# Spongebob Squarepants question: Just how reprehensible is Mr. Krabs? **URL:** \ **Category:** Cafe Society\ **Created:** [August 9, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954 "2003-08-09T01:01:45Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 20\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 1:01am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/1 "2003-08-09T01:01:45Z")
Michaela and I got into an argument at the dinner table yesterday, over the issue of Mr. Krabs’s degree of “beyond the pale,” if you will. Specifically, the question is: what type of critter is a Krabby Patty made of? I say it’s crab, she says it’s hamburger. (We both agree that it isn’t seaweed, as Sebastian the Crab demonstrated that seaweed is unsuitable as a fast-food item on an episode of _The Little Mermaid_.) Is there a canonical answer available that anyone can point me to? ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 2:28am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/2 "2003-08-09T02:28:07Z")
“The Krabby Patty is a registered trademark of the Krusty Krab, and can only be discussed, in whole or in part, with its owner, Mr. Krabs. Some conditions reply. Results may vary.” And don’t even _think_ about asking him, anyway. The highly protected Krabby Patty has a very tough security system, as seen in the episode _Imitation Krabs_. Mr. Krabs ain’t telling. I asked him, but all he said is “Stay away from me money!” ---
**Author:** ![mobo85](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/b19c9b/32.png) [@mobo85](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/mobo85)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 2:29am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/3 "2003-08-09T02:29:35Z")
Now that I think about it, that should be “Some restrictions apply.” ---
**Author:** ![soulmurk](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/s/b782af/32.png) [@soulmurk](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/soulmurk)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 2:38am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/4 "2003-08-09T02:38:57Z")
I’m not knowledgable enough in the SBSP canon to hazard a real guess, though I do seem to recall that the recipe is a big secret. I’d just like to point out that if the patties were made of crab, that’d make Mr. Krab something of a cannibal/genocidal maniac. I don’t suppose it could be hamburger either, logically speaking. Where would he get beef at the bottom of the ocean? I’ll speculate that it’s fish food flakes tighly compacted into a patty. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 3:19am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/5 "2003-08-09T03:19:15Z")
Plankton! It’s plankton! And Plankton knows…but he doesn’t care! \ It’s Plankton! Soylent Krabby is PLANKTOOOOON! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:12am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/6 "2003-08-09T04:12:38Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by soulmurk \* > **I’d just like to point out that if the patties were made of crab, that’d make Mr. Krab something of a cannibal/genocidal maniac.** Actually, **soulmurk** , that was the position I was taking. I was trying to point out that it was just a wee bit inconsistent of Mr. Krab to be so frightened of tartar sauce when he was already peddling his brethren and cistern to all and sundry in Bikini Bottom. Except other crustaceans! Did you EVER see another crab dining at the Krusty Krab? NO! Why? Because Mr Krab is the only crab degenerate enough to set foot into the joint. Or else because he’s already slaughtered them all. Him and his greedy, auto-genocidal ways. I’m astonished that it’s been allowed to go on as long as it has. Something needs to be done. . . ---
**Author:** ![International\_Playboy](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/i/48db29/32.png) [@International\_Playboy](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/International_Playboy)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:15am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/7 "2003-08-09T04:15:00Z")
According to [this article](http://www.washtimes.com/metro/20030706-104812-6042r.htm), crabs (at least blue crabs) are cannibals. > [@](#): > > "Crabs of all sizes live an easy life at the hatchery at Columbus Center. Young crabs, once past the larval stages, are moved to tanks filled with a buffet of delicious brine shrimp. The plentiful shrimp are supplied in part to keep the crabs, voracious cannibals, from eating each other before they can be released. " So I see Mr. Krabs having no problem serving crab burgers. ---
**Author:** ![Nvme77](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/n/c89c15/32.png) [@Nvme77](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Nvme77)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:43am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/8 "2003-08-09T04:43:34Z")
This thread is important in my home as my son has asked on several occasions what a krabby patty was made of. Thank you. A thousand hossannahs to you!!! ---
**Author:** ![kaylasdad99](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kaylasdad99/32/3398_2.png) [@kaylasdad99](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/kaylasdad99)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 5:23am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/9 "2003-08-09T05:23:05Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by International Playboy \* > \*\*According to [this article](http://www.washtimes.com/metro/20030706-104812-6042r.htm), crabs (at least blue crabs) are cannibals. > > So I see Mr. Krabs having no problem serving crab burgers. \*\* Point taken, but only so far as it being not (exactly) unethical for him to eat them all himself. But to kill them and serve them up to the locals simply for his own s(h)el(l)fish gain? That’s Pit-worthy, man. ---
**Author:** ![Grousser](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/9d8465/32.png) [@Grousser](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Grousser)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/10 "2003-08-09T07:56:49Z")
I only hope it won’t show up some kind of jerk saying “Why do you even care? They’re just fictional characters!!”. Continue, please. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:00am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/11 "2003-08-09T11:00:25Z")
