# Spread Out, You Mooks!
**URL:** https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587
**Category:** The BBQ Pit
**Created:** [July 30, 2004, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587 "2004-07-30T13:44:48Z")
**Posts on this page:** 20
**Page:** 1
### Author:  [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 1:44pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/1 "2004-07-30T13:44:48Z")
Guideline for Civilized Interaction #34 :
When entering a space designed to hold a large number of things, be it a parking lot, or a movie theater, or the like - and it is currently occupied by very few things, take it upon yourself to park/sit somewhere other than right next to someone who’s already there.
Witness : I went to Anchorman on Tuesday, intending to enjoy the film before it left theaters. And it was a very good movie. I was the first person in the theater. The only OTHER people to come in were a family of four. Who sat down behind me. Who had babbling children. Who’s father had emphysema or something. And who had come fresh from shopping in whichever store keeps the crinkliest plastic bags. And who insisted on repeatedly jarring the back of my chair.
Yes, if things are crowded, parking or sitting next to someone is fine and expected… but if you can very easily leave a buffer space so as to minimize the annoyance you inflict on someone, DO it!
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### Author:  [@erislover](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/erislover)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 1:49pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/2 "2004-07-30T13:49:56Z")
If you wouldn’t sit in the popular seats this wouldn’t happen. Simple.
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### Author:  [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 1:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/3 "2004-07-30T13:53:47Z")
Let me guess, you were sitting in the middle of the row, about halfway back, eh? And surprise, surprise, that other group decided to sit in the middle of their row, about halfway back, right?
You paid to rent the seat you sat in, numbnuts, not the 15 surrounding it.
Next time try sitting toward one side, or further back, or if you hate being around people so much, wait for it to come out on video and order it from Netflicks. That way you won’t have to see anyone at all.
Ya big girl’s blouse, ya.
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### Author:  [@tart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tart)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 1:56pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/4 "2004-07-30T13:56:03Z")
has gone down a zillion percent of late. I think people are too used to watching movies in their own home. There has not been one movie i’ve been to in the last 6 months where I haven’t had to turn around and stare at talkers.
I expect people to close their yaps as soon as the previews come on. The last thing i want to hear is some yutz explaining to their half-wit girlfriend what happened during the 5 minutes she was out refilling the giant tub-o-popcorn
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### Author:  [@Martiju](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martiju)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/5 "2004-07-30T14:02:06Z")
I’m with you on this one. Although I’d have probably just moved myself.
Worse is the bus or train - why, when there are empty seats - do people come and sit by me, or even half on me? I don’t think I’m \*that \* attractive or pleasant to talk to!!
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### Author:  [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:02pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/6 "2004-07-30T14:02:23Z")
> [@El\_Kabong](#):
>
> Let me guess, you were sitting in the middle of the row, about halfway back, eh? And surprise, surprise, that other group decided to sit in the middle of their row, about halfway back, right?
Ah, the vultures emerge.
No, while I was indeed in the middle, row-wise, I tend towards the front of the theater. Rows 5-7 of about 20 in total are where I gravitate.
And the peculiar thing was that they weren’t centered behind me in their row - the father was directly behind me, the kids and the mother back and to the right. If they’d been going for optimum seating, they’d have shifted two seats to their left.
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### Author:  [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:03pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/7 "2004-07-30T14:03:50Z")
> [@Martiju](#):
>
> I’m with you on this one. Although I’d have probably just moved myself.
>
> Worse is the bus or train - why, when there are empty seats - do people come and sit by me, or even half on me? I don’t think I’m \*that \* attractive or pleasant to talk to!!
I almost did - but I’m legendarily stubborn. And I thank heavens that I don’t do the mass-transit thing.
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### Author:  [@Ponder\_Stibbons](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Ponder_Stibbons)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:06pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/8 "2004-07-30T14:06:44Z")
I almost had the same thing happen to me once, CG. I say almost, because the moment they sat behind me and a kid started kicking the back of my seat I immediately got up and moved elsewhere. Meh.
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### Author:  [@Lord\_Ashtar](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Lord_Ashtar)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:08pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/9 "2004-07-30T14:08:21Z")
> [@tart](#):
>
> has gone down a zillion percent of late. I think people are too used to watching movies in their own home. There has not been one movie i’ve been to in the last 6 months where I haven’t had to turn around and stare at talkers.
Why would you do this? Does the girl have tremendous tits that you can’t take your eyes off of?
Oh, you’re bothered by their talking but won’t say anything about it. Serves you right.
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### Author:  [@SpaceDog](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/SpaceDog)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:09pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/10 "2004-07-30T14:09:35Z")
> [@tart](#):
>
> has gone down a zillion percent of late. I think people are too used to watching movies in their own home. There has not been one movie i’ve been to in the last 6 months where I haven’t had to turn around and stare at talkers.
I’ve been thinking recently it’s got better (the last couple of films I’ve seen we got all they through with no phones going off for instance).
