# Sperm Count (of Doom) **URL:** \ **Category:** Miscellaneous and Personal Stuff I Must Share\ **Created:** [July 16, 2000, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712 "2000-07-16T01:01:48Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 9\ **Page:** 3
**Author:** ![TheIncredibleHolg](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/8797f3/32.png) [@TheIncredibleHolg](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TheIncredibleHolg)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 9:24am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/41 "2000-07-20T09:24:36Z")
Just hilarious, Scylla. And I can relate. I had a vasectomy a few weeks ago and will have to deliver a few samples for testing over the next months. Now, my urologist lives some 25 minutes away from my home, and he told me the samples must be no older than 30 mins. So here’s what I’ll have to do: I’ll go to the bathroom in the morning just before work, my wife knowing EXACTLY what I’m going to do. I’ll lock the door to keep the kids out, which will make them howl outside until I’m done. (I normally allow them in, they’re very young.) Having performed the necessary act of willpower and concentration, I’ll leave the bathroom, climb over the kids, kiss my wife goodbye (who still knows EXACTLY what I just did) and grin sheepishly while I hurry out of the house. I’ll hide the cup under my jacket in case I meet a neighbor, and if I do, I’ll avoid the usual chat under some pretext. Then I’ll jump in the car and rush off like a thief. Is that awkward or what? ---
**Author:** ![DRY](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/a87d85/32.png) [@DRY](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/DRY)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 12:17pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/42 "2000-07-20T12:17:34Z")
Scylla, “Self-love, my liege, is not so vile a sin As self-neglecting.” –Henry V, Act 2, Scene IV Oh, and Ruffian’s such a tease–leave it to her to post a really hot picture on the people page, and talk dirty in this thread AFTER she’s gotten engaged! ---
**Author:** ![Satan](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/e9bcb4/32.png) [@Satan](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Satan)\ **Post date:** [July 20, 2000, 12:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/43 "2000-07-20T12:22:06Z")
Scylla: That was a great post, and in fact I shall give it the best compliment I can give it when I say it reminded me of a Wally (mis)adventure. Thank you… * * * Yer pal, Satan _TIME ELAPSED SINCE I QUIT SMOKING: Three months, one week, four days, 10 hours, 18 minutes and 0 seconds. 4097 cigarettes not smoked, saving $512.15. Life saved: 2 weeks, 5 hours, 25 minutes._ ---
**Author:** ![Ruffian](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/r/71e660/32.png) [@Ruffian](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ruffian)\ **Post date:** [July 21, 2000, 5:52pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/44 "2000-07-21T17:52:46Z")
😉 Hey Mr. C, dare I ask…just what list am I on?? ---
**Author:** ![Scylla](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/a5b964/32.png) [@Scylla](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Scylla)\ **Post date:** [July 22, 2000, 12:45am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/45 "2000-07-22T00:45:17Z")
Thanks Satan. That is very high praise indeed. ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2001, 7:59am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/46 "2001-06-27T07:59:59Z")
This is one more that needs to be saved from the pruner. –sublight. ---
**Author:** ![kabbes](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/k/e99b99/32.png) [@kabbes](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kabbes)\ **Post date:** [June 27, 2001, 9:10am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/47 "2001-06-27T09:10:23Z")
? It’s last post is _seven months_ after the prune date! Are we going to start seeing every popular thread made in _the year 2000_ start to come through these parts now as well as the 1999 ones? pan ---
**Author:** ![Sublight](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/439d5e/32.png) [@Sublight](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sublight)\ **Post date:** [June 28, 2001, 1:03am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/48 "2001-06-28T01:03:27Z")
I thought the pruning was for pre-2001 posts. It’s not? Crap. Sorry, everybody. :o –sublight. ---
**Author:** ![The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/74df32/32.png) [@The\_Devil\_s\_Grandmother](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/The_Devil_s_Grandmother)\ **Post date:** [September 21, 2001, 10:01pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712/49 "2001-09-21T22:01:25Z")
I have looked to sheep for satisfaction, but find none. So I seek amusement in Scylla’s old posts. [Previous page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/sperm-count-of-doom/25712.md?page=2)