# Speak to me in...TV quotes! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [November 17, 2022, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107 "2022-11-17T22:21:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 153
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2026, 1:41pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3041 "2026-03-19T13:41:49Z")
Why is your doll coming after me? ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2026, 4:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3042 "2026-03-19T16:03:39Z")
My brother is totally insane! He’s talking to a doll! ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [March 19, 2026, 4:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3043 "2026-03-19T16:30:10Z")
My name is Talky Tina, and you’d better be nice to me. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2026, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3044 "2026-03-20T02:09:26Z")
It’s Howdy Doody time! ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2026, 5:27am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3045 "2026-03-20T05:27:16Z")
Now it’s time to say good-bye to all our company. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 20, 2026, 6:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3046 "2026-03-20T18:52:46Z")
Every theft is like the first time. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2026, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3047 "2026-03-21T15:48:25Z")
It Takes A Thief ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2026, 4:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3048 "2026-03-21T16:05:47Z")
(_A thief flees with Sheldon’s luggage_) Excuse me! Excuse me! ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [March 21, 2026, 4:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3049 "2026-03-21T16:29:48Z")
Uh… Okay. Excuse me! You with the yellow scarf! You may not realize we’re back here, but we’ve been waiting, too! Cutting is stealing! You’re stealing our place in line, you’re stealing our tickets, you’re stealing our time! Oh, please. Don’t act like you can’t hear me. [When the two women turn to face each other, they ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2026, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3050 "2026-03-22T13:51:48Z")
Well, Ben…. I hate to be the one to tell you this, but Joe was caught _stealing_ this here knife from the mercantile. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2026, 2:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3051 "2026-03-22T14:31:27Z")
Excuse me, but have the police caught you? Because you’ve stolen my heart. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [March 22, 2026, 3:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3052 "2026-03-22T15:42:22Z")
So you’re an expert on sex crimes - is that correct? ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2026, 10:54am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3053 "2026-03-23T10:54:45Z")
I was a professional twice over - an analyst and a therapist. The world’s first analrapist. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2026, 1:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3054 "2026-03-23T13:57:20Z")
Oh, I see. Well, nothing is more sacrosanct than our professional ethics. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2026, 5:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3055 "2026-03-23T17:10:40Z")
How can a Rabbi have such a big mouth? ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [March 23, 2026, 9:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3056 "2026-03-23T21:42:04Z")
We all have these kinds of feeling from time to time. You know, there was a man on our church council a few years ago. A decent enough fellow but a bit abrasive. Oblivious to anyone else’s feelings. I wanted to get him out of my hair. I used to fantasize about him converting to Judaism. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2026, 11:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3057 "2026-03-24T11:16:08Z")
I have a suspicion that he’s converted to Judaism just for the jokes. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [March 24, 2026, 9:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3058 "2026-03-24T21:14:49Z")
We had a funny guy with us in Korea. Tail gunner. They blew his brains out all over the Pacific. There’s nothing funny about that. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2026, 8:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3059 "2026-03-25T20:26:55Z")
Oh, that’s true. Thanks a lot. I get my hopes up, you gotta crush 'em. Why do you have to be such a downer? ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [March 25, 2026, 9:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3060 "2026-03-25T21:05:44Z")
Now let’s not give up hope. We’ve got to believe Gilligan is still alive, and he’s going to stay that way. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=152) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=154)