# Speak to me only in Simpsons Quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 17, 2012, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819 "2012-08-17T21:16:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 12
**Author:** ![orcenio](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/orcenio/32/1036_2.png) [@orcenio](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/orcenio)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2012, 12:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/221 "2012-09-14T00:57:16Z")
“…and I contend that those tourists were decapitated **before** they entered the Krustyland House of Knives. Next question.” ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 14, 2012, 2:05am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/222 "2012-09-14T02:05:07Z")
I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2012, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/223 "2012-09-15T11:41:33Z")
Lisa, vampires are make-believe, like elves, gremlins, and Eskimos. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2012, 5:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/225 "2012-09-15T17:26:46Z")
So … do you like stuff? ---
**Author:** ![Ponch8](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/ponch8/32/9883_2.png) [@Ponch8](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponch8)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2012, 7:10pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/226 "2012-09-15T19:10:03Z")
Umm, can you repeat the part of the stuff where you said all about the things? The…things? > [@echo7tango](#): > > I like my beer cold, my TV loud and my homosexuals flaming. It’s more like “fuh-LAME-ing!” ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2012, 10:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/227 "2012-09-15T22:49:18Z")
You must pay a fine of TWO American dollars! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 15, 2012, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/228 "2012-09-15T23:06:29Z")
A woman is a lot like a refrigerator. Six feet tall, 300 pounds…it makes ice. ---
**Author:** ![terentii](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/terentii/32/212_2.png) [@terentii](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/terentii)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2012, 1:30am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/229 "2012-09-16T01:30:36Z")
Why don’t you start a rumor that he’s ding-a-ling-a-ling, hello! Oh-oh-oh-oh-oh, what a delicious quiche! I drive a pink Miata! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 16, 2012, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/230 "2012-09-16T03:34:43Z")
I’ve done everything the Bible says — even the stuff that contradicts the other stuff! ---
**Author:** ![robardin](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/43a26b/32.png) [@robardin](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/robardin)\ **Post date:** [September 20, 2012, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/231 "2012-09-20T22:40:26Z")
“This Bible cost fifteen bucks, and talk about a preachy book! EVERYONE’S a sinner! …Except this guy.” ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2012, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/232 "2012-09-21T00:31:39Z")
Bart, with $10,000 we’d be millionaires! ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2012, 6:34pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/233 "2012-09-21T18:34:21Z")
This match will determine once and for all which nation is the greatest on earth: Mexico or Portugal! ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2012, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/234 "2012-09-22T01:28:58Z")
I hope I didn’t brain my damage. ---
**Author:** ![blondebear](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/blondebear/32/1022_2.png) [@blondebear](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/blondebear)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2012, 2:04am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/235 "2012-09-22T02:04:15Z")
Call Mister Plow, That’s my name. The name again Is Mister Plow ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2012, 2:06am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/236 "2012-09-22T02:06:18Z")
I’m normally not a praying man, but if you’re up there, please save me, Superman. ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2012, 1:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/237 "2012-09-22T13:20:26Z")
39 Fops a-fopping, 38 Fishwives hawking, 37 Coopers cooping, 36 Bootblacks buffing, 35 Buskers busking, 34 Something something, 33 Alchemists transmuting, 32 Dutchmen plotting, 31 Doctors leeching, 30 Year average life span, 29 Smiths a-forging, 28 Coopers cooping, We did that one already. Shh. 27 Eelers eeling, 26 Anarchists bombing, 25 Swamis foreseeing, 24 Sideburns curling, 23 Monks a-changing, 22 Rats a-plaguing, 21 Coxswains calling, 20 Flautists fluting, 19 Footmen bowing, 18 Gungas dinning, 17 Seventy six, 16 Midwives birthing, 15 Aliens alienating, 14 Jacks a-ripping, (gasp) 13 Scriveners scrivening, 12 lords a-leaping. ---
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [September 22, 2012, 1:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/238 "2012-09-22T13:24:59Z")
Fire can be our friend; whether it’s toasting marshmallows or raining down on Charlie. ---
**Author:** ![hogarth](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hogarth/32/1773_2.png) [@hogarth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/hogarth)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2012, 4:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/239 "2012-09-25T16:39:54Z")
I’ve been called ugly, pug-ugly, fugly, pug-fugly, but never ugly-ugly! ---
**Author:** ![YogSothoth](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/8edcca/32.png) [@YogSothoth](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/YogSothoth)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2012, 6:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/240 "2012-09-25T18:32:51Z")
“He’s jumping out of the car Kent! He’s trying to climb over the fence! Now he’s realizing he’s too fat! He’s digging a hole like a dog! Now he’s given up on that and he’s running back and forth! He’s climbing into a pipe and he seems to be stuck! His legs are dangling in a comical fashion! It’s the saddest thing I’ve ever seen!” ---
**Author:** ![Pashnish\_Ewing](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/8797f3/32.png) [@Pashnish\_Ewing](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Pashnish_Ewing)\ **Post date:** [September 25, 2012, 7:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/241 "2012-09-25T19:04:20Z")
I can’t promise I’ll try, but I’ll _try_ to try. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819.md?page=11) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819.md?page=13)