They once showed a Kabby patty in a ‘real life’ photo (similar to the shots of bob when he’s out of the water). It looked like a hamburger. Now, it’s not to say that crab isn’t in it, but if it is, he’s doing some pretty kooky stuff to it. Also, I would think it was more of a fish burger. He does, after all, call it a _krabby_ patty and not a crabby patty. The K indicates that it’s that fake crab stuff. His clientele (mainly fish) would have no problem eatting fish, despite the cannibalism of it. Now then, the real questions regarding Mr Krabbs are: what happened to Mrs Krabbs? and Is Pearl adopted? (am I the only one who thinks of Phil Hartman as Plankton?) ---
**Author:** ![Dalchini](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/d/b2d939/32.png) [@Dalchini](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dalchini)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:11am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/12 "2003-08-09T11:11:23Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Bad News Baboon \* > \*\* > what happened to Mrs Krabbs? > and > Is Pearl adopted? > (am I the only one who thinks of Phil Hartman as Plankton?) \*\* I don’t think Phil Hartman is plankton, Phil Hartman passed away before the show began. ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 11:39am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/13 "2003-08-09T11:39:05Z")
um. I know. What I meant is that Planton is very Phil Hartman-esque. Phil Hartman would have been an excellent Plankton. ---
**Author:** ![Agrippina](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/a/8797f3/32.png) [@Agrippina](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Agrippina)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 2:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/14 "2003-08-09T14:07:51Z")
Well, if Krabby Patties aren’t crabs, then they must be some sort of under-sea animal and the logical guess is that some of the customers are cannibals. 😃 And yes, Pearl has to be adopted. Mr. Krabs is a crab. Pearl is a whale. What I don’t get is that episode where SpongeBob and his friends (including Mr. Krabs) were making fun of Sandy because she was a mammal and couldn’t breathe underwater. Pearl is a mammal too, and I would guess she has to go to the surface. Either way, am I the only one who thinks Pearl is the more irritating characters of the show? Here’s the real question: if Patrick is so stupid and has never had a job, how does he afford a house and various articles for a house like a TV? ---
**Author:** ![Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/b/5fc32e/32.png) [@Bad\_News\_Baboon](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Bad_News_Baboon)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 4:59pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/15 "2003-08-09T16:59:56Z")
What if Pearl’s mom, Mrs Krabbs, was a whale? Maybe Pearl is some half crab half whale mutant. I do agree, she is really irritating. As for Patrick, my guess is that he is a trustfund baby. ---
**Author:** ![Greywolf73](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/g/d9b06d/32.png) [@Greywolf73](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Greywolf73)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 5:21pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/16 "2003-08-09T17:21:27Z")
> [@](#): > > \*Originally posted by Rabid Child \* > \*\* > > Here’s the real question: if Patrick is so stupid and has never had a job, how does he afford a house and various articles for a house like a TV? \*\* Ahhh, but he DOES have a job! You must not have seen the episode where Spongebob and Patrick adopt the lost baby oyster. Spongebob was the mother and Patrick was the father because, as Spongebob pointed out, Patrick didn’t wear a shirt. Patrick would leave early every morning for work wearing his suit and tie, carrying his briefcase. Spongebob later found out that Patrick was taking a briefcase full of doughnuts to his house and watching TV all day. That was his job! 🙂 Mr. Krabs will never reveal what’s in a Krabby patty because if he does, the robots might get him. ---
**Author:** ![voguevixen](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/v/b5ac83/32.png) [@voguevixen](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/voguevixen)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 6:45pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/17 "2003-08-09T18:45:20Z")
I’m getting a bad feeling about this. Anyone remember the episode of **Fututama** where we find out where Slurm comes from? ---
**Author:** ![Fern\_Forest](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/f/71c47a/32.png) [@Fern\_Forest](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Fern_Forest)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:24pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/18 "2003-08-09T19:24:25Z")
I’m guessing it’s [sea cow](http://www.palmbeach.k12.fl.us/congressms/portfolio/laura_files/endangered/west_indian_manatee.htm). So that’s why they’re endangered. Damn, now I’m hungry. ---
**Author:** ![Madawc](https://avatars.discourse-cdn.com/v4/letter/m/f08c70/32.png) [@Madawc](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Madawc)\ **Post date:** [August 9, 2003, 7:32pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/19 "2003-08-09T19:32:19Z")
well, i don’t know which episode it was in but **Tengu** is correct in saying that it was Plankton. If you wanted a funny answer this isn’t it, this is a somewhat fact after that show. The show was where Plankton himself tried to find out the secret recipe and when he does he’s shocked that it was plankton being used as the main ingriedient. ---
**Author:** ![Kamino\_Neko](https://sea3.discourse-cdn.com/straightdope/user_avatar/boards.straightdope.com/kamino_neko/32/34_2.png) [@Kamino\_Neko](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Kamino_Neko)\ **Post date:** [August 10, 2003, 2:56am UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954/20 "2003-08-10T02:56:39Z")
You’re KIDDING. I never saw the episode, and was just going for the whole Soylent Krabby joke… Day-um. [Next page](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spongebob-squarepants-question-just-how-reprehensible-is-mr-krabs/193954.md?page=2)