# Speechless **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [December 22, 2013, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948 "2013-12-22T13:26:42Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 15\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![pnkflyd11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a3d4f5/32.png) [@pnkflyd11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pnkflyd11)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2013, 1:26pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/1 "2013-12-22T13:26:42Z")
I am starting a new job tomorrow, managing nine people I haven’t met. Any suggestions on how to address the staff. Such as focus on teamwork, respect toward each other, maybe a perspective I haven’t considered? Thanks for any input. ---
**Author:** ![Atomic\_Alex](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/atomic_alex/32/175_2.png) [@Atomic\_Alex](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Atomic_Alex)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2013, 1:42pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/2 "2013-12-22T13:42:54Z")
“Right, good morning team. My name is Pinkflyd11 and I’m your new manager. Now, if you play straight with me you’ll find me a considerate employer, but cross me and you’ll find that under this playful boyish exterior beats the heart of a ruthless sadistic _maniac_.” Just in case, don’t actually do this… ---
**Author:** ![MandaJo](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/ac91a4/32.png) [@MandaJo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/MandaJo)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2013, 1:51pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/3 "2013-12-22T13:51:23Z")
You want to give the impression that you are new, and know that you need to learn the ropes, and are certainly going to be open to listening to institutional memory so as not to reinvent the wheel ten times, but at the same time, convey that you are the boss, you are qualified, and that you will lead. You want people to feel comfortable telling you things you don’t know that you need to know, but not to feel like that means you’ll do whatever you are told. You want to set it up so that if you need to go ask someone how XYZ situations have been handled in the past, it’s seen as you learning how this particular company works, not you learning how to do your job. Women, especially, have a tendency to start a new job with an apology (“I know you really liked so and so” or “I know right now you all know my job better than I do” or “I just want to say in advance that I am only one person and I will do my best”) and once they do that, all kinds of perfectly normal learning-curve things now reinforce the impression that someone is somewhat incompetent. ---
**Author:** ![Becky2844](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/91b2a8/32.png) [@Becky2844](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Becky2844)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2013, 3:39pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/4 "2013-12-22T15:39:57Z")
You might want to touch on the things that are going to stay the same, giving you the opportunity to mention some things that are likely to change. If you go in with the feeling “I’ve got this,” they’ll believe you. If you want input I’d do it in a professional way (one-on-one in your office) rather than informally in the snack room. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 22, 2013, 5:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/5 "2013-12-22T17:01:38Z")
Do you have to address the group as a group? It seems to me that you’d just be setting yourself up for a breakroom critique session afterwards, in which you might or might not come out well. You’re BEGGING them to talk about you behind your back (which they will do anyway, but why set yourself up like this?). We just got a new boss and he had a long visit with each one in his office just to get to know people and know what they’re doing. Can’t you just circulate among the various work stations and introduce yourself to each person warmly, with interest and appreciation? I wouldn’t make any pronouncements about what is going to change/stay the same/what you plan to do/blahblahblah AT ALL until you’ve met everyone, sized up the situation, gotten the lay of the land, seen how the cow eats the cabbage, and similar analogies. Just meet everyone, establish yourself as a non-uptight, accessible person, and chill for a week or so. Don’t go in like [del]ghostbusters[/del] gangbusters. Ease into the position. ---
**Author:** ![Rachellelogram](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rachellelogram/32/8689_2.png) [@Rachellelogram](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rachellelogram)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 9:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/6 "2013-12-23T21:28:09Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > Do you have to address the group as a group? It seems to me that you’d just be setting yourself up for a breakroom critique session afterwards, in which you might or might not come out well. You’re BEGGING them to talk about you behind your back (which they will do anyway, but why set yourself up like this?). > > We just got a new boss and he had a long visit with each one in his office just to get to know people and know what they’re doing. Can’t you just circulate among the various work stations and introduce yourself to each person warmly, with interest and appreciation? > > I wouldn’t make any pronouncements about what is going to change/stay the same/what you plan to do/blahblahblah AT ALL until you’ve met everyone, sized up the situation, gotten the lay of the land, seen how the cow eats the cabbage, and similar analogies. > > Just meet everyone, establish yourself as a non-uptight, accessible person, and chill for a week or so. Don’t go in like [del]ghostbusters[/del] gangbusters. Ease into the position. I like this approach. ---
**Author:** ![Suburban\_Plankton](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/suburban_plankton/32/219_2.png) [@Suburban\_Plankton](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Suburban_Plankton)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 9:33pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/7 "2013-12-23T21:33:07Z")
What industry are you working in? It seems rather odd to start a new manager two days before Christmas… ---
