Attractive as a quick lay, maybe, but not as a long-term partner.
I don’t know why I’m still surprised every time this happens on here, but I’m more than a little disappointed to see a thread about Mad Men deteriorate into an excuse for criticizing women and discounting feminism.
Would a show about a man with a dual life wherein the man was a dumpy, middle aged guy who is faithful to his wife be interesting to male OR female viewers? Hell no. Don Draper gets away with leading his multiple lives because he’s handsome and charismatic. If some viewers feel jealous of this or think Don Draper is someone they should envy or emulate, they aren’t really paying attention. Or perhaps it’s just a convenient platform to flog the same old dead horses.
Human nature isn’t anyone’s “fault.” It is, however, hypocritical for some women to pontificate how men should behave one way, while their revealed preferences are quite different, as demonstrated by Messrs. Draper, Cullen, et al.
However as this is not GD, I’ll just point out our area of agreement: that Don Draper is appealing to women in a deeply Darwinian sense, and leave it at that.
First of all, your article is hardly a peer reviewed psychoanalytical study of feminists and their hypocritical attraction to the Don Drapers of the world. It’s a couple of blogs where women admit that, though they are feminists, they find Jon Hamm’s portrayal of Don Draper sexy. I’m not sure this proves that feminists are hypocrites because they prefer certain tropes in literature and pop culture. TV characters are not real life. While I love watching Mad Men, find Don’s story compelling, and think Jon Hamm is hot as hell, that does not mean I would want a Don Draper in my actual personal life.
Also, I think this concept that feminists want men who think and act like women, or liking Don Draper makes it “as if by saying we want a ‘real man,’ we threaten to erase all the gains our mothers made in terms of equality in the workplace and the home” is bullshit to begin with. Finding Don Draper attractive and recognizing it is not the same as saying that we secretly want to go back to the 1950s, or that we all should want pussified men or we’re not towing the feminist line. That’s making a TV character way too important, and I think it’s all a little more complicated than that. Don Draper is a ballsy SOB, and that confidence is attractive. Unfortunately, that kind of brashness also goes hand in hand with being an asshole, and most intelligent women recognize that even as they notice his charms.
Feminists are not a monolith. Many focus on real world, meaningful issues, and stay away from the kind of scolding, petty social commentary you’re ragging on them for, with good reason. Maybe pontificating on how an entire gender should act or should want is a silly thing to do for anyone, no?
Don Draper is a TV character, and he’s written to be appealing, mysterious, charming, and fascinating to women. Trying to parlay him into a real world commentary on the hypocrisy of modern womanhood is making him do too much work for what he is IMO.
Sorry to interject a simple question, but…
My wife and I just joined the series in Season 3. Now, I know everyone will recommend we pick up the DVD’s for seasons 1 and 2–and at some point we will probably do that–but for those of us interested in picking up the series now, could someone summarize the essential backstory for season 1 and 2? I never realized just how worthless those “Previously on…” clip summaries at the start of a program were until I actually had to rely on one to catch up.
“Cullen”? Oh–the hero of the execrable Twilight saga. Since when is he a feminist heartthrob? Spike is my favorite vampire–but what do vampires have to do with “human nature”? (In fact, Spike was apparently quite faithful to his Drusilla for about a century. And he really loved Buffy, until he tried to rape her & she kicked his butt. Then he went off on a quest for a soul. Sorry for the Obligatory Whedon Reference!)
Problems with my cable service prevented me from seeing episode 1 of Mad Men’s new season. But this thread is about the first 2 seasons, anyway. In which we saw Don Draper pursue one woman besides his wife–Rachel Menken. She was bright & independent; their relationship was a real love affair that ended badly.
We saw him with Midge–a Bohemian artist; their long-standing “friends with benefits” relationship ended after he realized she was in love with someone else. Bobbie Barrett grabbed his attention (ahem) when he’d been trying to be a good husband. She was quite a piece of work, but turned out to be an interesting person, after all. Joy was just one of The Lotus Eaters–and he left her to visit The First Mrs Don Draper, with whom he had a deep, non-sexual relationship. (Although she liked looking at him!)
