# Spinoff of the "people dropping in unannounced" thread **URL:** \ **Category:** In My Humble Opinion\ **Created:** [September 8, 2013, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353 "2013-09-08T20:45:59Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 8:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/1 "2013-09-08T20:45:59Z")
One of the posts reminded me of the Family Circus cartoons, which periodically have the boss at the dinner table. I’m not talking about the whole department going out and socializing, that kind of thing, but specifically having your boss and his wife (yes, that was deliberate) as your dinner guest, with the kids all freshly scrubbed and on their best behavior (you hope) and of course Mom has to prepare the food. Does anyone actually do this kind of thing any more, or ever did? Just curious. 😕 ---
**Author:** ![Kent\_Clark](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kent_clark/32/105_2.png) [@Kent\_Clark](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kent_Clark)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 10:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/2 "2013-09-08T22:18:11Z")
My father brought his boss to our home a couple of times. Of course, we were at the branch office and the boss was from the main office, which means that the boss was traveling at the time, and my father just invited him for a home-cooked meal and an evening of something more than watching TV in his hotel room. ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 10:40pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/3 "2013-09-08T22:40:45Z")
I’ve worked in the business world for 24 years. I’ve never had my boss (with or without spouse) over for dinner, and I’ve only ever known one or two people who have. It feels very much like a 1960s sitcom trope to me. 🙂 ---
**Author:** ![Rhiannon8404](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/rhiannon8404/32/17929_2.png) [@Rhiannon8404](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rhiannon8404)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 10:57pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/4 "2013-09-08T22:57:18Z")
My dad never had his boss over to dinner. My mom never had her boss over to dinner. My husband has never had his boss over to dinner. The only time I had a boss over for dinner was when I was really good friends with her and her husband and it was really more of a friend thing than a boss/employee thing. ---
**Author:** ![Thylacine](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/thylacine/32/1143_2.png) [@Thylacine](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Thylacine)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 11:18pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/5 "2013-09-08T23:18:58Z")
My mother’s second husband worked for a US based multinational so there were always senior staff traveling the globe. If they were in Melbourne my mother was slaving away over something with a french accent in the kitchen whilst her man served scotch (sherry for the lady if there was one though wives rarely made the trips) in the living room before they all met up in the formal dining room. We kids were in another part of the house being quiet though we were likely dressed up for the introductions. My mother found this lifestyle in about 1970 and kept it up until he retired and they left the city in the mid nineties. I understand he received similar treatment in his own travels. ---
**Author:** ![Spud](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/spud/32/347_2.png) [@Spud](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Spud)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 11:20pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/6 "2013-09-08T23:20:14Z")
30 years ago I invited my boss over for dinner. I cooked (guy) and she brought her husband. No kids involved at the time to get dressed up. She had me and my wife over a few weeks earlier, but we were both basically fresh out of college people looking to establish some basic social friends. If I did it now (totally different job), she would also bring her husband… if I asked her boss she would also bring her husband… if I asked her boss he would also bring his husband. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 11:37pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/7 "2013-09-08T23:37:56Z")
I’m pretty sure that my parents hosted my father’s department head at the university once or twice. But my parents are from a generation (perhaps the last one) that threw dinner parties. On the other hand, I’ve attended informal gatherings of the company staff at someone’s (not necessarily the manager’s) house. ---
**Author:** ![Fluffy\_PickleSniffer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/77aa72/32.png) [@Fluffy\_PickleSniffer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fluffy_PickleSniffer)\ **Post date:** [September 8, 2013, 11:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/8 "2013-09-08T23:45:05Z")
If people know me well enough to come to my back door and give a shout, they’re welcome to drop by anytime. Mostly that would be neighbors, family and close friends. If people don’t know me that well and have to knock on the front door and wait - especially if they come during a time I’m not normally up for visiting (evenings I like to get in jammies early and be lazy) then they’re liable to discover that I’m very good at playing “not at home” even when my car is in the drive. I’m good at claiming I was out for a walk, or in the back yard doing something, or down in the basement sorting laundry so must have missed them kinda thing next time I see them if they bring it up. Then I’ll tell them to ring ahead and ask if it’s a good time. ---
