# Speak to me only in Straight Dope Message Board quotes **URL:** \ **Category:** The Game Room\ **Created:** [August 17, 2012, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822 "2012-08-17T21:49:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Bullitt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bullitt/32/5725_2.png) [@Bullitt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bullitt)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 11:41am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/41 "2012-08-19T11:41:51Z")
Sight? ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 7:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/42 "2012-08-19T19:01:50Z")
…pulls up a lawn chair. ---
**Author:** ![toofs](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/4491bb/32.png) [@toofs](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/toofs)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 7:43pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/43 "2012-08-19T19:43:54Z")
Get off my lawn! And shit. ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 9:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/44 "2012-08-19T21:22:44Z")
> [@toofs](#): > > Get off my lawn! And shit. [“Woooo!!! I AM MASTURBATING LIKE A MOTHER FUCK!!!”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=241922) ---
**Author:** ![etv78](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/e/d78d45/32.png) [@etv78](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/etv78)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 9:23pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/45 "2012-08-19T21:23:59Z")
> [@RedFury](#): > > [“Woooo!!! I AM MASTURBATING LIKE A MOTHER FUCK!!!”](http://boards.straightdope.com/sdmb/showthread.php?t=241922) Post #13 ---
**Author:** ![RedFury](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/ec9cab/32.png) [@RedFury](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/RedFury)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 9:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/46 "2012-08-19T21:25:38Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > Post #13 Ooops! “That’s what happens when I don’t read the whole thread.” ---
**Author:** ![dogbutler](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dogbutler/32/428_2.png) [@dogbutler](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/dogbutler)\ **Post date:** [August 19, 2012, 9:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/47 "2012-08-19T21:44:47Z")
> [@etv78](#): > > Post #13 Gotcha ya!b ---
**Author:** ![John\_DiFool](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/john_difool/32/19543_2.png) [@John\_DiFool](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/John_DiFool)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 2:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/48 "2012-08-20T02:23:16Z")
Citepanzee! ---
**Author:** ![Hoopy\_Frood](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/hoopy_frood/32/8452_2.png) [@Hoopy\_Frood](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hoopy_Frood)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/49 "2012-08-20T04:15:11Z")
I love sheep! ---
**Author:** ![Annie-Xmas](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/ecc23a/32.png) [@Annie-Xmas](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Annie-Xmas)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 1:12pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/50 "2012-08-20T13:12:45Z")
I wish I had a monkey butler. ---
**Author:** ![Ludovic](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/7ab992/32.png) [@Ludovic](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ludovic)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 1:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/51 "2012-08-20T13:16:33Z")
I for one welcome our new monkey butler overlords. As opposed to manny people who think they should just fucko off. ---
**Author:** ![Yllaria](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yllaria/32/3452_2.png) [@Yllaria](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Yllaria)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/52 "2012-08-20T15:39:19Z")
> [@divemaster](#): > > ..pulls up a lawn chair. Opens cooler, hands **divemaster** a beer. ---
**Author:** ![divemaster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/divemaster/32/78_2.png) [@divemaster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/divemaster)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 6:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/53 "2012-08-20T18:59:00Z")
You owe me a new keyboard! ---
**Author:** ![Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/bosda_di_chi_of_tricor/32/16845_2.png) [@Bosda\_Di\_Chi\_of\_Tricor](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bosda_Di_Chi_of_Tricor)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/54 "2012-08-20T19:17:35Z")
> [@Yllaria](#): > > Opens cooler, hands **divemaster** a beer. _Haunted_ cooler– **divemaster** and **Yllaria** are consumed by Ancient Evil. ---
**Author:** ![Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/intergalactic_gladiator/32/112_2.png) [@Intergalactic\_Gladiator](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Intergalactic_Gladiator)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/55 "2012-08-20T19:22:23Z")
I’ll be in my bunk. I am aware of the origins of that quote. ---
**Author:** ![Clothahump](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/51bf81/32.png) [@Clothahump](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Clothahump)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:55pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/56 "2012-08-20T19:55:13Z")
[Obligatory XKCD link.](http://xkcd.com/314/) ---
**Author:** ![Boyo\_Jim](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/87869e/32.png) [@Boyo\_Jim](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Boyo_Jim)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 7:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/57 "2012-08-20T19:56:38Z")
Epic Fail! ---
**Author:** ![kayT](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kayt/32/3633_2.png) [@kayT](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kayT)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 8:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/58 "2012-08-20T20:16:53Z")
Isn’t anyone going down to the quarry? ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 8:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/59 "2012-08-20T20:25:26Z")
Magnets! How do they fucking work? ---
**Author:** ![Hal\_Briston](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/h/a9a28c/32.png) [@Hal\_Briston](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Hal_Briston)\ **Post date:** [August 20, 2012, 8:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822/60 "2012-08-20T20:30:00Z")
> [@Hoopy\_Frood](#): > > I love sheep! Sicko. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822.md?page=2) [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speak-to-me-only-in-straight-dope-message-board-quotes/631822.md?page=4)