But poor Betty Draper–the beautiful ice princess so unlike the women who tempted Don. (And he turned down several easy lays during those first 2 years.) She’s so unhappy being an upper-middle-class SAHM but can’t think of anything else to do with her time but go riding. Let’s hope she picks up a copy of The Feminine Mystique. Don appears to be the reader in the family; perhaps he’ll bring a copy home from The City.
Men who claim to know “what women really want” remind me of the amazing Joan’s rapist husband. And many of us hope the writers have something really grisly in store for him…
How is Don less of a sexual terrorist than Dr. Rape? when Bobbie Barrett is trying to extort money for her husband’s apology, he grabs her, hoists her up onto a table reaches under her skirt thrusts his fingers into her vagina, and threatens to ruin she and her husband.
Wild guess? Because Bobbie Barrett was game for that sort of thing. They had an S+M vibe to their relationship. Joan was completely not consenting and terrorized. Bobbie seemed to find Don’s rough treatment of her hot.
Yikes! Probably easier to do by character…
Don Draper: Don Draper was originally Dick Whitman. During the Korean War, he and his commanding officer (the real Don Draper) were in an explosion which killed Real Don. Dick switched dog tags with Real Don and was sent home with a Purple Heart (Real Don was a few weeks out from release) and Dick Whitman was listed as KIA. Since then Don (I’m just calling the character in the main show Don now) has gone to work for Sterling Cooper and was the head of the creative department. When Roger Sterling had a heart attack, Don was made junior partner to help reassure worried clients who thought the firm was falling apart. Don had a string of affairs throughout the show including some artsy greeting card artist, a Jewish department store owner, the wife of a comedian, and some lesser liaisons. Currently the only main characters who know Don’s history secret are Pete Campbell and Bert Cooper.
Betty Draper: Wife of Don. Was once a model. In Season One, she spent some time at a psychologist, a plot line since dropped without mention. She was described by Don as “childish” which is pretty accurate if somewhat unfair. She threw Don out in Season 2 when she learned of one of his affairs and they reconciled at the end of the season. She has a few neighborhood friends and a short friendship with a divorcee which ended when she babysat for the woman’s child Glen and Glen convinced her to give him a lock of her hair. When Betty threw Don out, she reconnected with the divorcee (after finding Glen in her yard, having run away from home).
Pete Campbell: Account exec at Sterling Cooper. Established early on as a slimy guy who’d lie, cheat, etc to get ahead. Married to Trudy who he doesn’t seem to get along well with. When an opening came up for Head of Accounts, Pete used a box he stole off Don’s desk containing family artifacts to try to blackmail Don into giving him the position. Don called his bluff, Pete told Bert Cooper, Bert didn’t care and Pete came out looking stupid. Pete seems to have somewhat reined in his seedy side since then but who knows. Pete slept with Peggy Olsen right before his wedding, getting her pregnant (she had the baby at the closer of Season 1).
Peggy Olsen: Former secretary of Don Draper, Peggy showed aptitude for advertising and was given by Don a position as a junior copy writer. She had a baby at the end of Season 1 which she either gave up for adoption or gave to her sister to raise (there’s an argument to be made for either theory although Peggy tells Pete at the end of S2 that she gave it up for adoption). She is fiercely loyal to Don after Don covered for her absence following her childbirth and mental breakdown.
Joan Holloway: Office manager. Used to sleep with Roger Sterling in Season 1 and the beginning of S2. Was engaged in the end of S2 and was raped by her fiance in Don’s office (hence the term Dr. Rape for her now husband).
Roger Sterling: Former senior partner in Sterling Cooper before the buy-out. Had a heart attack in S1 followed by another. Divorced his wife of however many years to marry a 21 year old secretary of Don’s. Used to sleep with Joan. Probably the closest thing Don has to a friend.
I don’t think there’s much about the rest of the cast that can’t be picked up on quickly. Sal is gay, Ken Cosgrove is an account man who wants to write (and published a short story in S1), Kinsey (the guy with the beard) is… umm… a wannabe Bohemian and the other guy whose name I can’t recall runs the television department which he had made for him in Season 2 (?) and is married.
