# Speak to me in...TV quotes! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [November 17, 2022, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107 "2022-11-17T22:21:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 120
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 8, 2025, 6:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2381 "2025-05-08T18:24:44Z")
You are not a martyr! You’re just a self-centered little creep who wants to get his face in the paper. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2025, 3:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2382 "2025-05-09T03:45:50Z")
Hey, buddy, I’m going to be in People magazine. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2025, 12:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2383 "2025-05-09T12:05:10Z")
You know what this means? I’m starting the book tour. First stop: Regis and Kathy Lee. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 9, 2025, 6:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2384 "2025-05-09T18:35:39Z")
Looks like he’s coming to give his son a tour of CalTech. He’s hoping you guys can meet up. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 10, 2025, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2385 "2025-05-10T22:01:38Z")
It’s a real thrill, knowing your son’s going to the same college you did! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 12:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2386 "2025-05-12T00:21:57Z")
I don’t want to go to college. I want to be a regular person. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2387 "2025-05-12T05:27:20Z")
Your movements are so lifelike, sometimes I forget you’re not a real boy. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 1:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2388 "2025-05-12T13:39:41Z")
“Strong. Someday he’ll be a real boy.” ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 8:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2389 "2025-05-12T20:09:10Z")
- I’m just a boy! - You’re handling me as if I’m resisting! ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 8:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2390 "2025-05-12T20:21:43Z")
Knock next time, you know? I mean, I’m sitting in here, I’m 14! I got a computer in here, you know! You know you’re really playing with fire when you burst in here like that, man. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 12, 2025, 8:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2391 "2025-05-12T20:29:53Z")
Trust me. He goes in that room cause it’s the only one with a lock on it, and he’s in there for like an hour at a time; which either means he’s really, really good at it…or really, really bad at it. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 14, 2025, 11:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2392 "2025-05-14T23:17:27Z")
You were lying about breaking and entering, otherwise you would’ve helped Charlie with that lock right there. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2025, 3:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2393 "2025-05-17T15:57:47Z")
“There’s no lock?” “For my brothers? They just got their door back a few months ago.” ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2025, 4:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2394 "2025-05-17T16:37:42Z")
(knock-knock-knock) Penny! (knock-knock-knock) Penny! (knock-knock-knock) Penny! ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 17, 2025, 6:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2395 "2025-05-17T18:09:52Z")
- Did you say Penny was moving away? - Yeah, it’s on account of her father’s job. My dad says he either got promoted or fired. - ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 18, 2025, 3:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2396 "2025-05-18T03:22:27Z")
And now to see Mr. Burns about the promotion and raise I’ve deserved since this morning. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2025, 8:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2397 "2025-05-19T20:15:17Z")
It’s a great day. Drew’s got a new job, Kate got a promotion, and the manager at Drug-Co is paying me off so I won’t talk about their new experiment. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2025, 9:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2398 "2025-05-19T21:41:37Z")
As for me, I was fine with my new lot in life. Because I knew the payoff would always outweigh the cost. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 19, 2025, 10:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2399 "2025-05-19T22:31:30Z")
I’ve just been appointed the new safety inspector at this very plant. And a big, fat raise! ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 20, 2025, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/2400 "2025-05-20T19:10:21Z")
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