**Author:** ![Green\_Bean](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/green_bean/32/1760_2.png) [@Green\_Bean](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Green_Bean)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 1:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/9 "2013-09-09T01:28:15Z")
Nothing to share from personal experience, but just for fun: Reading the OP, I thought I remembered having seen this on The Jetsons. Apparently I did. I ran into this TV Tropes page on it: [Dinner with the Boss](http://tvtropes.org/pmwiki/pmwiki.php/Main/DinnerWithTheBoss). There aren’t that many examples listed–I know I’ve seen it a lot more than the list would suggest. The page said “It’s something of a Discredited Trope, though, perhaps due to the fact that it rarely happens in Real Life,” but doesn’t give any further information on whether it normally happened in the past. ---
**Author:** ![Dewey\_Finn](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/dewey_finn/32/4222_2.png) [@Dewey\_Finn](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dewey_Finn)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 1:55am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/10 "2013-09-09T01:55:26Z")
From a 1998 [article](http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/1998/02/02/237198/) on the divorce of Gary Wendt (formerly CEO of GE Capital) and his wife Lorna, “She was expected to entertain–sometimes extravagantly, sometimes informally, at the drop of a hat. (Just how much entertaining she did is a bone of contention.) She had Wendt’s colleagues over for a New Year’s Day lobster dinner little more than a week after the birth of their first child in 1968. In the early years she’d often throw together a dinner party on scant hours’ notice.” So in some households, it was much as I saw on episodes of Bewitched. The husband would call his stay-at-home wife in the afternoon to let her know that he was bringing people home and she was expected to have dinner ready for them. Presumably the house had to be spotless and she had to be appropriately dressed. Now, of course, with working wives, this doesn’t work as well. ---
**Author:** ![Tethered\_Kite](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/t/a5b964/32.png) [@Tethered\_Kite](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Tethered_Kite)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 2:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/11 "2013-09-09T02:11:05Z")
We don’t do much entertaining anymore but we did for years. I like to think I’m a good cook and most people seem to agree so going out for a meal is sometimes a disappointment compared to what we could have at home for less expense. It’s always been fun to plan menus and to set an attractive table. And over the years we made friends with quite a few couples who shared our enjoyment so back and forth we’d go, one-upping each other like crazy. All in fun and generosity. Now it’s usually limited to close friends and I seldom pull out all the stops. It just plain takes too long to get it all done to my satisfaction. And I’m fussy about not putting purchased food out for guests. I don’t understand why working wives of today can’t do it. I’d guess it is more that they don’t want to do it. It’s a pity to me that serving a good meal to people has come to mean a degradation of an educated woman’s time and talents. To me it was always a gift of warmth and hospitality. I just consider welcoming people into my home and sharing a meal with them to be an intimate offering of good will. ---
**Author:** ![Grrr](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/grrr/32/146_2.png) [@Grrr](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grrr)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 2:26am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/12 "2013-09-09T02:26:44Z")
My mom was a high level exec. Her boss was practically my uncle. Our family would always hang out with their family. We went on vacations together, had “Christmas before Christmas” together. And it wasn’t just the boss either, I remember a lot of the top brass being a significant part of my life. (Mom loved to entertain) Man! Talk about the “Good ol’ boy network”, these guys were definitely in a clique. When the big boss (uncle boss) quit one company to go work for another, he brought all his little buddies (My mom included) with him. And everyone who tagged along got giant raises. If this is typical of what goes on in the high executive world, it kind of makes me think your average Joe Schmoe hardly has a chance. ---