The only other important information I can think of is that, in Season 2, Duck Phillips was the Head of Accounts and a reformed alcoholic. He fell off the wagon, had numerous power clashes with Don Draper and eventually came across his old employers from England. He made a deal with them to arrange a buyout of Sterling Cooper in exchange for being made president of SC. During the closing negotiations, Duck presented his vision for the new Sterling Cooper and Don said he didn’t want to be part of it. Duck tried to leverage Don’s contract against him, Don noted that he didn’t have a contract and walked out. Duck was asked to leave and presumably let go entirely whereas Don is still with the firm. But now the British firm owns SC. The old executive staff is still around (Don Draper, Roger Sterling & Bert Cooper) running the day to day operations.
Hope that helps. You can also search Cafe Society for “Don Draper” (the string Mad Men won’t work since both words are less than four characters) for episode threads.
I really, REALLY suggest you don’t read that and just watch the previous seasons instead - when you see it laid out like all that it lacks all the context and nuance and emotional impact. That stuff with Don’s past? We had to WAIT for that.
I don’t think Draper is a hound dog in any way. He doesn’t sleep with any woman in a skirt, he has a very specific sort of woman that he likes. His wife is essentially a child, someone he picked because she perfectly fit the image he had for his life. But then he meets women that are like what he actually wants, independent and intelligent and he falls in love with them.
The conflict is between his duty to his image and to his wife and children, versus being able to get what he would actually like to do in life, which is to find a woman who understands him, and go off and…something. The unfortunate part is that he’s not sure what that something would be, and he really does love his family (in a distorted sense.)
There are scenes with his son that are absolutely the “real Don Draper” - that scene where he talked about never hitting him?
Could I grab you a cart or something? You seem to have brought a shitload of baggage to this party.
I know it seems glaringly obvious to say that the whole point of the show is this dichotomy, but, um… yeah.
To me, it’s interesting that Don’s “goodness” in relationships is always directly proportional to the “realness” of those relationships. His relationship with Betty is entirely based on lies that he’s deeply conflicted about, and so he constantly tests it.
His relationships with other women are by definition not “real”, and he treats them with varying degrees of indifference.
His relationships with people at work, though marginally abetted by the “Don Draper” identity, are based on his very real talent and skill, and his security in this allows him to relax. Relaxed Don is kinder, gentler Don.
Don is his absolute best self in his relationship with Anna Draper, who knows everything. Some people think his “best” self is his “real” self. Those people also like to think that about themselves.
Is any of this terribly complex? No. But it sure is fun to watch.
Oh, and Don Draper *is *a delectable piece of man candy. Candy is supposed to be a momentarily enjoyable treat, and is bad for you in large doses.
I think there were a couple of layers there. I think that mostly she is just a very much a “share the misery” kind of girl, but I also think she was curious, having her suspicions about Don, to see just how easily people could be persuaded to cheat.
Oh lord, that storyline squicks me out. Not that I believe she has any sexual interest in the boy, she just wants to be worshiped, and she’ll take it where she can get it. Betty’s selfishness is actually (IMO) portrayed as MORE monstrous than Don’s, inasmuch as she’s perfectly willing to lay all her problems on an already damaged ten year old.
When Don eturned from visiting Anna at the end of Season 2, it seemed that he really wanted to start over with Betty. Was he ready to tell her all about his past? Maybe not. But he remembered when he truly loved her & wanted to “work” on the marriage. And he truly cared about giving his children a good home–something he never had.
Betty’s reason for taking him back? She was pregnant. We’d seen her consider abortion–inconvenient back then but possible. But she wasn’t ready to start over as a divorcee. After considering her options (and boffing a stranger), she chose to take Don back.
Now as Season 3 begins, Don & Betty are getting along fine. But then he met the stewardess–although one night stands had not been his previous modus operandi; he preferred having affairs. So now we get to figure out what happened in the last few months. As we’re still learning about what happened when Don was Dick. And move forward in time, into the 60’s.
Note about Peggy’s kid: The show-runner has said that she gave him up for adoption. Although he did fake us out at the beginning of Season 2 with her nephew. In a flashback, we saw Peggy in the hospital & her sister heavily pregnant.