In every roommate situation I’ve been in, we’ve done it by bedroom size. In the first case, I offered to take the smallest bedroom in exchange for also taking the private parking spot while paying an even split of the rent. Everyone was fine with that.
In the second (which actually didn’t come to fruition, because the other roommates failed to tell us they wouldn’t consider the neighborhood we were looking at, even though I asked), there were three bedrooms, and my BF and I proposed that we would pay more for the master bedroom because it was larger. So we’d pay $700 for the master bed, the others would pay $550 for their bedrooms, but since there were two of us in the master bed that meant that individually we paid $350. Shared utilities would have been split four ways. The other two agreed this was fair.
If you view rent as payment for space, everyone will be using the common areas more or less equally (unless you’ve got some weird arrangements going on), but bedrooms are for private, exclusive use. So it makes sense to pay more if the space you have exclusive use of is larger than someone else’s.
I was my future wife’s boyfriend, moving into an apartment she shared with a roommate.
Fortunately for me, my wife held the lease. She gave the roommate a month’s notice, and I move in as soon as he moved out. She never really liked him anyway.
The “her new boyfriend is moving in” part alone is unreasonable on their part. That’s not something for them to decide. It’s something for you and her to decide. As far as keeping the rent split at 50/50? Hell no! Extremely unreasonable on their part. Like you want some deadbeat guy roaming around in his dirty underwear, making filthy jokes, inappropriate touching, hogging the TV, farting on the couch, making dirty dishes, adding to the trash that has to be taken out. And like you want to listen to them have sex or fight with each other… doors slamming at all hours at the night. Hell, maybe they’ll adopt a couple of kids, too so you can have a whole family to live with paying half rent. Why stop with the bf? There are countless ways in which another person living there will impact you negatively. This sounds like a terrible situation.
Oh, how gracious of them.
Hell yeah it’s an inconvenience. But it’s not unfair. It’s very unfair.
Oh… now you’re asking for specifics and numbers? That’s the hard part. Personally, I would be inclined to ask them to each pay a 1/3rd. That’s how I did it when I lived with a couple. Otherwise, take Sage Rat’s advice:
Wait… no, not that part of the advice! Luckily, Sage Rat starts to make sense after this :D:
This would be the most objective way to do it. It doesn’t take into account all of the numerous subjective factors to consider- but it will be very hard for them to argue against this.
This is the bare minimum you should accept. The “maximum” could be considered you paying only a 1/3 of the rent. The maximum is quite fair, and I highly recommend you do that.
You should also tell her this is on a contingency basis. If it doesn’t work out, then he’s got to go. Let us know how it works out. Or just me if no one else cares
That’s what I was going to say - no one moves into your apartment without YOUR approval, no matter how much your roommate loves her new boy. You have as much say in who lives there as she does. I think most people move out of their roommate situation when they move in with their lover - it’s just better that way for everyone.
I also think the rent should be split three ways, and all the expenses as well. As others have said, it isn’t just space in the bedroom that he’s renting - another person moving in changes everything.
Them paying half the rent is definitely not fair but I don’t see how them paying 2/3 is fair either. Why should they pay the same for half of a smaller room than the OP does for a whole larger room?
My advice is take your $650 and go rent a studio apartment by yourself, but having roommates sounds like torture to me.
These are really good points. They will pretty much never hang out in their room together: couples don’t do that, generally. They will be in the living room all the time. You will end up spending more and more time in your room because of the whole third wheel thing.
The having a vote thing also matters. If they are paying 50% of the rent in the household, then they should only get 50% of the say in household matters.
When I moved in with my now-husband and his roommate, I paid a third. Any other arrangement seems bound to breed resentment.
It should be split in thirds. An added benefit of that is that you will be able to save a little money to move into your own place. You won’t want to stay long in that type of living arrangement.
I think somewhere between 1/3 and 1/2 is most appropriate. You should get some kind of discount for their use of common areas and generally making things more crowded, but they should also get a discount because living two to a room is not the same as living one to a room. I think it’s reasonable that everyone gets some small benefit out of the bringing a new person in.
Your house mate should of talked to you “gotten your permission” before she said her SO is moving in. Split everything three ways. As others have mentioned it isn’t about the bigger room. If it becomes a point of contention, fuck it let them have the bigger room.
This would piss me off, but I would be a hard ass about it. Three ways or I’m out of here. Infact check your lease there maybe something in the contract about the amount of people allowed to live there.
I lived in a three bedroom appt once and our other room mate moved out, we had a good friend who was ready to move in. But right before he was about to, he got canned from his job. We had decided no job, you don’t live here. He was pissed that we pulled the rug out from under him so to speak. But tough.
Thanks for all the awesome replies!! The bf isnt moving in until October 1st, so I am going to have a sit down and discuss everything I need to. I have a sneaking suspicion that they are weeding me out slowly but we will see how the talk goes. She can’t move in with him because he lives with his parents and is obviously dying to leave (he moved in there after a breakup from another girl about a year ago). He’s only been with my roomie for like 2 months but that’s a whole other story . They are both in their late 30’s so I’m hoping we can have a mature discussion about this. My roomie is my friend so keep your fingers crossed. We dont have a lease but the communication between our landlord is mainly through her. The place is essentially hers. I’ve slowly started to look for a new place, have considered taking the smaller bedroom etc. The only reason I took the larger room is because I have 2 cats, and I keep the litter, food etc in there. If I took the smaller room, that stuff would have to go in the living room and I know they wouldn’t like that. I think I’d be ok with paying $500-$550.
Just wait until they break up and neither will move out. Or she does and his name isn’t on the lease, and he refuses to pay for certain things and the landlord goes after you for the rest of the money.
I’m also of the between 1/2 and 2/3 camp say 60%. Some say they are using only 2 bedrooms but what about the common areas. For anyone that has lived in a small 2 before knows that adding a third person to the equation can make the apartment seem very small with everyone sharing the small bathroom, small living room and small kitchen. They should have to pay for causing some of that inconvience.
But they may not see it that way.
ETA: Did you see Bridesmaids? That scene when the brother and sister invite Kristen Wiig to not live when them anymore? That’s going to be you.
With the new information, I’m sort of leaning that way now, too. The fact that the roommate has only been with this guy for two months is a red flag to me, too, though - maybe Emzah shouldn’t be too hasty to move out, since dude may not be there long, either.
I think my son took the best approach to this. When his roommate wanted to move his girlfriend in, my son immediately said “It’s okay, you two can have this apartment and I’ll find a new place.”
The time for the mature conversation would have been before your roommate sprung her boyfriend and rent-split as a done deal.
I’ll bet that even if you negotiate rent split, the boyfriend will decide he doesn’t like cats in the apartment.
Luckily, Sage Rat starts to make sense after this :D:
