# Speak to me in...TV quotes! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [November 17, 2022, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107 "2022-11-17T22:21:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 183
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2026, 4:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3641 "2026-10-18T16:08:45Z")
Please don’t squeeze the Charmin. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2026, 7:05pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3642 "2026-10-18T19:05:47Z")
Please don’t come to my funeral. Have a good night. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2026, 7:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3643 "2026-10-18T19:21:54Z")
"t’s called an Irish wake. It’s a way to memorialize death, but celebrate life at the same time. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 18, 2026, 8:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3644 "2026-10-18T20:39:47Z")
The deceased will deliver the eulogy. Mourners will then have twenty minutes for rebuttal. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2026, 5:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3645 "2026-10-21T17:34:46Z")
I don’t want anybody to make any fuss. When I go, I just want to be stood outside in the garbage with my hat on. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2026, 8:31pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3646 "2026-10-21T20:31:15Z")
“Would you take the garbage out?” “Of course. Where is it?” “In your shoes.” ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [October 21, 2026, 9:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3647 "2026-10-21T21:24:55Z")
Bart, open your heart. I admit I have some mighty big shoes to fill… (Big shoes to fill… Big shoes to fill… Big shoes to fill… Big shoes to fill…) ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2026, 12:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3648 "2026-10-22T00:06:34Z")
I’ve spent $40,000 on shoes and I have no place to live? I will literally be the old woman who lived in her shoes! ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2026, 1:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3649 "2026-10-22T13:15:00Z")
The baby doesn’t have shoes on. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [October 22, 2026, 4:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3650 "2026-10-22T16:25:46Z")
Oh he’s not my little brother. If he was \*my\* little brother I would hit him until he took the right shoes. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 23, 2026, 4:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3651 "2026-10-23T04:09:02Z")
Wally, if your dumb brother tags along, I’m gonna–Oh, good afternoon, Mrs. Cleaver. I was just telling Wallace how pleasant it would be for Theodore to accompany us to the movies. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2026, 1:46pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3652 "2026-10-24T13:46:31Z")
You’re gonna get your ass kicked in high school. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2026, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3653 "2026-10-24T14:08:38Z")
High school is for learning, but it’s also where you should be learning to socialize. That’s what high school dances are all about. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2026, 3:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3654 "2026-10-24T15:45:56Z")
I ain’t going to no school dance. You know when they should have school dances? On Sunday morning. You know why? Because you’re already depressed. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2026, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3655 "2026-10-24T17:30:54Z")
Hey Barney? Guess who’s got a date to the prom! ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 24, 2026, 7:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3656 "2026-10-24T19:14:02Z")
Shut up, Ma! You’re making the night too damn special! ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 25, 2026, 11:37am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3657 "2026-10-25T11:37:48Z")
Last night you reacted to the situation. If you stopped to think for one second, then you’re dead or I’m dead. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [October 29, 2026, 11:13pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3658 "2026-10-29T23:13:13Z")
You’ve always loved me, more than I could understand. You need to pray for me, Lily. Can you ask God? Can you ask God to help me? I can not watch Carly die the way I watched you. ---
**Author:** ![DrDeth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b487fb/32.png) [@DrDeth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DrDeth)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2026, 3:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3659 "2026-10-30T03:23:28Z")
Dear Lord, thank you for Ziggy comics, little baby ducks and ‘Sweatin’ to the Oldies,’ volumes one, two and four. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [October 30, 2026, 1:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/3660 "2026-10-30T13:32:50Z")
It’s Hungarian duck food! It’s got shredded prunes, jellied liver and it’s topped with a fish sauce. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=182) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=184)