I’ve said it before and I’ll say it again, some people are just rude and will be rude whereever they are. I’m in two minds about telling people or not, there have been times where people have gone “You know **'Dog** that’s really fucking annoying/rude/whatever” and I’ve said “OK I’ll stop” while thinking “Arse, I’ve done that for years and never thought twice – I wonder if it’s being annoying people all that time”. Common courtesy isn’t taught nowadays, and some people have just never stopped to think about it.
Like **Martiju** I’ll never understand the bus/train thing … really wouldn’t you prefer a whole double seat to yourself, the carriage is half empty are you try to conserve bodyheat or something.
I’m mainly posting to this thread to commend **CandidGamera** for using the word Mook, which is sorely underused.
SD
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### Author:  [@tart](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/tart)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:28pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/11 "2004-07-30T14:28:56Z")
> [@Lord Ashtar](#):
>
> Why would you do this? Does the girl have tremendous tits that you can’t take your eyes off of?
>
> Oh, you’re bothered by their talking but won’t say anything about it. Serves you right.
laughs! If i want to look at tremendous tits, I will just gaze downward. 😉
I have no problem asking people to quiet up. Normally making them aware that they are disturbing others is enough to make them stop.
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### Author:  [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 2:53pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/12 "2004-07-30T14:53:56Z")
> [@Martiju](#):
>
> Worse is the bus or train - why, when there are empty seats - do people come and sit by me, or even half on me?
You just look way comfy compared to a bus seat? _squash_
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### Author:  [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 3:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/13 "2004-07-30T15:00:09Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#):
>
> You just look way comfy compared to a bus seat? _squash_
Aww, if it were _you_, **jsgoddess** , we wouldn’t mind so much. 😃
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### Author:  [@El\_Kabong](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/El_Kabong)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 3:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/14 "2004-07-30T15:07:58Z")
> [@](#):
>
> No, while I was indeed in the middle, row-wise, I tend towards the front of the theater. Rows 5-7 of about 20 in total are where I gravitate.
Oh, well, that’s different, then. Well, not really. Anyway, don’t take my comments personally. This is the Pit. You’re probably not really a big girl’s blouse.
Here’s the logic of what happened. Of course this family (let’s call them the O’blivions) ignored your presence. When they enter the theater, there you are, one tiny (relatively speaking) person, no doubt sitting there silently. As far as they are concerned, you are _actually a part of the theater_. You’re not disturbing them in any way, so of course they sit wherever they want, and that just happens to be the row behind you.
If, when they came in, you were a group of six or more making all the noise a group of six or more can make, or if you were furiously crinkling yards of cellophane, or loudly breaking wind, or clucking like a hen, would they choose to sit immediately behind you? Would they fuck.
So now you know how to deal with this in the future. No, that’s all right; the warm feeling of knowing that I’ve done some good is thanks enough for me.
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### Author:  [@Martiju](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Martiju)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 3:22pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/15 "2004-07-30T15:22:10Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#):
>
> You just look way comfy compared to a bus seat? _squash_
It \*could \* be that. 🙂
It is hard, I find, to extricate oneself from under somebody else’s buttocks in a polite manner.
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### Author:  [@Rufus\_Xavier](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Rufus_Xavier)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 3:48pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/16 "2004-07-30T15:48:05Z")
> [@tart](#):
>
> laughs! If i want to look at tremendous tits, I will just gaze downward. 😉
Cite? 😉
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### Author:  [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 4:00pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/17 "2004-07-30T16:00:32Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#):
>
> Aww, if it were _you_, **jsgoddess** , we wouldn’t mind so much. 😃
Even though I jumped so hard during “Signs” that popcorn flew everywhere? Are you _sure_ you want me sitting next to you? 😃
> [@Martiju](#):
>
> It is hard, I find, to extricate oneself from under somebody else’s buttocks in a polite manner.
I don’t know about polite, but would a whispered, “You make me so _hot_” have any effect? 😃
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### Author:  [@CandidGamera](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/CandidGamera)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 4:07pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/18 "2004-07-30T16:07:06Z")
> [@jsgoddess](#):
>
> Even though I jumped so hard during “Signs” that popcorn flew everywhere? Are you _sure_ you want me sitting next to you? 😃
I thought we were talking about sitting _on_ someone, not _next_ to someone.
😉
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### Author:  [@Dog80](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/Dog80)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/19 "2004-07-30T16:16:06Z")
> [@Martiju](#):
>
> Worse is the bus or train - why, when there are empty seats - do people come and sit by me, or even half on me? I don’t think I’m \*that \* attractive or pleasant to talk to!!
People won’t sit next to me even when it is the only unoccupied seat. They actually prefer standing rather than sitting next to me ☹
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### Author:  [@wonky](https://boards.straightdope.com/u/wonky)
#### Post date: [July 30, 2004, 4:16pm UTC](https://boards.straightdope.com/t/spread-out-you-mooks/257587/20 "2004-07-30T16:16:36Z")
> [@CandidGamera](#):
>
> I thought we were talking about sitting _on_ someone, not _next_ to someone.
Hey, you’re right.
That means you can hold my popcorn! 😃
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