# Spell Check Stories **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [February 22, 2010, 8:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018 "2010-02-22T20:22:07Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 16\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![Morbo](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/morbo/32/389_2.png) [@Morbo](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Morbo)\ **Post date:** [February 24, 2010, 11:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/41 "2010-02-24T23:59:26Z")
I had this on my office wall for a time: ```auto **MS Word presents....Jabberwocky!** 'Teas billing, and the slushy tones Did gyre and gamble in the wave: All mimes were the boogies, And the mime rats outrage. "Beware the Jabberwocky, my son! The jaws that bite, the claws that catch! Beware the Jujube bird, and shun The furious Bandersnatch!" He took his viral sword in hand: Long time the manhole foe he sought -- So rested he by the Tutu tree, And stood awhile in thought. And, as in huffish thought he stood, The Jabberwocky, with eyes of flame, Came whiffing through the bulgy wood, And burbled as it came! One, two! One, two! And through and through The viral blade went snicker-snack! He left it dead, and with its head He went galumphing back. "And, has thou slain the Jabberwocky? Come to my arms, my beamish boy! O frabjous day! Callow! Allay!' He chortled in his joy. 'Teas billing, and the slushy tones Did gyre and gamble in the wave; All mimes were the boogies, And the mime rats outrage. ``` ---
**Author:** ![Lord\_Mondegreen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/l/91b2a8/32.png) [@Lord\_Mondegreen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Mondegreen)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 3:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/42 "2010-02-25T03:11:15Z")
> [@yanceylebeef](#): > > … there were a couple of projects I wanted to keep on the front burner, and not let slip down the rabbit hole. Once we’re done with spellchecker stories, maybe we could tackle “mixed metaphor stories.” 😃 ---
**Author:** ![Shot\_From\_Guns](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ccd318/32.png) [@Shot\_From\_Guns](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Shot_From_Guns)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 4:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/43 "2010-02-25T16:45:23Z")
> [@Morbo](#): > > I had this on my office wall for a time I’m actually surprised by how many words got through. Amazing how many were adapted into common use. ---
**Author:** ![Ferret\_Herder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/e47774/32.png) [@Ferret\_Herder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ferret_Herder)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 5:11pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/44 "2010-02-25T17:11:17Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > I’m actually surprised by how many words got through. Amazing how many were adapted into common use. It seems like the capitalized ones made it - perhaps they were assumed to be proper names and left alone? I’m a fan of this poem on the topic: > [@](#): > > Eye Halve a Spelling Chequer > > Eye halve a spelling chequer > It came with my pea sea > It plainly marques four my revue > Miss steaks eye kin knot sea. > > Eye strike a key and type a word > And weight four it two say > Weather eye am wrong oar write > It shows me strait a weigh. > > As soon as a mist ache is maid > It nose bee fore two long > And eye can put the error rite > Its rarely ever wrong. > > Eye have run this poem threw it > I am shore your pleased two no > Its letter perfect in it’s weigh > My chequer tolled me sew. > > – Sauce unknown ---
**Author:** ![kopek](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kopek/32/337_2.png) [@kopek](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kopek)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 6:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/45 "2010-02-25T18:06:06Z")
I wrote an article on the Milice of New France (Canada), hit spell check and hit send. And ended up with several cases of the “Malice of New France”, “French Malice” and variations there of. I stopped blushing about it after a year or two. ---
**Author:** ![Sternvogel](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/bc79bd/32.png) [@Sternvogel](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sternvogel)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 9:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/46 "2010-02-25T21:49:24Z")
> [@Mama\_Zappa](#): > > Spell check + names = hilarity, often! You reminded me of when Maura McHugh was coaching for the Sacramento Monarchs of the WNBA. In an article about that women’s basketball team, her name appeared as “Aura Chug”. ---
**Author:** ![Sue\_Duhnym](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/91b2a8/32.png) [@Sue\_Duhnym](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sue_Duhnym)\ **Post date:** [February 25, 2010, 11:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/47 "2010-02-25T23:48:46Z")
About a year ago, my neighbor had vandals throw chunks of sod and dirt into her pool. She was peeved and delivered fliers to everyone in the neighborhood encouraging them to, “Be vigilante.” Heh. ---
