smooth and successful conclusion.” or > "Thus, I crave your distinguished indulgence and honest cooperation to guarantee that this mutual transaction will be executed under a legitimate agreement that will benefit you and lend credence to my humble belief in your honesty and trustworthiness. This shows you are dealing with an upstanding, ethical person. ---
**Author:** ![Mangetout](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/mangetout/32/19_2.png) [@Mangetout](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Mangetout)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/10 "2022-02-21T19:29:24Z")
There’s a certain repertoire of psychological tricks that these scammers seem to employ - promising unimaginable wealth is one of them. I suppose for a certain proportion of potential victims, it must press one of the excitement buttons that helps to suspend critical thinking and rationality. ---
**Author:** ![TheCuse](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thecuse/32/2854_2.png) [@TheCuse](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheCuse)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 7:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/11 "2022-02-21T19:41:47Z")
The scammers many times seem to use a red seal/stamp—which I suppose makes it all official and stuff. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 7:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/12 "2022-02-21T19:47:58Z")
> [@running\_coach (quoting the spam email)](#): > > and unable to Obtain a loan because of your bad credit status? Some of you are _far_ more cynical than you are worldly. Everybody knows that a capital “O” in ‘Obtain’ is a digital signature that ensures the legitimacy of the offer: Lucky dog. Enjoy your newfound, low-cost wealth ! ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 21, 2022, 7:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/13 "2022-02-21T19:57:36Z")
They sent a “form” for me to fill out. This is what they got back. The address and phone number are fake. > NAME: Me > > CONTACT ADDRESS: 650 Meadow Dr Loris, SC 29569 > > NATIONALITY: Murican > > COUNTRY: Murica > > DATE OF BIRTH: February 21, 1960 > > PLACE OF BIRTH: Myrtle Beach, SC > > GENDER: It’s …complicated. > > MARITAL STATUS: Nope, Nada > > CURRENT POSITION HELD AT PLACE OF WORK: Permantently in barrel > > YOUR COMPANY NAME: Nunya > > ZIP CODE: 29569 > > COUNTRY CODE: 1 > > FAX: Who the fuck uses a FAX these days? > > TEL: 843-576-0339 > > AMOUNT REQUIRED AS LOAN IN WORD, IN US DOLLARS $: Fity tousand > > AMOUNT REQUIRED AS LOAN IN FIGURE, IN US DOLLARS $: 50,000 > > PROPOSED TERM/DURATION OF LOAN: Until you find me > > PURPOSE OF LOAN: Hiding out > > MONTHLY INCOME: if I had a monthly income, I wouldn’t need a loan. > > NEXT OF KIN DETAILS > > NEXT OF KIN: No fucking way > > ADDRESS OF NEXT OF KIN: See above > > FAX: Again with the outmoded means of communication > > TEL: Again, no fucking way > > DO YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS? YES NO Not only no but hell no. > > IF YES GIVE BRIEF DESCRIPTION/DETAILS BELOW: ……………………………………………………………………………… > > I HEREBY DECLARE THAT THE INFORMATION GIVEN ABOVE IS TRUE. > Sure enough is. Except where it isn’t. ---
**Author:** ![Spiderman](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spiderman/32/230_2.png) [@Spiderman](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spiderman)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2022, 2:53am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/14 "2022-02-23T02:53:10Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > DO YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS? YES NO Not only no but hell no. I hate to tell you this but you will not be getting the loan since you didn’t fill out the form properly. It’s a loan from the church, doncha’kno DO YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS? YES NO Not only no but **Heaven** no. ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 23, 2022, 2:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/15 "2022-02-23T02:55:26Z")
> [@Spiderman](#): > > > [@running\_coach](#): > > > > DO YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS? YES NO Not only no but hell no. > > I hate to tell you this but you will not be getting the loan since you didn’t fill out the form properly. It’s a loan from the church, doncha’kno - > > DO YOU HAVE ANY ASSETS? YES NO Not only no but **Heaven** no. I think they’re still trying to find Murica on the map. ---
**Author:** ![tofor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/tofor/32/13727_2.png) [@tofor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tofor)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2022, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/16 "2022-02-25T14:07:56Z")
> [@running\_coach](#): > > They sent a “form” for me to fill out. “You know, the sort of information you should _never_ give to a stranger on the internet” ---
**Author:** ![running\_coach](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/running_coach/32/15836_2.png) [@running\_coach](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/running_coach)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2022, 2:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/17 "2022-02-25T14:13:57Z")
> [@tofor](#): > > > [@running\_coach](#): > > > > They sent a “form” for me to fill out. > > “You know, the sort of information you should _never_ give to a stranger on the internet” - You should have seen the PDF, it was _way_ more invasive. And weird. The required IDs were scanned copies of passport, driver’s license and **voter ID card**. ---
**Author:** ![Jackmannii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/jackmannii/32/311_2.png) [@Jackmannii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Jackmannii)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2022, 3:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/18 "2022-02-25T15:55:58Z")
You had better keep up with the payments on Catholic Church loans, unless you want sinister, heavy-set robed figures ringing your doorbell after dark. ---
**Author:** ![DavidNRockies](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/davidnrockies/32/6279_2.png) [@DavidNRockies](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DavidNRockies)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2022, 4:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/19 "2022-02-25T16:01:54Z")
I’m guessing you’re referring to Porchious Pirate. I’d say you cross that bridge when you come to it. ---
**Author:** ![xizor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/xizor/32/102_2.png) [@xizor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/xizor)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2022, 5:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841/20 "2022-02-25T17:42:39Z")
I hope they don’t send… The Penguin [https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7Iq7kzRNE6I/YC0e34LAweI/AAAAAAACnAc/oc3MP2FVLA0RvXtejW-A86rnN-EW844hwCNcBGAsYHQ/w1200-h630-p-k-no-nu/Blues-Brothers-Kathleen-Freeman-1980.JPG](https://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7Iq7kzRNE6I/YC0e34LAweI/AAAAAAACnAc/oc3MP2FVLA0RvXtejW-A86rnN-EW844hwCNcBGAsYHQ/w1200-h630-p-k-no-nu/Blues-Brothers-Kathleen-Freeman-1980.JPG) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spam-e-mail-i-havent-seen-before/959841.md?page=2)