# Speak to me only in Movie Quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [July 20, 2012, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882 "2012-07-20T20:16:37Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 227
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 9:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4524 "2013-09-24T21:19:14Z")
You’re the saddest bunch I’ve ever met. But you can bet before we’re through Mister, I’ll make a man out of you. ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 10:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4525 "2013-09-24T22:34:37Z")
In the past twenty-one days, you boys have made some fine progress. You’re not fighting soldiers yet, but I’d match you up against some Nazi cocktail waitress anytime. ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 10:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4526 "2013-09-24T22:51:37Z")
Remember, there are no bad crews, only bad leaders. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 24, 2013, 11:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4527 "2013-09-24T23:34:44Z")
Situation quiet; the Captain’s been put away for the night. ---
**Author:** ![Dendarii\_Dame](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/bbce88/32.png) [@Dendarii\_Dame](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dendarii_Dame)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 12:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4528 "2013-09-25T12:37:40Z")
Stay awake. Don’t rest your head. Don’t lie down upon your bed. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 12:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4529 "2013-09-25T12:48:41Z")
One, two, Freddy’s coming for you. / Three, four, better lock your door. / Five, six, grab your crucifix. / Seven, eight, gonna stay up late. / Nine, ten, never sleep again. ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 4:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4530 "2013-09-25T16:49:15Z")
Look, if it’s about that time I puked green slime and masturbated with a crucifix, it was my first keg party, Bobby! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 4:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4531 "2013-09-25T16:55:33Z")
My brother and I used to say that drownin’ in beer was like heaven, eh? ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 8:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4532 "2013-09-25T20:23:31Z")
I’ve seen ‘em do it, man. They fuckin’ drown 'em in that shit. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 8:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4533 "2013-09-25T20:35:26Z")
I’m thinking about getting my bartender’s license. ---
**Author:** ![Typo\_Negative](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/typo_negative/32/484_2.png) [@Typo\_Negative](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Typo_Negative)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 9:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4534 "2013-09-25T21:36:41Z")
Jesus, nobody twisted your arm to be here. You’re here of your own volition. You like to think the weight of the world rests on your shoulder. Like this place would fall apart if Dante wasn’t here. Jesus, you overcompensate for having what’s basically a monkey’s job. You push fucking buttons. Anybody can waltz in here and do our jobs. You-You’re so obsessed with making it seem so much more epic, so much more important than it really is. Christ, you work in a convenience store, Dante! And badly, I might add! I work in a shitty video store, badly as well. You know, that guy Jay’s got it right, man. He has no delusions about what he does. Us, we like to make ourselves seem so much more important than the people that come in here to buy a paper, or, god forbid, cigarettes. We look down on them as if we’re so advanced. Well, if we’re so fucking advanced, what are we doing working here? ---
**Author:** ![Gladys\_Overnow](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/839c29/32.png) [@Gladys\_Overnow](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Gladys_Overnow)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 10:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4535 "2013-09-25T22:19:29Z")
“I love the smell of commerce in the morning!”- ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2013, 11:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4536 "2013-09-25T23:16:46Z")
This isn’t the Junior Chamber of Commerce, Brad! ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 1:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4537 "2013-09-26T01:43:53Z")
The richest one percent of this country owns half our country’s wealth, five trillion dollars. One third of that comes from hard work, two thirds comes from inheritance, interest on interest accumulating to widows and idiot sons and what I do, stock and real estate speculation. It’s bullshit. You got ninety percent of the American public out there with little or no net worth. I create nothing. I own. We make the rules, pal. The news, war, peace, famine, upheaval, the price per paper clip. We pick that rabbit out of the hat while everybody sits out there wondering how the hell we did it. Now you’re not naive enough to think we’re living in a democracy, are you buddy? It’s the free market. And you’re a part of it. You’ve got that killer instinct. Stick around pal, I’ve still got a lot to teach you. ---
**Author:** ![kevja](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/aeb1de/32.png) [@kevja](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kevja)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 5:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4538 "2013-09-26T17:24:47Z")
I hope this is better than the last batch of shit you gave me. Produced more wood than Ron Jeremy. I don’t want you to yell, “Reco!” anymore. Know what you should yell? “Timber!” Yeah, Mr. Fuckin’ wood. I hear you fuckin’ makin’ your calls. It’s bullshit, all right? I mean if you want them off the phone so bad, why don’t you just hang up? You should get them excited. You know, excited? They should beg for a broker on the first call. ---
**Author:** ![JohnM](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/848f3c/32.png) [@JohnM](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/JohnM)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 5:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4539 "2013-09-26T17:28:16Z")
It is vital that we work to a few golden rules. Always work in a small team. Keep a very low profile. Only deal with people who come recommended. And it’s like selling anything else: washing machines, hand made shoes, blowjobs. As long as you don’t take the piss people will always come back for more. And that is not to say we don’t have that special kind of magic that makes two kilos into three. But never be too greedy. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 6:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4540 "2013-09-26T18:03:16Z")
There are certain RULES that one must abide by in order to successfully survive a horror movie. For instance, number one: you can never have sex. Sex equals death, okay? Number two: you can never drink or do drugs. The sin factor! It’s a sin. It’s an extension of number one. And number three: never, ever, ever under any circumstances say, “I’ll be right back.” Because you won’t be back. ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 6:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4541 "2013-09-26T18:11:45Z")
First of all, keep him out of the light, he hates bright light, especially sunlight, it’ll kill him. Second, don’t give him any water, not even to drink. But the most important rule, the rule you can never forget, no matter how much he cries, no matter how much he begs, never feed him after midnight. ---
**Author:** ![Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/prof.pepperwinkle/32/13627_2.png) [@Prof.Pepperwinkle](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Prof.Pepperwinkle)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 6:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4542 "2013-09-26T18:20:04Z")
The making of a great compilation tape, like breaking up, is hard to do and takes ages longer than it might seem. You gotta kick off with a killer, to grab attention. Then you got to take it up a notch, but you don’t wanna blow your wad, so then you got to cool it off a notch. There are a lot of rules. ---
**Author:** ![want2befree](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/3e96dc/32.png) [@want2befree](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/want2befree)\ **Post date:** [September 26, 2013, 6:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882/4543 "2013-09-26T18:29:14Z")
You choke the chicken before any big date, don’t you? Tell me you spank the monkey before any big date. Oh my God, he doesn’t flog the dolphin before a big date. Are you crazy? That’s like going out there with a loaded gun! Of course that’s why you’re nervous. Oh my dear friend, please sit, please. Look, um, after you’ve had sex with a girl, and you’re lying in bed with her, are you nervous? No… It’s 'cause you ain’t got the baby batter on the brain anymore! Jesus, that stuff will fuck you’re head up! Look, the most honest moment in a man’s life are the few minutes after he’s blown his load - now that is a medical fact. And the reason for it is that you’re no longer trying to get laid, you’re actually… you’re thinking like a girl, and girls love that. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882.md?page=226) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-movie-quotes/628882.md?page=228)