**Author:** ![interface2x](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/c0e974/32.png) [@interface2x](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/interface2x)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2010, 12:22am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/48 "2010-02-26T00:22:31Z")
> [@Shot\_From\_Guns](#): > > A coworker once saw an email that apologized for the “incontinence.” Speaking of … Someone at my Fortune 500 retailer company once did this. From my email account. To a distribution list of 200 people. Including the CMO. He was doing some reporting while I was on vacation so he just used my computer to do it. Instead of logging out and logging back in as himself, I gave him permission to use my email address as people were used to getting that email from me anyway. One night while I was on vacation, I decided to check my email and saw one from a coworker that said “You do know that incontinence is an inability to control your bodily functions, right?” I wondered what the hell that was about so I checked the Sent mail. Luckily I found it pretty funny and no one ever held it against me! ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2010, 12:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/49 "2010-02-26T00:38:12Z")
There is a well known cognitive psychologist called Ulric Neisser. His last name is pronounced “nicer,” however, the WordPerfect 5.1 spellchecker says he is Nastier. I wonder if it was programmed by a disgruntled former student. My dentist is an Indian lady named Savithri Ravindran, or (to the Thunderbird spellchecker) Mithridates Hindrances. ---
**Author:** ![Machine\_Elf](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/82dd89/32.png) [@Machine\_Elf](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Machine_Elf)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2010, 3:15pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/50 "2010-02-26T15:15:25Z")
Spellchecker can lead you to make ill-advised corrections, but Word’s auto-correct feature can make those ill-advised corrections without you even noticing, as soon as you finish typing the word. It’s handy for me, when I type “teh” and it autocorrects to “the”. But it can also be used for evil purposes. If you have access to someone else’s computer, you can fire up Word and edit the Autocorrect database, instructing it to replace particular misspellings (or even entirely correct spellings) with the word or phrase of your choice. For example, you can tell it to replace “manager” with “asshole manager”. or “programmer” with “code monkey”. Giant substitutions like that will be immediately obvious to the victim, but if you’re truly evil, you can get it to make more subtle substitutions that aren’t likely to be noticed until the document has been sent. For example, replace “Bob” with “Boob.” ---
**Author:** ![yanceylebeef](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/yanceylebeef/32/12290_2.png) [@yanceylebeef](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yanceylebeef)\ **Post date:** [February 26, 2010, 3:36pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/51 "2010-02-26T15:36:53Z")
I was in the Air Force when I first found out about this feature. Autocorrecting your NCO’s computer to change his last name to “Butthurt” seemed like a good idea at the time, but in retrospect, not so much. ---
**Author:** ![njtt](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/ecd19e/32.png) [@njtt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/njtt)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2010, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/52 "2010-03-26T19:24:11Z")
OK, I know this thread is a bit old, but I couldn’t resist this one. My wife and I are currently in the process of legal separation. Her attorney’s name is Makupson. The spellchecker in Firefox just suggested to me that this should be _Breakups_. Seems ideal for a divorce attorney. ---
**Author:** ![villa](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/bc79bd/32.png) [@villa](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/villa)\ **Post date:** [March 26, 2010, 7:29pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/53 "2010-03-26T19:29:11Z")
My old Amstrad Word Processor I had when I did my Masters always suggested changing “Rupert Murdoch” to “Raper Murderer.” I never found out if it was actually attempting to correct the spelling or making a political statement. ---
**Author:** ![may\_be\_ignorant](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/c5a1d2/32.png) [@may\_be\_ignorant](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/may_be_ignorant)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2010, 12:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/54 "2010-03-27T00:58:36Z")
> [@malleus](#): > > _sigh_ for the last time, the “[hole in the bedsheet](http://snopes.com/religion/sheet.asp)” story is a myth… hahahahaha ---
**Author:** ![campp](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/c/c5a1d2/32.png) [@campp](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/campp)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2010, 1:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/55 "2010-03-27T01:57:38Z")
One of the early versions of spellchecker would change my last name to Pissed Off. I don’t know why, but it did! ---
**Author:** ![GIGObuster](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/gigobuster/32/421_2.png) [@GIGObuster](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/GIGObuster)\ **Post date:** [March 27, 2010, 2:40am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018/56 "2010-03-27T02:40:19Z")
I really dislike that they are not coming with context spell checkers, how hard would it be to tell them to stop and ask you if you mean “X” instead of “Z” when your “favorite” misspelled words are typed? Cursed “wring” when I want to type “bring”! :mad: [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spell-check-stories/530018.md?page=2)