# Speak to me in...TV quotes! **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [November 17, 2022, 10:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107 "2022-11-17T22:21:24Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 38
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/741 "2023-05-03T22:18:26Z")
Please try to wear something appropriate. It won’t help my case if the judge is busy trying to read the word “Juicy” scrawled across your buttocks. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/742 "2023-05-03T22:19:27Z")
How _YOU_ doin’? ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 11:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/743 "2023-05-03T23:00:59Z")
Always a pleasure to be hauled up in front of Yer Honor. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 3, 2023, 11:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/744 "2023-05-03T23:29:38Z")
Take your hands off your hips and stand up straight, like you’re in court… Uncross your arms. You are not at the beach… Hey, stop swaying! It’s making me nauseous. ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2023, 3:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/745 "2023-05-04T03:03:10Z")
If a dog don’t bite… ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 4, 2023, 8:14pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/746 "2023-05-04T20:14:40Z")
His bite is worse than his bark. ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2023, 12:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/747 "2023-05-05T00:10:15Z")
If I don’t like you, I’ll fire you! If you don’t like me, I’ll fire you! ---
**Author:** ![Bicycle\_Bill](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bicycle_bill/32/6208_2.png) [@Bicycle\_Bill](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bicycle_Bill)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2023, 9:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/748 "2023-05-05T09:05:54Z")
Jetson, YOU’RE FIRED! _ **-“BB”-** _ ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2023, 12:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/749 "2023-05-05T12:03:15Z")
Was that wrong? Should I have not done that? I tell ya, I gotta plead ignorance on this thing because if anyone had said anything to me at all when I first started here that that sort of thing was frowned upon… you know, cause I’ve worked in a lot of offices and I tell you people do that all the time. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 5, 2023, 10:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/750 "2023-05-05T22:37:05Z")
Would it be impolite at this point in the conversation to just run away from you? ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 12:07am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/751 "2023-05-06T00:07:16Z")
This is an environment of welcoming, and you should just get the hell out of here. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 12:47am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/752 "2023-05-06T00:47:56Z")
Everybody Hates Chris. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/753 "2023-05-06T17:47:11Z")
Is there no way we can get rid of him? ---
**Author:** ![llikewise](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/llikewise/32/8522_2.png) [@llikewise](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/llikewise)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 7:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/754 "2023-05-06T19:18:06Z")
Don’t think of it as me walking away, think of it as you being left behind. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 7:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/755 "2023-05-06T19:59:14Z")
Stick him with the pointy end. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [May 6, 2023, 8:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/756 "2023-05-06T20:07:35Z")
Your agility with the sword, sir, should serve you well in California. ---
**Author:** ![Ignatz](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/3be4f8/32.png) [@Ignatz](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ignatz)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2023, 12:27pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/757 "2023-05-07T12:27:10Z")
Seventy-nine and stiff as a varnished eel…I had six wives, you know, and hundreds of lovers. I penetrated their bodies and I penetrated their minds. Because I was a man. That’s what I was supposed to do…and now, women are batting me around like a feathered shuttlecock. My wife, my daughters, and a judge in a skirt and tonight I’m going to have a nurse wipe my ass. How does this happen? Hmmm, you tell me. ---
**Author:** ![Bayaker](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bayaker/32/3454_2.png) [@Bayaker](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bayaker)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2023, 1:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/758 "2023-05-07T13:33:39Z")
Soup, sandwiches, and emasculation. Just like my mom used to make. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2023, 9:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/759 "2023-05-07T21:09:13Z")
Is this your idea of a love affair, where you treat a woman as a leper? ---
**Author:** ![knoodler](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/ccd318/32.png) [@knoodler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/knoodler)\ **Post date:** [May 7, 2023, 9:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107/760 "2023-05-07T21:57:47Z")
Circle, circle, dot, dot. Now you’ve had a cootie shot. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=37) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-in-tv-quotes/975107.md?page=39)