**Author:** ![Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Springtime_for_Spacers)\ **Post date:** [December 23, 2013, 11:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/8 "2013-12-23T23:06:06Z")
It would be difficult to talk into as vacuum. One approach to consider is to get them to talk. Introduce yourself, then invite your new team to introduce themselves. Ask questions like “What is the best thing about working here.” Maybe even try something like "What was your \*worst \*day here. Good luck. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 12:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/9 "2013-12-24T00:55:18Z")
> [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](#): > > It would be difficult to talk into as vacuum. One approach to consider is to get them to talk. Introduce yourself, then invite your new team to introduce themselves. Ask questions like “What is the best thing about working here.” Maybe even try something like "What was your \*worst \*day here. > > Good luck. This isn’t camp. People will NOT reveal themselves in this setting. The only people who will speak up will be the Teacher’s Pets and suck-butts. For a new supervisor to put people on the spot in front of himself AND their peers would get everything off on the wrong foot. This would destroy any nascent trust and haunt him forever. Six months later: “Remember that first day when you asked us to ‘_share_’ our ‘_feelings_’? \<_laugh-laugh_\> And then Mary Lou in HR started licking your ass? \<_more laugh-laugh_\> Boy, did we have fun acting that out at Happy Hour that night. It took us all a while to recover from that and realize you were okay.” JMHO ---
**Author:** ![Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a3d4f5/32.png) [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Springtime_for_Spacers)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 1:13am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/10 "2013-12-24T01:13:27Z")
> [@ThelmaLou](#): > > This isn’t camp. People will NOT reveal themselves in this setting. The only people who will speak up will be the Teacher’s Pets and suck-butts. For a new supervisor to put people on the spot in front of himself AND their peers would get everything off on the wrong foot. This would destroy any nascent trust and haunt him forever. > > Six months later: > > “Remember that first day when you asked us to ‘_share_’ our ‘_feelings_’? \<_laugh-laugh_\> And then Mary Lou in HR started licking your ass? \<_more laugh-laugh_\> Boy, did we have fun acting that out at Happy Hour that night. It took us all a while to recover from that and realize you were okay.” > > JMHO I wasn’t trying to be camp. or do you mean some American cultural phenomenon that I’m unaware of. Where I’m from introducing yourself to someone you’ve not met before is quite usual. ---
**Author:** ![Washoe](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/w/ecae2f/32.png) [@Washoe](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Washoe)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 1:21am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/11 "2013-12-24T01:21:56Z")
“If we make our quarterlies, I’ll smoke you all out.” Wins ‘em over every time. ---
**Author:** ![ThelmaLou](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thelmalou/32/390_2.png) [@ThelmaLou](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/ThelmaLou)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/12 "2013-12-24T01:55:39Z")
> [@Springtime\_for\_Spacers](#): > > I wasn’t trying to be camp. or do you mean some American cultural phenomenon that I’m unaware of. Where I’m from introducing yourself to someone you’ve not met before is quite usual. Sorry. I meant “we’re not **AT CAMP** ,” meaning in an informal, safe, fun, temporary environment (“summer camp”). Introducing himself to each person one-to-one as I suggested above, would be quite effective and proper. In a formal, possibly not safe (something could be held against you), serious, permanent, PUBLIC setting…asking people to stick their necks out and speak up? No. Don’t do it. ---
**Author:** ![Chefguy](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/chefguy/32/138_2.png) [@Chefguy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Chefguy)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 2:09am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/13 "2013-12-24T02:09:12Z")
> [@pnkflyd11](#): > > I am starting a new job tomorrow, managing nine people I haven’t met. Any suggestions on how to address the staff. Such as focus on teamwork, respect toward each other, maybe a perspective I haven’t considered? Thanks for any input. Those two topics will put them on their guard, as they will immediately assume that you’ve been told that they have no teamwork and that they show no respect to each other. I agree with comments above to keep it brief, perhaps tell them your background, tell them there will obviously be a period for you to come up to speed and that you’ll be talking to them individually about their responsibilities and workloads in the near future. Don’t try to be their friend. I’m sure you know that, but just in case: it’s much harder to have to be a hard ass later when you’ve come on as Mr. Friendly in the beginning. It’s much easier to be a nice guy later after being their boss now. Be approachable, but be the boss. ETA: I just noticed that you posted your thread yesterday, so I guess whatever advice there is above is too late. ---
**Author:** ![jonesj2205](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/j/ecc23a/32.png) [@jonesj2205](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/jonesj2205)\ **Post date:** [December 24, 2013, 2:16am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/14 "2013-12-24T02:16:45Z")
Talk less, listen more - particularly to the people who don’t say a lot. And one-on-one is a great approach. Ask a ton of questions. Specifics about how things are done and why. You’ll learn a lot about who keeps the place running and who is a BS’er based on those conversations. Once you get to the point where you know more than they do, that’s the time to tell them how things are going to change. ---
**Author:** ![pnkflyd11](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/p/a3d4f5/32.png) [@pnkflyd11](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/pnkflyd11)\ **Post date:** [December 31, 2013, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/speechless/676948/15 "2013-12-31T02:29:37Z")
Thanks to everyone for their viewpoint. I spoke to each individually, all has gone well. Nursing Home-Yeah, starting on the 23rd was odd. I did tell the administrator I was looking forward to the Christmas bonus.