**Author:** ![yellowjacketcoder](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/y/4bbf92/32.png) [@yellowjacketcoder](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/yellowjacketcoder)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/13 "2013-09-09T02:28:49Z")
My wife had her boss over for dinner recently. He brought his wife. Our kid is a toddler, so he was decidedly not ‘scrubbed’. I grilled, she made some veggies, they brought gifts, it was pleasant. My own boss lives at least 75 minutes away from my house, so I doubt we’ll be having him for dinner anytime soon. ---
**Author:** ![Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/eyebrows_0f_doom/32/3119_2.png) [@Eyebrows\_0f\_Doom](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Eyebrows_0f_Doom)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 2:50am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/14 "2013-09-09T02:50:20Z")
I’ve had dinner with my boss and his husband at their apartment, but we’re not a big white-collar business type environment and are more friends than just employer/employee. ---
**Author:** ![nearwildheaven](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/90db22/32.png) [@nearwildheaven](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/nearwildheaven)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 2:57am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/15 "2013-09-09T02:57:18Z")
> [@Dewey\_Finn](#): > > From a 1998 [article](http://money.cnn.com/magazines/fortune/fortune_archive/1998/02/02/237198/) on the divorce of Gary Wendt (formerly CEO of GE Capital) and his wife Lorna, “She was expected to entertain–sometimes extravagantly, sometimes informally, at the drop of a hat. (Just how much entertaining she did is a bone of contention.) She had Wendt’s colleagues over for a New Year’s Day lobster dinner little more than a week after the birth of their first child in 1968. In the early years she’d often throw together a dinner party on scant hours’ notice.” > > So in some households, it was much as I saw on episodes of Bewitched. The husband would call his stay-at-home wife in the afternoon to let her know that he was bringing people home and she was expected to have dinner ready for them. Presumably the house had to be spotless and she had to be appropriately dressed. > > Now, of course, with working wives, this doesn’t work as well. And I’m assuming that calling a caterer was not allowed, either? ---
**Author:** ![BMalion](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/e274bd/32.png) [@BMalion](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/BMalion)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 3:34am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/16 "2013-09-09T03:34:03Z")
Yes, before I retired. I love to entertain! ---
**Author:** ![kenobi\_65](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kenobi_65/32/13178_2.png) [@kenobi\_65](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kenobi_65)\ **Post date:** [September 9, 2013, 3:58am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/17 "2013-09-09T03:58:56Z")
> [@nearwildheaven](#): > > And I’m assuming that calling a caterer was not allowed, either? Calling a caterer probably wouldn’t have been an option if she didn’t know she’d be entertaining that evening until her husband called her some time during the day. ---
**Author:** ![TruCelt](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/trucelt/32/523_2.png) [@TruCelt](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/TruCelt)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 5:25pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/18 "2013-09-12T17:25:21Z")
It was the norm in the 70’s Northern Virginia. I’ve never done it in adulthood, nor have any of my friends. ---
**Author:** ![Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/ecccb3/32.png) [@Skald\_the\_Rhymer](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Skald_the_Rhymer)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 5:30pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/19 "2013-09-12T17:30:57Z")
I’ve been the boss coming to dinner, but I don’t think I’m what the OP is looking for. The employee who had me over for dinner is my work wife, with whom I’ve been friends for about ten years. We were on the same level until my recent promotion, which she could have gotten as easily as I, I daresay. We’re friends outside of work as well. ---
**Author:** ![Sattua](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/sattua/32/11906_2.png) [@Sattua](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Sattua)\ **Post date:** [September 12, 2013, 5:35pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353/20 "2013-09-12T17:35:32Z")
When I was a child in the 80s my dad was the boss and sometimes had traveling employees over for dinner. As a twentysomething working for a startup five years ago, I sometimes I had the other twentysomething who was technically my boss over for dinner, because we were all pally with each other. Even had him over to get drunk when his wife divorced him. He got so out of it that he decided he was at home and it was bedtime, took his shoes off, and had to be carried out to the car and driven home. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spinoff-of-the-people-dropping-in-unannounced-thread/668353.md?page=2)