# Speak to me only in Simpsons Quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** Thread Games\ **Created:** [August 17, 2012, 9:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819 "2012-08-17T21:16:26Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 42
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2014, 8:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/822 "2014-11-26T08:55:50Z")
…and heeere comes the ambulance! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2014, 6:04pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/823 "2014-11-26T18:04:38Z")
Ok, boys, when you meet Jesus, be sure to call Him Mr. Christ. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2014, 6:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/824 "2014-11-26T18:36:50Z")
Kids, let me tell you about another so-called “wicked” guy. He had long hair and some wild ideas, and he didn’t always do what other people thought was right. And that man’s name was… I forget. But the point is… I forget that too. Marge, you know who I’m talking about? He used to drive that blue car? ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2014, 7:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/825 "2014-11-26T19:12:34Z")
Ugh, 35 years in show business and already no one remembers me, just like what’s-his-name and whose-it, and you know that guy, always wore a shirt? ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [November 26, 2014, 7:38pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/826 "2014-11-26T19:38:23Z")
Oh sure, like lawyers work in big skyscrapers and have secretaries. Look at him! He’s wearing a belt! That’s Hollywood for ya. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2014, 2:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/827 "2014-11-27T02:48:06Z")
Hey, I know how you feel; I was beat in tic-tac-toe by a chicken. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2014, 4:49am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/828 "2014-11-27T04:49:09Z")
Yeah, with the Internet and such these days, the kids practically raise themselves! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [November 27, 2014, 10:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/829 "2014-11-27T10:43:17Z")
“We gotta spread this stuff around. Let’s put it on the internet!” “No! We have to reach people whose opinions actually matter.” ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2014, 4:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/830 "2014-11-30T04:26:17Z")
Bill Gates: “Oh, I didn’t get rich by writing a lot of checks!” ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [November 30, 2014, 5:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/831 "2014-11-30T17:22:04Z")
Smashy, smashy! ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 7:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/832 "2014-12-01T19:02:02Z")
Sparkle, sparkle. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 7:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/833 "2014-12-01T19:19:31Z")
I’m disrespectful to dirt. Can you see that I am serious? ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 9:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/834 "2014-12-01T21:12:26Z")
You are the Emperor of Last Year. ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 1, 2014, 9:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/835 "2014-12-01T21:18:10Z")
I think I’ll call him Stampy. ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 12:31am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/836 "2014-12-02T00:31:58Z")
“They’re playing that elephant song again.” “I love that. Reminds me of elephants.” ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:48am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/837 "2014-12-02T05:48:11Z")
Make way, I challenge you to a duel, comin’ through, an affair of honor, blah blah blah. ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/838 "2014-12-02T17:18:48Z")
Never, Marge! Never! I can’t live the button-down life like you. I want it all: the terrifying lows, the dizzying highs, the creamy middles. Sure, I might offend a few of the bluenoses with my cocky stride and musky odors - oh, I’ll never be the darling of the so-called “City Fathers” who cluck their tongues, stroke their beards, and talk about \*“What’s to be done with this Homer Simpson?” \* ---
**Author:** ![Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/7cd45c/32.png) [@Elendil\_s\_Heir](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Elendil_s_Heir)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:47pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/839 "2014-12-02T17:47:38Z")
:: sniff :: You’re the first one who ever called me “sir” without adding, “you’re causing a scene.” ---
**Author:** ![burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/burpo_the_wonder_mutt/32/365_2.png) [@burpo\_the\_wonder\_mutt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/burpo_the_wonder_mutt)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 5:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/840 "2014-12-02T17:49:45Z")
(Mumbled): I’m horny! ---
**Author:** ![buddha\_david](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/ee7513/32.png) [@buddha\_david](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/buddha_david)\ **Post date:** [December 2, 2014, 8:19pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819/841 "2014-12-02T20:19:01Z")
One man, no ducks. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819.md?page=41) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-simpsons-quotes/631819.md?page=43)